The Crazy and The Insane - kukunoona
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KUKUNOONA
REQUEST ON: 11/19/15
REVIEWER: BLACKROSESTEARS
FINISHED ON: 11/29/15
SCORE: 96/100
TITLE: (10/10)
LOGICAL (3/3) - IT MAKES SENSE TOGETHER WITH THE PLOT REALLY WELL AND THE WHOLE ASYLUM THEME.
EYE-CATCHING (3/3) - IT IS A REALLY INTERESTING AND EYE-CATCHING TITLE. AFTER I READ IT, I WAS LOOKING FORWARD TO READ THE STORY.
ORIGINAL (4/4) - THERE ARE NO OTHER STORIES WITH SUCH A TITLE AND IT JUST HELPED YOURS EVEN MORE TO CATCH THE INTEREST OF PEOPLE.
STORY'S FOREWORD/DESCRIPTION (10/10)
STORY'S SUMMARY (5/5) - YOUR FOREWORD IS GOOD, IT DOESN'T REVEAL TOO MUCH OF THE PLOT ALREADY AND IT SOUNDS INTERESTING BUT AT THE SAME TIME IT IS ALSO FUNNY BECAUSE OF TAEYONGS WORDS AND SEULGIS COUNTERATTACK. I REALLY WANTED TO READ THE STORY RIGHT AWAY BECAUSE OF THAT AND BECAUSE IT SOUNDED LIKE AN REALLY INTERESTING AND ORIGINAL PLOT.
APPEARANCE (5/5) - OVERALL IT IS REALLY NEAT AND STRUCTURED, GOOD TO READ WITHOUT GETTING CONFUSED.
CHARACTERS/CASTS (9/10)
CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT (5/5) - BOTH SEULGI AND TAEYONG ARE CHARACTERS I COULDN'T UNDERSTAND AT FIRST WHY THEY ARE IN THE ASYLUM. THEY SEEMED LIKE THEY DON'T HAVE A "PROBLEM", THERE WAS NOTHING OFF WITH THEIR BEHAVIOR, NOT LIKE YERI WHO SEEMED LIKE HER MENTAL AGE WAS A BIT YOUNGER THAN HER ACTUAL AGE (THIS IS JUST MY SPECULATION). BUT AS TIME PASSED BY I UNDERSTOOD WHY THEY BOTH ARE THERE. THEY BOTH KILLED A PERSON BUT DIDN'T SHOW ANY REGRETS ABOUT IT, IT IS LIKE THEY CAN'T FEEL REGRET AT ALL. THEY SEEMED TO BE COLD HEARTED AND IN SEULGIS CASE SHE ALSO SEEMS TO BE A BIT OBSESSED WHEN IT COMES TO PEOPLE SHE LIKES AND CARES FOR BECAUSE OF THE WAY SHE REACTED AFTER SHE SEES YERI WITH TAEYONG, LIKE SHE IS AFRAID THAT YERI WILL TAKE HIM AWAY FROM HER.
AND I REALLY LIKED HOW YOU WROTE IT, IT WAS LIKE YOU COULD UNDERSTAND WHY THEY ACT THE WAY THEY DID. YOU COULD FEEL A CONNECTION BUT AT THE SAME TIME YOU COULDN'T UNDERSTAND THEM. IT WAS LIKE YOU WANTED TO MESS WITH THE MINDS OF YOUR READERS AND YOU DID A GOOD JOB WITH THAT.
CHARACTER'S RELATIONS (4/5) - I LIKE THE RELATIONS IN YOUR STORY AND THE INTERACTIONS, TALKS. THEY SEEM REALISTIC AND ARE NICE TO READ BUT SOMETIMES IT WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE TO SEE THE RELATION BETWEEN SEULGI AND TAEYONG GROW A BIT MORE, LIKE HOW THEY SLOWLY FALL FOR EACH OTHER AND HOW SEULGI GETS SLOWLY MORE AND MORE OBSESSED WITH TAEYONG. BESIDES THAT EVERYTHING WAS REALLY GOOD.
THE AUTHOR'S MINDSET (37/40)
LOGICALLY (10/10) - YOUR PLOT MAKES TOTALLY SENSE AND THERE ARE NO HOLES OR PARTS THAT ARE CONFUSING WHILE READING.
ORIGINALITY (10/10) - FOR ME IT WAS ORIGINAL BECAUSE OF THE ASYLUM. BUT ALSO THE REST WAS QUIET ORIGINAL BECAUSE I NEVER READ A STORY BEFORE WHERE TWO PEOPLE LIKE EACH OTHER BECAUSE OF REASONS LIKE THEY KILLED SOMEONE THE OTHER HATES.
TONE (5/5) - IT IS A RATHER DARK MOOD IN THE STORY BECAUSE OF THE ASYLUM AND THE FACT THAT THEY KILLED PEOPLE IS IMPORTANT TOO. BUT I LIKE THE WAY YOU DID IT BECAUSE IT FITTED THE SITUATIONS AND THE OVERALL PLOT REALLY WELL.
NARRATION (5/5) - THE NARRATION WAS GOOD TOO. NO OFTEN CHANGES OR CONFUSION WHILE READING THE STORY.
STORYLINE (7/10) - THE BEGINNING OF YOUR STORY WAS REALLY GOOD BECAUSE YOU STARTED TO EXPLAIN THE LIFE IN THE ASYLUM AT FIRST AND HOW EVERYTHING WORKS THERE WHICH WAS IMPORTANT FOR THE FUTURE PARTS OF THE STORY. FROM THE START I WAS ASKING MYSELF WHY SEULGI IS IN THE ASYLUM BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T SEEM LIKE A PERSON THAT HAS TO BE THERE. THEN THERE IS TAEYONGS FIRST APPEARANCE AND FROM THAT POINT ON SEULGI STARTS TO APPROACH THE OTHER. HERE IT WAS A BIT UNCLEAR TO ME WHY SHE DECIDED THAT SHE WANTS TO BE FRIENDS WITH HIM. WAS IT JUST BECAUSE HE LOOKS HOT IN HER EYES? MAYBE YOU COULD WRITE THAT OUT A BIT CLEARER.
THEN WE FIND OUT THAT SEULGI KILLED HER BOYFRIEND WHO HAD AN AFFAIR AND TAEYONG KILLED HIS GIRLFRIEND THAT WAS CHEATING ON HIM WITH SEULGIS BOYFRIEND. THIS COULD HAVE BEEN REALLY CONFUSING BUT YOU WERE ABLE TO EXPLAIN IT REALLY WELL.
THEN WE FIND OUT THAT SEULGI KILLED HER BOYFRIEND WHO HAD AN AFFAIR AND TAEYONG KILLED HIS GIRLFRIEND THAT WAS CHEATING ON HIM WITH SEULGIS BOYFRIEND. THIS COULD HAVE BEEN REALLY CONFUSING BUT YOU WERE ABLE TO EXPLAIN IT REALLY WELL.
AS I ALREADY WROTE ABOVE, IT WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE TO SEE A BIT MORE DETAILS ABOUT THE RELATION BETWEEN TAEYONG AND SEULGI BUT ALSO ABOUT JAEHYUN AND WENDY TO SEE WHY THEY ENDED UP KILLING THEM. BESIDES THAT I THINK YOU WRITING STYLE IS REALLY NICE TO READ AND THE FLOW OF THE STORY WAS OKAY FOR A ONE-SHOT.
PROPER USE OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE (25/25)
PROPER GRAMMAR/PUNCTUATION (10/10) - GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION WERE GOOD, I DIDN'T FIND ANY MAJOR MISTAKES.
TERMINOLOGY (5/5) - THE VOCABULARY IS ALSO VERY GOOD. THERE IS NO OVERUSE OF THE SAME PHRASES OR WORDS.
LANGUAGE BARRIER (10/10) - THERE IS ALSO NO OVERUSE OF THE KOREAN LANGUAGE.
REVIEWER'S ENJOYMENT (5/5)
OVERALL I ENJOYED READING YOUR STORY BECAUSE THE PLOT WAS FASCINATING ME. IT WAS INTERESTING TO READ FROM TWO PEOPLE IN AN ASYLUM BECAUSE IT IS NOT THE TYPICAL LOVE STORY. I ALSO LIKE YOUR WRITING STYLE.
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