"Fake Confession"

Author: Aisyah98

Main Characters: Sehun and OC

Genre: Romance

Status: On-going

Description of Story:
You transfer to a new school and really can't forget your ex-boyfriend at old school that you should break up without your will because of his  family's problem.You really love him and don't want  look to another boy in your new school and make another boy look at you,because of that you make yourself looks like nerd with wearing spectacle.

Yeah,you still love your ex like a stupid that really hard to contact with.You sent text to him,but he not reply and not answers your call.You miss him.One day,your friend who is class assistant and one of Sehun's friend intoduced you to him.You just like "uh..okay..I see" but,your friend suddenly told him that you like him,Oh Sehun.You really mental breakdown for a moment.

The most 'good' part is he..

"I can't...I want to concentrate on my study"

You dumped.Hell you want to kick his .You do not like him or whatever though.

The worst thing,he have a crush on a girl number one in nation  and it be more complicated,you don't even like him and that's make you feel bad for make a person he have crush on  feel uneasy while you don't like him and can't explain it because no one could not understand and believe it.

Story Title: 2.5/5

Your title is very relevant to the plot/story. It tells the potential readers what the story is all about. Considering the oh-so-many stories here on aff, an author/writer has only seconds to capture a reader, and one of the factors that helps capture their attention is through the title. Why? Most readers here on AFF tend to search for potential stories through tags like romance, fantasy, action, etc. If a title catches their eye, they search for the graphics, which I will be tackling about later on. I have heard many people pass up a story because the title "sounded dumb" and they assumed they wouldn't like the tale, that's why it's important to think of a catchy and alluring title as much as possible.

On the bad side, well, "Fake Confession" is too overused. This title is too cliche, and when you search it up on AFF, lots of stories with nearly the same title, or even stories with the same title will pop up. You title did give a clue of something in the story, which is the 'confession'. It enabled me, as a reader. to understand a particular event in the story, giving me a gist of what's to happen later on, but I would prefer if you chose a more deep yet unique title. Sure the title is relevant in the story, but it was simple; too simple if you ask me. It kind of gave the whole story out already, since the title is very common as well as the idea, I assume that I already know what's to happen.

Graphics: 5/10

Your graphics are simple. The poster and the background matches each other, which is a good thing. The quote though, the "That fake confession slowly became true." It had a bigger font size than the title, which is a bit distracting since the first thing a reader must see on the poster is the title instead of the quote. The color too. I was expecting a somehow bright and cute poster, but yours was a bit brownish. It kind of gave me an angsty feeling because of the color scheme, but angst isn't one of your tags so I was confused. I've read the story until the fifth chapter, and I didn't find any angst parts. Her cries when she knew Suho cheated on her are not enough to be considered as angst, and an angst story should have angst scenes to be considered as "angst," so I think it's best to settle for a cute yet romance-themed poster. There are a lot of shops out there, but if the shop you requested beforehand says that you cannot request to another shop, then just request for another poster from them and request for a fluff/romance-kind of poster. Either way, I think you poster was simple and nice, but it could be better.

Description and Foreword: 3/10

Let's start with your description. First of all, I think you aimed for it to be a somewhat... poem? If it is, I think you failed. The grammar was a bit off too. I'm sorry if I sound harsh. but it was cringe-worthy for me. Description creates a vivid picture for the reader. Of course, that doesn’t mean you have to go into detail about everything in the story.  It simply means that you have to be prudent in knowing when it’s required and why. Yours was too redundant; the point was already understood, but you still elaborated it, maybe because you did aim for it to be a poem.

A great description helps the reader to build a fully formed picture in their mind’s eye; to understand what your character is going through and how the character sees his or her world.  It creates a sense of the whole scene. In your case, the girl's thoughts were spoken and came out understandable, since she was the one telling that "poem," right? Your description would have gained more attention if you fixed your grammar and add some more words, not redundant ones, but be mindful not to put a lot of information because that'll ruin the whole point of brief description.

In your description, she was relaying of the past, right? You should replace "Don't" with "Didn't." Why? Since she was relaying something she felt from the past, you should use past tense, and "Didn't" is in past tense while the other one is in present tense. Also, the line "a feeling that I could not tell," it would have made more sense if it was "I had a feeling I could not tell." If you read that part, it would be "But after that fake confession, I had a feeling I could not tell." Doesn't it sound better? A little tip though, try aligning that poem at the center. It would look more presentable than it was before.

Next issue would be the character chart. It would be best if you put a title at the top of it, like "Characters:" since it seems like you just put it there randomly. Personally, I'm 70-30 with you needing a character chart. You may need it, since this is a chaptered story and it may look more interesting and presentable if you have one, but at the same time, it's a bit obvious that they're the characters, so I feel like you don't need to put them anymore. The information you put under the pictures as well. It would ruin the surprise as it would be better if you introduced those scenes in the story itself, creating more anticipation for your readers.

Next issue would be the prolouge you put under the character chart. I think you should remove that. It somehow gave off the whole story. My anticipation decreased when I read this one. You even talked about her ex-boyfriend. It could be one of your assets in the story, as you may use a twist regarding that "ex-boyfriend." Those paragraphs have a lot of grammar mistakes as well, but I won't correct if for you since I'm really resolved in you removing it instead. If you're not planning to remove it though, place it in your foreword, since it is where you usually put prolouges.

Prologues are sometimes not appropriate for certain stories. It all depends on the first paragraph of your first chapter. Write the first paragraph. Does it sound like you're going on with the story too quickly? If that is the case, then your story probably does need a prologue. Perhaps writing about characters that will only be briefly mentioned in the story is your way to go. Prologues often do not include the main characters or any sidekicks the protagonist might have. They can feature the antagonists, minor villains, the guardian, allies of the heroes, or practically any other character. Sometimes, prologues don't even have to feature a character! They can illustrate a dramatic event vital to the story, such as a disaster that might have triggered the grand adventure for the heroes.

My last issue would be the spacing again. Why do you put a lot of spacing in the first place? The empty spaces are a waste, and it was a bit nerve-wracking. The space was only meant for the credit o