Author: kamishi

Main Characters: Jongin x Kyungsoo

Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, , Depression

Status: On-going

Description of Story:
People always say romance isn't perfect, but Kyungsoo had to sacrifice himself to learn the truth. After the relationship fell apart, the two people fell apart as well. One resorted to illegal things and the other resorted to other people. Neither were successful. Neither were happy.

Story Title: 2/5

To be completely honest, I actually didn't want to read the story because of the title. If I were just scrolling through stories to read, I would more than likely scroll past without second thought. The word is not only sort of uncommon but it doesn't really embody an interesting story. I do give you credit for picking something that is indeed unique because a lot of authors tend to use a lot of stereotypical titles. Something that can add just a little extra edge to your title is that if your aiming for a one word title, ask yourself if it would sound better with the word "The" in front of it because if I was scrolling and saw "The Minimalist", It would spark my interest just a bit more but at the same time also consider that using that word before the title also means that your story will focus around someone that keeps the story going and exciting. After reading, I see that there are two main characters that keep this story going so either making the title plural or adding "The" beforehand would probably help just a little. But like I said before, credit for thinking outside the box. (And there is a period after your title. Period don't belong at the end of a title.)

Appearance: 7/10

a. Poster and Background. 2/5

The poster has a really cool design so I do like that but at the same time, it doesn't spark interest. It does touch up on the focus of who the two main characters are but that's just about it. There is no title either which is actually really the main thing you need for a poster. The title needs to stick out on the poster. Even if someone thinks the title is boring, seeing it on a really cool poster can make it ten times better and you would have a better chance of someone clicking your story to check it out. 

b. Lay-out and Formatting. 5/5

Everything is pretty neat and it place so no real complaints from me here on this part. I could read it all pretty well. And there weren't line breakers thrown everywhere so I'm really glad I didn't run into that. Good job here. 

Description and Foreword: 7/10

Your first line is definitely an eye catcher I must admit. I like my descriptions short, sweet/spicy/special, and straight to the point. Shouldn't be more than a paragraph and a half. Maybe two paragraphs if you really need to but normally if you do it right, a paragraph should be just enough. Once you learn to attract your reader with fewer words, writing the foreword and the chapters and anything else of that matter will be a breeze. The second line is what threw me off a little though. You said the "Romance fell apart". I feel like that could've been worded a bit differently because it made me go back to the first line and really think about it. "Romance isn't perfect" is from the first line and to be honest, it isn't but I feel like after reading the few chapters that are up, romance is really not the word you should use for the description at all. It's not a bad description but it might make the reader retrace what they read which is what you don't want. You want them to be into what they read so much that they are itching to read that first chapter. I think either "relationships" or "love" would have been better in place of "romance." It may be cliche a little but it makes sense. Romance is associated with mostly feelings so saying romance isn't perfect is like saying that the feeling of romance isn't perfect, which doesn't really make sense. As for the third line, same thing. The wording could be tweaked a little. Try adding the word "while" to either the beginning or the middle to spice up the sentence instead of using the word "one" twice. The last line is perfect and I really liked it so nothing needs to be fixed with that. Even still, some readers might not look into it as much as I am but it is always good to be prepared. 

Character Development: 14/15

a. Unity of the Characters and Their Actions. 4/5

I like the characters but at certain points, I did notice that their actions kinda became the same. I felt like at certain points, they both could've been the same person because of their actions. You did well at making sure the reader understood who they were but sometimes I think their actions contradicted their personalities that were impressively detailed in the story. 

b. Evolution of Characters. 5/5

So far, I actually r