4 Worlds - 4 Soulmates - Dodo_Kyungsoo1
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DODOD_KYUNGSOO1
REQUEST ON: 12/15/15
REVIEWER: BLACKROSESTEARS
FINISHED ON: 2/12/15
SCORE: 92/100
TITLE: (10/10)
LOGICAL (3/3) - IT TOTALLY MAKES SENSE WHY YOU CHOSE THIS TITLE. THERE IS AN OBVIOUS CONNECTION BETWEEN THE TITLE AND THE PLOT.
EYE-CATCHING (3/3) - IT IS AN INTERESTING TITLE BECAUSE WE DON'T REALLY KNOW THE PLOT OF THE STORY AND HOW YOU WILL WORK ON IT. SO IT REALLY IS EYE-CATCHING.
ORIGINAL (4/4) - IT IS A REALLY ORIGINAL TITLE. I LOOKED IT UP AND COULDN'T FIND ANY OTHER STORIES WITH THE SAME OR A SIMILAR TITLE SO GOOD JOB HERE.
STORY'S FOREWORD/DESCRIPTION (10/10)
STORY'S SUMMARY (5/5) - YOUR SUMMARY OF THE PLOT SOUNDS REALLY INTERESTING AND MADE ME CURIOUS ABOUT THE ACTUAL STORY BECAUSE IT REMINDED ME OF AN ANIME I WATCHED IN THE PAST THAT HAD A SIMILAR PLOT SO I WANTED TO KNOW HOW YOU WILL DEAL WITH THIS KIND OF PLOT. IT DOESN'T REVEAL TOO MUCH, ONLY THAT THERE ARE FOUR MALES AND SHE CAN CHOOSE ONE.
ALSO NORMALLY I DON'T REALLY LIKE IT WHEN WE GET THE INTRODUCTION OF THE CHARACTERS BEFORE READING THE STORY BECAUSE I LIKE TO SEE IT MYSELF WHILE READING THE STORY BUT HERE IT IS ACTUALLY HELPFUL BECAUSE THERE ARE SO MANY CHARACTERS THAT I WAS AFRAID I COULD GET CONFUSED WHILE READING.
APPEARANCE (5/5) - IT LOOKS GOOD AND IS ORGANIZED. THERE IS NOTHING THAT COULD CONFUSE OR LOOKS MESSY HERE.
CHARACTERS/CASTS (8/10)
CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT (4/5) - YOUR CHARACTERS REALLY ARE SOMETHING, I WILL WRITE SOME WORDS ABOUT EACH OF THE ONES THAT APPEARED SO FAR.
SO HUANG MISA IS A CHARACTER I DON'T KNOW WHETHER I SHALL LIKE HER OR NOT BECAUSE AT FIRST I LIKED HOW SHE TOLD HER EX-BOYFRIEND HER OPINION AND WAS A STRONG WOMAN BUT LATER SHE STARTED TO FALL ON MY NERVES BECAUSE AS SOON AS SHE LEFT HER WORLD WITH LUHAN SHE STARTED TO COMPLAIN AND BECAME A BIT Y WHICH I REALLY DIDN'T LIKE AFTER SOME TIME BECAUSE HE WAS TRYING TO HELP HER AND ALL SHE COULD DO WAS ACTING LIKE A PRINCESS. THEN SHE TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT HIM AFTER SHE MET KRIS AND ALSO AT OTHER TIMES SHE WAS REALLY SELFISH AND DIDN'T THINK ABOUT OTHERS AND WHAT THEY LIKE SO I ACTUALLY STARTED TO DISLIKE HER AND UNDERSTAND WHY NO GUY WOULD LIKE TO STAY WITH HER. BUT THERE ARE ALSO TIMES SHE CAN BE NICE AND THE TOTAL OPPOSITE OF WHAT I WROTE ABOUT ABOVE BECAUSE SHE DOES SEEM TO CARE ABOUT HER SOUL MATES AND LUHAN BUT IT IS HARD FOR HER TO SHOW IT FROM TIME TO TIME.
FOR KRIS, HE IS ALSO THE TOTAL OPPOSITE OF MISAS NEGATIVE CHARACTER TRAITS BECAUSE HE REALLY CARES ABOUT HER A LOT AND LOVES HER AND SHOWS IT TO HER WHENEVER HE GETS THE CHANCE. HE WOULD DO EVERYTHING FOR HER WHICH COULD BE BAD AT TIMES BECAUSE THAT IS NOT LIKE A PERSON SHOULD BE. HE SHOULDN'T AGREE ON EVERYTHING WITH HER SO THERE BECAUSE AFTER A WHILE SUCH A RELATIONSHIP WOULD BE BORING.
LUHAN CARES, LIKE KRIS, A LOT ABOUT MISA AND HE TRIES TO UNDERSTAND HER. HE WAS NEVER ANGRY AT HER FOR COMPLAINING A LOT OR LEAVING HIM IN PRISON WHILE SHE HAD A GOOD LIFE. SOMETIMES I WAS UNSURE WHETHER HE LIKES MISA MORE THAN HE SHOULD OR NOT WHICH COULD BECOME A FUTURE PROBLEM.
SO HUANG MISA IS A CHARACTER I DON'T KNOW WHETHER I SHALL LIKE HER OR NOT BECAUSE AT FIRST I LIKED HOW SHE TOLD HER EX-BOYFRIEND HER OPINION AND WAS A STRONG WOMAN BUT LATER SHE STARTED TO FALL ON MY NERVES BECAUSE AS SOON AS SHE LEFT HER WORLD WITH LUHAN SHE STARTED TO COMPLAIN AND BECAME A BIT Y WHICH I REALLY DIDN'T LIKE AFTER SOME TIME BECAUSE HE WAS TRYING TO HELP HER AND ALL SHE COULD DO WAS ACTING LIKE A PRINCESS. THEN SHE TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT HIM AFTER SHE MET KRIS AND ALSO AT OTHER TIMES SHE WAS REALLY SELFISH AND DIDN'T THINK ABOUT OTHERS AND WHAT THEY LIKE SO I ACTUALLY STARTED TO DISLIKE HER AND UNDERSTAND WHY NO GUY WOULD LIKE TO STAY WITH HER. BUT THERE ARE ALSO TIMES SHE CAN BE NICE AND THE TOTAL OPPOSITE OF WHAT I WROTE ABOUT ABOVE BECAUSE SHE DOES SEEM TO CARE ABOUT HER SOUL MATES AND LUHAN BUT IT IS HARD FOR HER TO SHOW IT FROM TIME TO TIME.
FOR KRIS, HE IS ALSO THE TOTAL OPPOSITE OF MISAS NEGATIVE CHARACTER TRAITS BECAUSE HE REALLY CARES ABOUT HER A LOT AND LOVES HER AND SHOWS IT TO HER WHENEVER HE GETS THE CHANCE. HE WOULD DO EVERYTHING FOR HER WHICH COULD BE BAD AT TIMES BECAUSE THAT IS NOT LIKE A PERSON SHOULD BE. HE SHOULDN'T AGREE ON EVERYTHING WITH HER SO THERE BECAUSE AFTER A WHILE SUCH A RELATIONSHIP WOULD BE BORING.
LUHAN CARES, LIKE KRIS, A LOT ABOUT MISA AND HE TRIES TO UNDERSTAND HER. HE WAS NEVER ANGRY AT HER FOR COMPLAINING A LOT OR LEAVING HIM IN PRISON WHILE SHE HAD A GOOD LIFE. SOMETIMES I WAS UNSURE WHETHER HE LIKES MISA MORE THAN HE SHOULD OR NOT WHICH COULD BECOME A FUTURE PROBLEM.
CHARACTER'S RELATIONS (4/5) - THE INTERACTIONS BETWEEN YOUR CHARACTERS ARE REALISTIC SO FAR THOUGH SOMETIMES THE CONVERSATIONS ARE A BIT BORING, BETWEEN MISA AND LUHAN BECAUSE THEY REALLY TALK A LOT ABOUT THE SOUL MATE THING WHICH IS SOMETHING I WILL WRITE MORE ABOUT LATER.
BUT BESIDES THAT EVERYTHING ELSE WAS GOOD SO FAR.
BUT BESIDES THAT EVERYTHING ELSE WAS GOOD SO FAR.
THE AUTHOR'S MINDSET (37/40)
LOGICALLY (10/10) - SO FAR EVERYTHING MAKES SENSE AND THERE ARE NO PARTS THAT COULD BE CONFUSING OR SHOULD BE DESCRIBED BETTER.
ORIGINALITY (10/10) - THIS IS ACTUALLY THE FIRST TIME I READ A STORY WITH THIS STORYLINE ON AFF SO IT WAS SOMETHING NEW FOR ME.
TONE (5/5) - THE TONE FITS THE SITUATIONS OF THE STORY AND HOW YOUR CHARACTERS ACT. IT IS GOOD TO READ TOO AND IT FITS THE POVS TOO.
NARRATION (5/5) - YOU USE THE DIFFERENT POVS OF YOUR CHARACTERS REALLY WELL. THERE ARE NO CONFUSIONS OR SUDDEN CHANGES IF YOU ARE WRITING IN ONE POV SO THIS IS REALLY GOOD.
STORYLINE (7/10) - ALL IN ALL IT IS A NICE PLOT BUT THERE WERE SOME THINGS I REALIZED WHILE READING THAT COULD HAVE BEEN BETTER.
I REALLY LIKE HOW YOU START WITH MISA AND BARO BREAKING UP AND HOW SHE IS ANGRY AND THEY ARGUE THOUGH SHE DOES SOUND LIKE A MAD WOMAN IT WAS NICE TO SEE THAT SHE DOESN'T LET OTHERS TREAT HER BAD JUST LIKE BARO DID.
THEN WE SEE HER LIFE BESIDES EVERYTHING THAT HAS TO DO SOMETHING WITH LOVE LIKE HER WORK AND HER FRIEND DARA.
YOU SHOW HOW LUHAN GETS THIS TASK TO HELP WITH HER SOUL MATE.
THAT WAS SOMETHING I REALLY LIKED BECAUSE WE COULD SEE HOW EVERYTHING TURNED OUT TO HOW THE STORY CONTINUES.
THEN MISA GOES ON A DATE WITH HER FRIEND AND CO-WORKER XIUMIN WHO LIKES HER BUT SHE DOESN'T LIKE HER BACK AT ALL.
BUT MISA LEAVES WITH LUHAN FOR HER THREE SOUL MATES.
HERE I HAVE TO ADMIT IT GOT A BIT BORING FOR ME BECAUSE THEY ARRIVE IN THE WORLD OF VAMPIRES AND FIND HER SOUL MATE KRIS PRETTY FAST.
EVERYTHING TURNS OUT TO PERFECT, MISA AND KRIS MEET FAST AND FALL IN LOVE AND EVERYTHING SEEMS TO BE PERFECT. THE PLOT IS REALLY LINEAR AND ONLY ABOUT FINDING MISAS SOUL MATE THE WHOLE TIME WHICH MADE IT BORING AT SOME POINT SO I WOULD SUGGEST TO WRITE SOME PARTS IN THE FUTURE CHAPTERS WHERE NOT EVERYTHING IS THAT EASY AND PRETTY PERFECT FROM THE START TO MAKE IT MORE INTERESTING.
IT GOT A BIT BETTER WHEN KRIS FATHER TOLD HIM TO NOT MARRY MISA BECAUSE HIS MOTHER DIED AFTER GIVING BIRTH TO HIM AND THE SAME COULD HAPPEN TO HER AND ALSO THE WHOLE PLOT WITH SOMEONE ATTACKING KRIS AND THE PERSON THAT LOOKS LIKE MR.HONG WHO IS ACTUALLY DEAD WAS INTERESTING BUT YOU DIDN'T REALLY WORK THIS OUT SO I HOPE THAT YOU WILL IN THE FUTURE CHAPTERS BECAUSE THAT WAS REALLY INTERESTING AND COULD BE CONTINUED.
I CAN'T SAY MUCH ABOUT THE SECOND WORLD SO FAR BUT I LIKE THAT RIGHT NOW IT SEEMS LIKE IT WON'T BE AS EASY TO GET CLOSER TO HER SOUL MATE AS IT WAS WITH KRIS.
I REALLY LIKE HOW YOU START WITH MISA AND BARO BREAKING UP AND HOW SHE IS ANGRY AND THEY ARGUE THOUGH SHE DOES SOUND LIKE A MAD WOMAN IT WAS NICE TO SEE THAT SHE DOESN'T LET OTHERS TREAT HER BAD JUST LIKE BARO DID.
THEN WE SEE HER LIFE BESIDES EVERYTHING THAT HAS TO DO SOMETHING WITH LOVE LIKE HER WORK AND HER FRIEND DARA.
YOU SHOW HOW LUHAN GETS THIS TASK TO HELP WITH HER SOUL MATE.
THAT WAS SOMETHING I REALLY LIKED BECAUSE WE COULD SEE HOW EVERYTHING TURNED OUT TO HOW THE STORY CONTINUES.
THEN MISA GOES ON A DATE WITH HER FRIEND AND CO-WORKER XIUMIN WHO LIKES HER BUT SHE DOESN'T LIKE HER BACK AT ALL.
BUT MISA LEAVES WITH LUHAN FOR HER THREE SOUL MATES.
HERE I HAVE TO ADMIT IT GOT A BIT BORING FOR ME BECAUSE THEY ARRIVE IN THE WORLD OF VAMPIRES AND FIND HER SOUL MATE KRIS PRETTY FAST.
EVERYTHING TURNS OUT TO PERFECT, MISA AND KRIS MEET FAST AND FALL IN LOVE AND EVERYTHING SEEMS TO BE PERFECT. THE PLOT IS REALLY LINEAR AND ONLY ABOUT FINDING MISAS SOUL MATE THE WHOLE TIME WHICH MADE IT BORING AT SOME POINT SO I WOULD SUGGEST TO WRITE SOME PARTS IN THE FUTURE CHAPTERS WHERE NOT EVERYTHING IS THAT EASY AND PRETTY PERFECT FROM THE START TO MAKE IT MORE INTERESTING.
IT GOT A BIT BETTER WHEN KRIS FATHER TOLD HIM TO NOT MARRY MISA BECAUSE HIS MOTHER DIED AFTER GIVING BIRTH TO HIM AND THE SAME COULD HAPPEN TO HER AND ALSO THE WHOLE PLOT WITH SOMEONE ATTACKING KRIS AND THE PERSON THAT LOOKS LIKE MR.HONG WHO IS ACTUALLY DEAD WAS INTERESTING BUT YOU DIDN'T REALLY WORK THIS OUT SO I HOPE THAT YOU WILL IN THE FUTURE CHAPTERS BECAUSE THAT WAS REALLY INTERESTING AND COULD BE CONTINUED.
I CAN'T SAY MUCH ABOUT THE SECOND WORLD SO FAR BUT I LIKE THAT RIGHT NOW IT SEEMS LIKE IT WON'T BE AS EASY TO GET CLOSER TO HER SOUL MATE AS IT WAS WITH KRIS.
PROPER USE OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE (24/25)
PROPER GRAMMAR/PUNCTUATION (10/10) - THERE WERE NO MAJOR MISTAKES THAT COULD BE DISTURBING WHILE READING.
TERMINOLOGY (4/5) - YOUR VOCABULARY WAS GOOD TOO BUT SOMETIMES YOU TALK ABOUT SOUL MATES AND USE THIS WORD SO MAYBE YOU COULD USE OTHER WORDS OR SOMETHING TO DESCRIBE WHAT YOU MEAN INSTEAD OF SOUL MATE.
LANGUAGE BARRIER (10/10) - THERE WAS NO OVERUSE OF THE KOREAN LANGUAGE.
REVIEWER'S ENJOYMENT (3/5)
JUST LIKE I WROTE ABOVE I LIKED YOUR START BUT THEN GOT KIND OF BORED WHEN THE WHOLE ARC WITH KRIS STARTED BECAUSE IT WAS JUST TOO PERFECT AND NOTHING ELSE HAPPENED BUT MISA FINDING HER SOUL MATE AND LIVE WITH HIM. SO IT TOOK ME A WHILE TO FINISH READING THE STORY. BESIDES THAT MISAS CHARACTER ALSO TOOK IS PART IN IT BECAUSE I REALLY STARTED TO DISLIKE HER AT SOME POINT.
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