☑ YouAreTheArtist
Mental Breakdown Reviews ★ (╥﹏╥) ★ ☰ ARCHIVES[CONTENTID2]Twelve Years Without Byun Baekhyun[/CONTENTID2]
[CONTENTID3]
Story Title: Twelve Years Without Byun Baekhyun
Author: YouAreTheArtist
Main Characters: Byun Baekhyun, Kim Hayoung (OC)
Genre: Romance, Schoollife
Status: On-going
Description of Story: My first one shot story featuring Baekhyun! During the story it features both Baekhyun's POV and the girl's POV.
CRITIQUE:
Story Title: 4/5
It is special because it has Baehyun’s name in it. It’s also very self-explanatory and it’s directly in touch with the story itself. However, you could’ve used something more eye-catching; some readers might find the title okay and click on it, but some wouldn’t because they already know what the story about from the title and they might not feel so much enthusiasm to read it.
Graphics: 2/2
Unfortunately, I can’t rate your poster or/and background because you don’t have! I know, maybe you’re thinking, “It’s just a one-shot, a good poster doesn’t matter that much.” But it does, girl! Every story, no matter how long or short it is, should have a mesmerizing poster and background, and optionally character chart, banner or a trailer. Good graphics may help your story get more readers because a beautiful looking stuff or art work most of time gets attention.
I’m giving you two points because you said this is your first one shot and it’s my way of saying “Good luck on writing more!”. But please, take time to request for a poster from shops for every story you write. It makes a difference.
Description and Foreword: 8/10
You don’t have a foreword, but I liked the way you had written a preview in the Description box. And it’s not a normal preview, but it’s actually a scene, and probably one of the most important scenes, because it shows the moment when Hayoung and Baekhyun separated as kids. I found it very cute.
Characterization: 5/10
You didn’t give details on their personalities (the one-shot was way too short, and only has once scene – the moment they meet again after twelve years) to make me understand or, at least, try to
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