"Loving You (forever)"

Author: Lavendra

Main Characters: EXO's Chanyeol, Rina (OC)

Genre: Angst, Drama, Romance

Status: On-going

Description of Story:
Rina has been living a normal life as a florist until suddenly, she finds herself engaged to Chanyeol. Marriage is the last thing she had ever wanted, but she is stuck with no way out after being tricked by him.
 

Story Title: 2/5

Common and plain. I don’t understand the reason you put (forever) in bracelets. The title should never contain bracelets unless is a documentary book, and that rarely happens there too. It does not fit nor is relevant to the story, no matter in how many ways you looked at it. You should’ve chosen a better one, something eye catchy. 

Graphics: 7/10

Although it is beautiful, it’s too bright for the story. You put angst in the genres, and after reading, I honestly thought the poster and background should have a darker feeling to it. The trailer is also nicely done.

Description and Foreword: 9/10

Summed the whole idea in two sentences, grabbed my attention, and got the details I want, so good job! I also applaud you for putting that scene in the Foreword and gave information on the characters. I’ve seen a handful of writers who tend to directly write ‘X months ago’ without presenting the present time. Except for the grammatical mistakes, it was beautifully written, to sum all of my ideas.

Characterization: 7/10

Chanyeol is an and that’s all about him. Kidding. I understand his desperation and frustration of not wanting to marry other girl but to go at the point where he has to lure another girl to escape his own problems… he should be ashamed. I do like his cold character, so keep it up.

On the other hand, I can’t understand Rina. She’s a confusing character and maybe too emotive for my liking, especially since Chanyeol said that he ‘wants a girl whose not sensitive or overly emotional’ and thought Rina was the one, but nope, he was mistaken, at least for me, since it’s clear that Rina seems way too fragile and delicate. Also, you should work more on her character because she goes from opposite moods very easily – there is she, strong and straightforward, and in the next minute, she cries. I was especially annoyed by the moment she walked into Chanyeol’s office and was practically stepped on by him. I would’ve threw the flowers into his fac