Aphelion-fefedove

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*Characterization - You're characters when done well.Outstandingly realistic, it sure gave the vibe of how it should feel. Is an example of what we all feel deep insde,also knows as our fears and that so known as darkness in our hearts.
 
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fefedove
request on: 09/22/15
REVIEWER: eunriehyun
finished on: 09/27/15
score: 98/100
Title: (10/10)
LOGICAL (3/3) - the title ties in legitimately with the story and its plot. 
EYE-CATCHING (3/3) - the title was interesting, it did hook right away. Curiosity got the best of me.*sighs*
original (4/4) -Aphelion, is new and refreshing.As I said,it made me curious specially since you took every chance to related to every scene in the story, and it all just clicked with the dark world your characters lived in.
 
story's foreword/description (10/10)
story's summary (5/5) -IT only took that one sentence to tell the readers of the truth behind the beauty of having imagination.  
appearance (5/5) - It was well organized since you gave the hints of each main characters' roles, gave the warning and still with all the given information you were able to get the readers -myself included- curious about the story,and how it would end.
 
characters/casts (10/10)
character development (5/5) - From beginning to ending,Yifan wanted freedom because his life a useless piece of sh*t.Yixing the person that liked a bit of  romance/or being romantic  at first but after some chapters it change because he is more the guy with the innocent mask.
Luhan is an artist and expresses his feelings and his mind through his poems. They are his way to leave something behind after his death. Tao was their shadow and he continued to be until the end,which caused him... you know what.
character's relations (5/5) - Their interactions were realistic and believable,as the way closed friends would react ,although they WERE all broken in this story. 
 
the author's mindset (40/40)
THE STORY was unique from the beginning, i have never seen this kind of storyline before. It can get you very interested in the story, and at some point you can't get your eyes off of it.is that type of story that once you've read will hunt you for a while until another story takes its place. (See what did there?)
ANYWAYS,The whole setting was very interesting. College, where there are a lot of people, everything could happen... And you picked the years when the person is the most vulnerable. You thought this through. You put the effort and I was glad you pulled it of and turn it into this, quiet admirable. 
proper use of the english language (23/25)
proper grammar/punctuation (08/10) - there were a few grammar error,bUT those you can fix without a problem.
Ex. In chapter one- lived》lives 
Chapter two- tortured 》 torturers 
Chapter two-in 》 them
termonology (5/5) - The  vocabulary used was well expanded and easy to read.
language barrier (10/10) - I found no language barrier. 
 
Reviewer's enjoyment (5/5)
I enjoy it to the end. I'm a fan when it comes to this type of stories. I knew that Tao was going to die,I actually thought he was going to kill himself,but I'm pretty sure he was killed. Hehehe~ I loved the "so We whish on fallen angels",I truly love it and I thought it was creative, it was actually the first thing that captured my attention before I even read the first sentence.xD 
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Comments

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WooGyu_KyuSung_YooSu
#1
One more thing. I know the Description and the forward are super long. But I planned this story to be like a Novella/Soap Opera.
It may seem like I'm giving away to much in the Description and The Forward, but as you realize you might notice that I haven't.
There are three main parts to this story:
The Past-Childhood
The Past- Orphans/Teens
The Present- The main setting, in which the forward revealed nothing.

I'm an interactive author, meaning I ask questions at the end and leave hints here and there for the readers to try there best at guessing. (They become more invested in my story this way, lol)
WooGyu_KyuSung_YooSu
#2
-Username : WooGyu_KyuSung_YooSu
-Profile link : http://www.asianfanfics.com/profile/view/49463

- Story title : Love Me Right
- Story link : http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/976222/love-me-right-mpreg-hunhan-taoris-kaisoo-sulay-chanbaek-chenmin

-Genre : OT12, Angst, Mpreg, Fluff, Comedy, Growth, Friendship, Life, and "LEARNING TO LOVE"

- On-going | To be a long fic.

- Reviewer : KaihleeLo

- So The title of the fic is "Love Me Right", but it has nothing to do with the EXO song; even though some would just assume. The reason why I titled it 'Love Me Right' is because 6 of the main characters suffered in their childhood and eventually were orphaned. They don't know how to let themselves love. In particular, Luhan. As for the other 6 'Love' and 'Lust' are two different things.

- So before you read, I would like to point out, that the pacing of the story and the built up is exactly how I planned. I don't want to rush Romance because you don't 'fall in love' over night, and the characters need to mature. Also, there is a pattern to my chapters "The Past" chapters are essentially flashbacks. "The Present" is taking place now. For every 5 "The Present" chapters, it will be followed by 2 "The Past" chapters; Childhood/Teen years.

- I have a reader who offered to proofread my chapters since I had some typos, and I don't have the time to go back and fix them. "I always update between 12 am - 5 am, so that is the main reason". She is still editing the earlier chapters so please realize I am fixing the errors.


Oh gosh this was a lot. I'm sorry. I'm just really nervous, and I wanted to explain the above before you review.
-Tigress-
#3
Chapter 127: Hey can I have someone send me my review here so I can save it?
This archive is non-selectable so I can't save it myself.