[CONTENTID1]Archive: Review for Malfunction[/CONTENTID1]

[CONTENTID2]Through an Umbrella[/CONTENTID2]

[CONTENTID3]

Story Title: Through an Umbrella

Author: Malfunction

Main Characters: Kim Taeyeon (SNSD) and Kris Wu (EXO)

Genre: Romance

Status: Completed

Description of Story: A lonely man and a friendly girl turn an ordinary household object into an item with significant meaning in both of their lives.

 

 

 

CRITIQUE:

Story Title: 4.5/5

I found your title catchy and attractive to the eyes, except it might come off as a little too much on the ambiguous side, and that was why half of a point was taken off. It really does correlate to the plot of your story, and you just know it’s going to be an angst-y sort of story. 

 

Graphics: 5/10

Technically, you have a poster for your story – but not one including your main characters. Try and request from a shop for one; it might really give your readers more insight to your story. Believe it or not, if you have a well-made poster, it might possibly attract more readers to read your story: after all, who doesn’t love to look at a pretty poster? 

 

Description and Foreword: 9/10

I give you full points on your description, because it was just beautiful. I really liked it. My only negative comment is that you should try to decide on a past or present tense here – I saw sentences which did not have the same tenses. Be sure to correct out even the smallest of details – it really pays.

Example:
They end up communicating through an umbrella.
Both did not know that Kris’s act of aggression towards himself would trigger such a blossoming relationship as this. 

 

Characterization: 9/10

I think