[CONTENTID1]Archive: Review for xuexue_elf[/CONTENTID1]

[CONTENTID2]The Devil & I[/CONTENTID2]

[CONTENTID3]

Story Title: The Devil & I

Author: xuexue_elf

Main Characters: Kris (Wu Yifan), Feng Yin Hu (OC)

Genre: Angst, Drama, Romance,

Status: Completed

Description of Story: YiFan is the top delinquent at Two Moon high, He's known as the Devil, either you bow to him or your under his boot begging for mercy. Teachers cower when he is near. Thinking of standing up against him? Ha his crew of lawless friends will make you wish you were dead.Enter top transfer student FengYin Hu , age 17. A bit niave, all around good girl. She's thrown into the crazniess of Two Moon High mid year.What happens when a good girl meets the devil? Once the Devil steals your heart there's no going back

 

 

 

CRITIQUE:

Story Title: 3.5/5

The title actually inspired me to read the sotry. When I first read the title I was like this is different to other title's which are too common or to unattractive.

 

Graphics: 6/10

I didn't like the graphics as the OC's picture on the graphics was not HQ meaning it wasn't clear enough for me to get the image of the character in my head. Though the background was pretty good as it blended with the story(the writing). 

 

Description and Foreword: 4/10

Your description and foreword did a good job of not telling the reader much about the story but just by reading the foreword, it was TOO obvious that the girl was going to fall in love with him. I also, didn't like the way you wrote your foreword and description. Most fanfics I have read develops the characters a bit or describes the character's personality through their very short description of the story. It also, is written in third person which makes it more interesting as it doesn't give out a exact feeling of the character making the reader guess and check for themselves by reading more.

 

Characterization: 6/10

You did an exceptional job on developing and describing the characters. But what I didn't like was that your character's personality switched/changed too fast. For example, Kris was a known devil of the school and then in chapter 3 he suddenly is a kind, caring person. But I do have to admit you did a pretty good job in characterisation for Fengyin. Just make sure that next time you take more time in characterising characters.

Please Subscribe to read the full chapter