Author: AshleyFang

Main Characters: Nam Woohyun and Kim Myungsoo

Genre: Comedy, Drama, Fluff, Romance, , Mpreg, Slight Angst, Obsession, Bromance

Status: On-going

Description of Story:
Woohyun had just divorced with his first husband, knowing that their marriage had failed miserably. Feeling ashamed of himself to what people said about him, he decided to go back to Korea for a new mission that is to find a new husband. Thus, his mother introduced him to her friend’s son that just graduated from his studies. What will Woohyun do to seduce his new husband?

Story Title: 3.5/5

'The Next Husband'. I can say that this title is a thriller. When I first saw this title and without looking at the genres you filled in I actually thought it is a horror-themed story. It gave me a feel that maybe the 'wife' is on some sort of a mission to kill. Given to what I've said earlier other readers might be mistaken. That is what rare and unique titles get. There are a lot of risks to be taken especially when no one is familiar. The title literally suits your plot but in my opinion it isn't that eye-catching kind of a title.

Appearance: 6/10

a. Poster and Background. 3/5

Your poster doesn't suit your genre. There are those flowery stuffs on the background and flower means 'purity' and your story has both boys starring and in a forbidden relationship and you even indicated in your genre that this story has a slight angst so mainly focus on making your story grasp the main idea. You should try Black and blue or any dark colors then do the same format make Myungsoo look like a dominant lover and make Woohyun somewhat vulnerable.

b. Lay-out and Formatting. 3/5

It is good that you Italicized the flashback parts that makes readers distinguish that you are rewinding some parts. One point missing because your font size is like what? 10, 11 or 12? It is much readable if you'll change it up until 16. And also you've put some parenthesis for the readers to be guided accordingly and I think you can just put some legends then just put their meanings at the end of the chapter. And also you missed paragraphs or a sentences in chapter 10,11. The font and the font size were different please take note of that.

Description and Foreword: 5/10

I'd like to advise you to minimize your description. It is well-written. Yes you've got it there but will readers read your description until the end? I mean a reader like me chooses to read description and sometimes the title when some of the words in the description seems to get me and catch my attention. Maybe just put all the lines together and avoid being all detailed and spill your plot. Make them feel the want to read it.

As for your foreword, You've indicated sneak peeks right? It didn't make any sense at all.This part is where you're going to be detailed. Instead of making your foreword look like an Acknowledgement part, be productive and spill some of the 'biggest events' that you consider as the main turner of your story then cut it to the revealing part and that will make you a 'teaser author'.

Character Development: 9.5/15

a. Unity of the Characters and Their Actions. 3/5

You're a great writer but you just need to have some guidance in minor parts and your story will be featured in no time. You didn't fail to bring out the softie 'Woohyun'. It didn't appear like he was just some childish freak but bringing out his parents and his whole actually helped in building up his character. And as for Myungsoo, his bad boyish type of attitude didn't appear like he was just another in town. With Sunggyu, you made him look natural. He was a badass kind of boy and when he goes on to getting Woohyun back, it added the spice. But you should've at least put a chapter that will serve as an introduction to readers because seriously speaking? I was lost when I started to read your chapter 3.

First both of their mothers were brought out and then there goes their love affair and I actually thought Jiyeon was only Myungsoo's sister you didn't put any hints and I just got to realize it as the story goes on. After that *poof* there goes Chanyeol who was captivated by Woohyun at first sight. The point is you should put emphasis on each of your characters you seem to have just let them by and go along with the flow. This spoiled your story. Please try to improve this it was confusing.

b. Evolution of Characters. 3/5

Please Subscribe to read the full chapter