Four Seasons - --SpringJelly

BLK's Review Shop ACHIEVE
--BLK'S--
--REVIEWS-
 
 
REMINDER
    ////////////
BONUS: I TRIED TO ANSWER EVERYTHING IN THE REVIEW. 
IF YOU STILL HAVE A QUESTION OR SOMETHING IS UNCLEAR, FEEL
FREE TO PM ME. AND I AM REALLY SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT. 
 
 
♦FEEL FREE TO MESSAGE US PERSONALLY WITH ANY CONCERNS. 
♦ PLEASE DON'T FORGET TO CREDIT OUR SHOP'S LOGO/BANNER IN YOUR STORY'S FOREWORD!
♦ THANK YOU FOR CHOOSING BLK
REVIEWS AND FOR YOUR PATIENCE! HOPE TO SEE YOU VISIT AGAIN.
 
 
--SPRINGJELLY
REQUEST ON: 7/31/16
REVIEWER: BLACKROSESTEARS
FINISHED ON: 9/4/16
SCORE: 98/100
TITLE: (8/10)
LOGICAL (3/3) - I CAN TOTALLY UNDERSTAND WHY YOU CHOSE THIS TITLE BECAUSE OF YOUR COMPARISONS WITH THE FOUR SEASONS IN THE STORY. 
EYE-CATCHING (2/3) - HONESTLY THE TITLE IS BEAUTIFUL AND EVERYTHING BUT IT DIDN'T REALLY CATCH MY ATTENTION BECAUSE I READ STORIES IN THE PAST THAT PLAYED WITH THE SEASONS TOO SO I HAD A PLOT IN MIND. 
ORIGINAL (3/4) - THERE WERE OTHER STORIES WITH THE SAME OR A SIMILAR TITLE WHICH MADE IT LESS ORIGINAL FOR ME. 
 
STORY'S FOREWORD/DESCRIPTION (10/10)
STORY'S SUMMARY (5/5) - I REALLY LIKED READING YOUR DESCRIPTION OF THE STORY BECAUSE IT WAS BEAUTIFUL WRITTEN. I REALLY LIKED HOW YOU WROTE ABOUT THE SEASONS AND HOW YOU WANT TO USE THEM IN THE STORY. I WAS LOOKING FORWARD TO READING YOUR ACTUAL STORY. 
APPEARANCE (5/5) - OVERALL YOUR FOREWORD LOOKS REALLY GOOD. IT IS EASY TO READ AND TO UNDERSTAND AND DOESN'T LOOK MESSY AT ALL. 
 
CHARACTERS/CASTS (10/10)
CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT (5/5) - THERE WAS NOT A HUGE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT BUT STILL YOU CHARACTERS ARE PEOPLE YOU CAN EASILY RELATE TO. ESPECIALLY TAEHYUNG BECAUSE WE SEE HOW HE LOVES HIS GIRLFRIEND AND TRIES TO BELIEVE IN HER AND HER LOVE FOR HIM UNTIL THE END. WE SEE HOW HIS TRUST STARTS TO CRUMBLE UNTIL HE LEARNS ABOUT THE TRUTH AND HOW IT IS HARD TO MOVE ON. IT MAKES YOU FEEL A CONNECTION TO HIM BECAUSE THOUGH YOU DON'T HAVE TO EXPERIENCE THE EXACT SAME SITUATION BUT STILL IF YOU EXPERIENCE A BREAK UP, YOU CAN RELATE TO HIM.  
CHARACTER'S RELATIONS (5/5) - JUST AS I WROTE ABOVE I REALLY LIKED HOW YOU DESCRIBED TAEHYUNG, I WAS ABLE TO SEE HOW MUCH HE LIKES HIS GIRLFRIEND WHO FAILS TO RETURN HIS AFFECTION. FOR HER, SHE SAYS IT IS NOT EASY TO BREAK UP WITH HIM SO SHE DOESN'T. FOR ME SHE WAS LIKE A CHARACTER THAT LIKES HOW SHE HAS TO GUYS WANTING HER AND THE ATTENTION SHE GETS OUT OF IT WITHOUT REALLY THINKING ABOUT HOW SHE HURTS ONE OF THEM. SHE COMES OFF A BIT CRUEL AT SOME TIMES THOUGH I DON'T WANT TO QUESTION THAT SHE CAN BE ALSO CUTE. 
 
THE AUTHOR'S MINDSET (40/40)
LOGICALLY (10/10) - THE STORY AS A WHOLE MADE SENSE FROM THE BEGINNING TO THE END AND I AM SURE THAT NOT ONLY ME IS ABLE TO RELATE TO THE PLOT AND TO TAEHYUNG. 
ORIGINALITY (10/10) THE STORYLINE IS NOT REALLY SOMETHING NEW BUT THE WAY YOU WRITE IT WAS ABLE TO MAKE IT ORIGINAL. THERE WAS NOT REALLY A TIME YOU THOUGHT THAT IT SOUNDS LIKE OTHER STORIES YOU READ BEFORE. 
TONE (5/5) - THE TONE ALWAYS FITS THE SITUATION TO THE POINT THAT WE CAN FEEL THE CONFUSION, HURT AND PARTLY ALSO THE LOVE OF TAEHYUNG FOR HIS GIRLFRIEND AND HOW HE HAS A HARD TIME MOVING ON FROM HER. 
NARRATION (5/5) - THE STORY WAS WRITTEN IN TAEHYUNG'S POV SO WE COULD FEEL A CONNECTION TO HIM. THERE WERE NO CHANGES THAT COULD HAVE BEEN CONFUSING.
STORYLINE (10/10) - I REALLY LIKE HOW YOU USED DETAILED DESCRIPTION OF TAEHYUNG AND HOW HE IS FEELING WITH THE TIME PASSING BY BECAUSE IT JUST DESCRIBES A SITUATION EVERYBODY COULD EXPERIENCE. LIKE THAT IT FELT MORE REAL FOR THE READER AND IT MADE IT EASIER TO PICTURE EVERYTHING TO A POINT WHILE READING. RIGHT FROM THE START WHEN YOU WROTE HOW SHE IS ALWAYS ON HER PHONE MADE ME WONDER WHETHER SHE HAS A SECRET OR IS CHEATING ON HIM BECAUSE THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN PRETTY OBVIOUS. SO HIS REACTIONS ARE SOMETHING I COULD UNDERSTAND, HOW HE WANTS TO HOLD ONTO THEIR LOVE AND HIS TRUST FOR HER BUT SLOWLY HAS TO ADMIT THAT SHE IS NOT THE PERSON HE KNOWS ANYMORE. SO I ALSO REALLY LIKED HOW YOU ENDED IT WITH TAEHYUNG STILL BEING HURT BECAUSE HE STILL LOVES HER EVEN AFTER EVERYTHING SHE DID CAUSE IT SHOWS THAT IT IS NOT EASY TO MOVE ON JUST LIKE THAT DESPITE EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED. ALSO, THERE WAS THIS REFERENCE TO "I NEED YOU" WHICH I REALLY LIKED BECAUSE I AM REALLY A FAN OF STORIES WITH SONG REFERENCES. 
 
PROPER USE OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE (25/25)
PROPER GRAMMAR/PUNCTUATION (10/10) - THERE WERE NO MAJOR MISTAKES THAT COULD HAVE BEEN DISTURBING WHILE READING YOUR STORY. 
TERMONOLOGY (5/5) - YOUR VOCABULARY WAS GOOD, YOU DIDN'T USE THE SAME WORDS OR PHRASES TOO OFTEN BUT VARIATIONS. 
LANGUAGE BARRIER (10/10) - I CAN'T REMEMBER THAT THERE WAS A USE OF KOREAN BUT IF THERE WAS THEN YOU DID A GOOD JOB THAT IT WAS NOT DISTURBING WHILE READING THE STORY. 
REVIEWER'S ENJOYMENT (5/5)
I REALLY ENJOYED READING YOUR STORY BECAUSE IT IS A SAD STORY, IT WAS NICE TO READ BECAUSE I KNOW THIS SITUATION IN A WAY AND KNOW HOW TAEHYUNG MUST BE FEELING. YOUR WRITING STYLE CAUGHT ME FROM THE BEGINNING TO THE END OF THE STORY THAT I READ WITHOUT TAKING BREAKS. 
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Comments

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WooGyu_KyuSung_YooSu
#1
One more thing. I know the Description and the forward are super long. But I planned this story to be like a Novella/Soap Opera.
It may seem like I'm giving away to much in the Description and The Forward, but as you realize you might notice that I haven't.
There are three main parts to this story:
The Past-Childhood
The Past- Orphans/Teens
The Present- The main setting, in which the forward revealed nothing.

I'm an interactive author, meaning I ask questions at the end and leave hints here and there for the readers to try there best at guessing. (They become more invested in my story this way, lol)
WooGyu_KyuSung_YooSu
#2
-Username : WooGyu_KyuSung_YooSu
-Profile link : http://www.asianfanfics.com/profile/view/49463

- Story title : Love Me Right
- Story link : http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/976222/love-me-right-mpreg-hunhan-taoris-kaisoo-sulay-chanbaek-chenmin

-Genre : OT12, Angst, Mpreg, Fluff, Comedy, Growth, Friendship, Life, and "LEARNING TO LOVE"

- On-going | To be a long fic.

- Reviewer : KaihleeLo

- So The title of the fic is "Love Me Right", but it has nothing to do with the EXO song; even though some would just assume. The reason why I titled it 'Love Me Right' is because 6 of the main characters suffered in their childhood and eventually were orphaned. They don't know how to let themselves love. In particular, Luhan. As for the other 6 'Love' and 'Lust' are two different things.

- So before you read, I would like to point out, that the pacing of the story and the built up is exactly how I planned. I don't want to rush Romance because you don't 'fall in love' over night, and the characters need to mature. Also, there is a pattern to my chapters "The Past" chapters are essentially flashbacks. "The Present" is taking place now. For every 5 "The Present" chapters, it will be followed by 2 "The Past" chapters; Childhood/Teen years.

- I have a reader who offered to proofread my chapters since I had some typos, and I don't have the time to go back and fix them. "I always update between 12 am - 5 am, so that is the main reason". She is still editing the earlier chapters so please realize I am fixing the errors.


Oh gosh this was a lot. I'm sorry. I'm just really nervous, and I wanted to explain the above before you review.
-Tigress-
#3
Chapter 127: Hey can I have someone send me my review here so I can save it?
This archive is non-selectable so I can't save it myself.