Author: CrossGenesis

Main Characters: EXO's Suho and Lay

Genre: Angst, Horror, Romance,

Status: Completed

Description of Story:
"If I can't have you here as a person...Then I'd rather have you as one of them"
And so He DID... And so He WAS... One of those ornaments
One of those Porcelain Figures
Alive yet Unmoving, Listening but NEVER Responding, Perfect yet Inanimate
"If you love me then you'd understand why
"If you even loved me then you would NEVER leave"

Story Title: 4/5

Your story title is okay, not very off-putting, but not very enticing as a lot of stories on AFF have such dark and cold titles as well. However, I like the relevance the title has to the story as it draws the link between porcelain dolls and the man characters.

Appearance: 4/10

a. Poster and Background. 3/5

The background is plain and simple, so I don’t particularly have a comment about that, but the poster could use more work. The poster is supposed to provide a general feel and context to the story in question, but while it provides the feel, it doesn’t appear to match with the story. At first glance, in fact, it appears that there are two Lays and twos Suhos, which isn’t the case actually. So I think that it can use more work for it to be more accurate!

b. Lay-out and Formatting. 1/5

Your lay-out and formatting can definitely be much neater. Perhaps you may think it looks cool to see the coloured words popping out from the black highlight, but with suddenly various fonts and alternating bright neon colours, it actually looks quite messy. Furthermore, the formatting is all over the place, with some words centered and some left aligned and right aligned. Due to the different fonts the highlights also have varying height perhaps this should be rectified as well. As someone who is quite sensitive to formatting, so perhaps you should change it.

Description and Foreword: 8/10

The main thing that puts people off about your description and foreword is probably the lay-out so, yeah. Otherwise, it’s quite interesting, with the quotes that introduce the readers to the plot instead of chunky paragraphs. The pictures in my opinion, are not needed, or swap them with pictures that are relevant (though I really appreciate Suho’s gif!).

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