Story Pick Up: 

Lady of Summer

Note:One Shot (Spoiler Alert)

Personally the title did not attract me, but all in all it was a great title for the story and fits the storyline/plot well. When I first noticed the title, I thought it would end up as being a cliche love story that takes place in summer or somewhat of the sense. But after reading the story, the story was all that was on my mind and I was no longer thinking about whether the title was pretty or was it cheeky clever.

However, I can say that for anyone that sees only the story title would not be impressed or tempted to click on the story. Titles are what lure readers in at first sight, but I do understand how and why the title would work. Even after the description it fitted nicely in with the title. 

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Character: (10/10)

What I love about the characters was the fact that you gave us in-depth insights on how one is before putting and bringing them together. As we have Miya, Summer, who is awfully a nice gal who is kind and caring and fit her season just beautifully. We also have Myungsoo, who's icy cold due to his loneliness yet is still considerate. Then after that we finally go into a one time dialogue moment where the two characters firstly met and could easily discuss and express their concerns for one another. Being the warmth she is, she was concerned about Myungsoo's lonliness. Meanwhile he was concerned about her being favored by everyone and thus had to take her away from her place for some time. 

There's not much to say but I'd say I believe the two main characters developed quite nicely. 

And usually in stories, readers would often beg for settings, but for this story I'm glad that both settings and characters were equally balanced. And even if the setting wasn't very detailed, the actions of the characters alone is worth being a cover up. 

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Originality: (10/10)

It often happens that a story would be written through the inspiration of a song and because of this very original story, I've given you a full grade. I believe this was very well thought out and very original, and indeed a refreshing idea. All in all it was very interesting to read about an one shot romance that was taken into a whole different level. 

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Story-line/Plot: (40/40)

I got to admit that though the story was quite predictable (because of the description), it still ended up with a very great plot and twist to end the short story. What I saw after reading the story was the short-lasted romance between Myungsoo and Miya, but who said anything about just romance between the two? The romance between the two seasons and the Memorians were just as beautifully presented (That was something that I took from the story xD). There was love for everyone and everything, including plants (when the summer drought was brought up) given by both Miya and the icy Myungsoo. Though Myungsoo didn't fully understand that he was of any helpful or useful, as a reader I saw that he was indeed a big part of the two. 

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Grammar/Errors: (23/25)

Honestly I wouldn't mistake you for a fluent English speaker and writer. Your English was near perfect! However the usages of big terms comes so often and suddenly that it could cause disturbance to readers who do not understand them. They'll end up with a dictionary in hand or always having to look up the words in order to understand what is being said. But that's not the crucial problem, instead it's the many misplacement and misuses of commas. I understand the more commas used in one sentence can and does create a more dramatic feel, even emotional. But there are rules when it comes to commas as well (no surprise, right?).  Anyway, I've provided/included some examples below. If not for the comma issue, I would have given you a full mark here :D

Original: It lied at the very corner, so close to the stars and the galaxies,  that people were afraid they would fall into the skies.

Suggestion:  It lied at the very corner, so close to the stars and the galaxies that people were afraid they would fall into the skies.

Comment: To put this sentence in a "proper" English style, we'll have to say that the commas placement here are incorrect. With two commas within one sentence (here) you're basically wanting to input extra 'information' within the closed commas. That is if the commas wasn't there then it would have been a full sentence (without the center part). So if the sentence doesn't run smoothly then the comma that were included and applied were simply misplaced. 

Original: Memorians were blessed with one gift: They had only two seasons, and those were the radiant season of Summer, and the bleak season of Winter. Every century, the old seasons wilted to dust, and two new individuals were chosen by fate to take their pedestal.

Suggestion: Memorians were blessed with one gift: they had only two seasons and those were the radiant season of Summer, and the bleak season of Winter. Every century, the old seasons wilted to dust and two new individuals were chosen by fate to take their pedestal.

Comment: I colored coded the term 'season' because it was used twice in a 'listing'. Some would prefer if it was just "the radiant season of Summer and bleak of Winter." But it's completely an idea that does not have to be taken into account. Anyway, the last sentence had the comma 'issue'. 

Otherwise the grammar, terminologies, and style used in this story was very well done. And I adore that you kept the use of language and style consistent throughout the whole chapter/story.

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Overall Enjoyment: (5/5)

I loved it a lot honestly. And though the story didn't surpass the three stories requrement to hit a 98.5% grade, I'd inform you that I would still be putting it up as the 4th story. It deserve it and is a great story to use as a model for writing/grammar wise. And I noticed this was for a contest so best of luck, I know you'll place first with this one! 

And sorry if my review wasn't to your satisfactory, I did this after work so I'm a bit tired >.< But anyway, thanks for the request! This story surely cheered me up after a long day at work :)

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Total Score (97.5/100)

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Bonus: *Your questions and focuses for me*

descriptiveness of the writings and story telling.

The descriptiveness of the story was more than necessary, it also deem as perfect story telling. The only problem was the use of 'here' in the story, around two were spotted.

Feel free to message me if you have any further questions.
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