Calling for KaiSooExoForever

"The Sacrifice"

Author: KaiSooExoForever

Main Characters: Do Kyungsoo, Kim Jongin, Jessica Jung, Kim Minseok

Genre: Angst, Gender Bending

Status: On-going

Description of Story:
“ We cannot beg someone to stay if they want to leave and be with someone else. We have to admit that love doesn't give us the license to own a person. This is what love means...Sacrifice ” The Sacrifice is the story of the sad life of Kyungsoo who was willing to let go of her loved ones for the sake of his happiness and tried to start another new story of her life.

    Critique:

Story Title

The idiom ‘Still waters run deep’ could considerably be the epitome of your title. It’s a simple, generic title if you look at it in face value. But if you look at it with depth, the title is emotionally beautiful. There’s no other titles that can replace your current title because it is that beautiful.

 

Graphics

The poster is conjures feelings of nostalgia and sentiment, which is suitable for a relatively angst and emotional story. The blending done with the characters gives the poster an overall soft feel. But I wouldn’t say the same for the background. Personally, the background is a little bit distracting. I would have preferred a solid color or blurred out background with textures and the title of your story. The background is too busy for me and I sometimes find myself looking at it mindlessly.

But overall, your poster and background suit the mood of your story. It’s a unique poster that completely belongs to the plot of the story. Kudos to the person who created your poster.

 

Description and Foreword

The description for your story conditions us and warns us that it will be an emotional roller coaster. The first half has just the right amount of information. The second half though was a little bit of a spoiler. I don’t usually like stories that introduce their characters on the first page. But in your case, it was alright as it gave us some light about Kyungsoo and a brief description of Gender Dysphoria.

But you revealed too much when you introduced Jongin and Jessica. It would have been much better if you just cut out the parts where you mention that they have an affair because you never directly mentioned anything about an affair in the first half of your description. Since you introduced what would happen in the first 10+ chapters or so, it wasn't that surprising or emotion-provoking anymore because of the fact that we already knew it was going to happen from the start.

I quite like a gut-wrenching, heart squeezing plot like this and the element of surprise and appropriate plot twists are some of the devices that make your type of plot work. But since the element of surprise got taken away from me, I was a little less emotionally affected by the story. Maybe a basic character introduction would be much better and let the story introduce the affair instead of your character descriptions. You would definitely get a more emotional response from readers and make your story less predictable.

 

Characterization

Your characters are well developed in the story. They had realistic feelings and didn’t make them unrealistic for the sake of story development or because a lot of readers want Jongin and Kyungsoo together again or anything of that sort. Your characters are perfectly fine and explained with great depth, making it easy to understand why this person decided to do this or why that person reacted that way.

 

Plot

Your plot is leaning a bit more to the serious side. It’s not everyday that I appreciate gender-bend themes but this story was quite alright. You have Kyungsoo that was emotionally scarred in the past and leans on Jongin as her pillar. And here you have Jongin who’s biggest desire is to start a family, which is something Kyungsoo has a hard time doing. There is a lot of potential for this plot to be explosive, anger-provoking and addicting. And yes, I did get angry at some parts of the story because of the fact your plot knows how to play with people’s emotions. It’s a really addicting plot that makes you want to read more.

In one section of your story, there was a part where Kyungsoo had surgery to strengthen her reproductive system. This area of the story showed lack of research and it put me off a little bit. It’s a minor problem but I couldn’t possibly let it go. Because of the fact your story leans towards the serious side, you have to be 100% sure that you are writing factually correct information. Even if you have the youngest of the readers reading your story or the most oblivious of the people, you need to have factually correct information or be more detailed. Having incorrect information or lack of elaboration can affect how realistic your plot is. Your story is set in the real world, therefore there is going to be a tendency for some people to judge how realistic your story is.

But other than that, the plot of your story is very unique, something I don’t usually come across and is very deep. I don’t read these types of stories everyday since they can become emotionally draining but as I mentioned earlier, your plot has the ability to make people want more.

 

Consistency

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