[CONTENTID1]Archive: Review for jessie14[/CONTENTID1]

[CONTENTID2]Don't Let Me Go (Let The Tears Fall)[/CONTENTID2]

[CONTENTID3]

Story Title: Don't Let Me go (Let The Tears Fall)

Author: jessie14

Main Characters: Jeon Jeongkook, Park Jimin

Genre: Drama, Romance,

Status: Completed

Description of Story: Jeongkook is totally overjoyed when he and his hyung are reunited, until the ticking clock rings and pulls him back to reality. ‘Don’t Let Me Go (Let The Tears Fall)’ is a one-shot story about a boy’s pain after losing his beloved hyung, then being thrilled to be in his love’s arms again.

CRITIQUE:

Story Title: 5/5

Personally, I really like titles with brackets in it although I am not sure exactly why. I think capitalizing everything is playing it safe and it is a good way to go rather than lapslocking some and end up being grammatically wrong so it is a really nice start! I really like the fact that the title gives away enough to let the readers know that the story is sad, but at the same time does not give an idea about what the story is about in particular. I think it is a really great way to start your story.

Graphics: 10/10

I really do not think I should grade graphics because I am not a professional in the area, so since you have both a poster and a background, I am giving you a full mark!

Description and Foreword: 8/10

I am not a fan of using or seeing too many colors in a story, mainly because I personally think that it looks unprofessional and is a little distracting, especially if the colors make it hard to read. I usually like to keep everything black and simple. That may be just me, though, so I am not forcing you to change it or anything since the colors you used are still pretty much readable, although a little too light to my liking. Honestly, I like the content of both your description and foreword. It definitely makes me want to read more despite my tendency to stray away from angst. What I want to comment on is the fact that you seem to use some words in the wrong way. That aside, the fact there is no spacing in between each paragraphs makes it a little harder to read. Since you did not enable text selection, I will try rewrite everything here instead of correcting them,:

He blinked.

This wasn't real.

"Don't- Don't let me go, please," Jeongkook pleaded softly, not wanting to ever leave the warm embrace he indulged in.

"I won't." Yet. Jimin patted his back lightly. The younger breathed in slowly, feeling so calm and at ease; every moment felt like heaven. "But you have to know that when the time comes, I won't have any choice but to."

Jeongkook pushed himself off the bed and rested his weight on his arms, reacting strongly to the response he dreaded to hear. "No, that's not true! I'm here, aren't I? I can stay." He leaned down and hugged the person he loved to be beside, squeezing his torso as he laid his head on said person's covered stomach. "We can be together."

There was no reply and it made him frown. He lifted his head slowly and glanced into the eyes of his boyfriend he had missed for so long. "You... Don't believe in me, do you?" His heart shook—he was losing hope.

Jimin sat up, unwrapping the arms that were around him. He stared back deeply right into his lover's eyes, gently playing with his hair. He realized that it had grown much longer compared to when they first met.

"When our time is up, when all this is over..." He began, speaking with the softest voice that stirred Jeongkook's heart. The younger's