Calling for KpopotakuXD

"Mother!"

Author: KpopotakuXD

Main Characters: Infinite Woohyun and Myungsoo, f(x) Sulli, Exo Kai and singer Hwangbo

Genre: Action, Comedy, Romance, Thriller

Status: On-going

Description of Story:
How could one be normal?  Did being normal consist of a plain, boring life or did it mean more?  Woohyun was percieved as normal, but perception was not reality.  Who would have known a simpleton like him would have an unbelievable background?  
Woohyun was the child of a fugitive father who ran away with his family's money, and never returned.  Not only did it break his mother's heart, it ruined her soul.  Woohyun's mother worked like a slave, barely raising enough money to provide food and a warm house. Woohyun hated his father, and his relationship with his mother was not pleasant either. His life was already horrible, but in one day he realized it could be worse.  There was another addition to the abnormalities in Woohyun's life.
Where is my mom?
....

Note: I am a very honest person. Sometimes I do not even know that I am hurting someone but this is just how I talk. I apologize now for this review seem to be harsh. But do not let this review or my words to stop you from writing. You can still improve. Everyone can. I am even willing to help you if you want me to. For now, these are my honest words and I am really sorry if after reading this, you will be hurt.   Critique:

Story Title: 1/5

The title is not appealing in fact, it sounds childish. It is connected with your story though but still, I did not find it interesting.

 

Graphics: 9/10

The posters are engaging. These two tell me that there will be some drama and action going on in this story so good job to whoever had made these posters for you. I am kind of disappointed that you did not include BG for your story. The plain white background dos not complement your dark posters.

 

Description and Foreword: 5/10

I gave this section a low score since your description tells too much and by 'too much' I mean it is telling the summary of your story rather than pulling the readers in. There are just too many things going on in your description that I have lost my interest to read. The character chart in your foreword is just useless. Really. There is no need for that, it just takes too much space of your story.

 

Characterization: 6/10

The characters are generic and dull. There is nothing new to look forward. One of them is always happy and smiling; one is pretty and everyone seems to like her (she's kind of a mary-sue) one is cold etc. However, as the story goes on, there are some development. They are slowly coming out from their generic characterization. You are doing good. Keep it up.

 

Plot: 15/40

The plot, of course, is very unoriginal. You could have put some twist but you did not.

 

Consistency: 2/5

Sometimes the story is too fast. Sometimes it's too slow.

 

Readers' Response: 4/5

It seems that they like your story. Congratulatations!

 

Grammar and writing style: 5/10

I do apologize for giving you such a low mark but you have to learn more about English Grammar rules. Disclaimer: my mother language is not English but I do my best to study and master them. You should do the