Title(3/5)

The title isn’t really eye-catching because it’s a bit bland and well, straightforward. I think you could have gone with something more dramatic.

Poster & Background & Trailer(7/10)

There isn’t a trailer so no points are deducted; I’m not exactly sure if your poster is a poster because it’s more of an edit and the title isn’t shown on the edit/poster or any of the other things. It’s a really beautiful edit and I love how Onew/Jinki looks like a vampire— but I think it’s best if you have a poster poster rather than an edit-poster.

Description & Foreword(10/10)

The description and the foreword combined were both amazingly written and organized— I felt a sense of anticipation while reading the… well actually, while reading both the description and foreword!

Plot(8/10)

The plot— to be honest, I don’t really know if I grasped onto what this story was about. All I can summarize is that it’s about a girl named Minjeong and a vampire guy named Onew/Jinki. Then I guess, she decides to “run away” with him to his place and she meets a guy named Key and other people. We find out that she’s a past lover of Jinki— and I don’t really want to spoil the rest but I’m not totally sure where you’re going with this. Now, normally when I say that, it isn’t a good thing but in this case— it is. I’m curious to what you have in mind for the future chapters because I’m not sure what the full story to this story is about.

Originality(10/10)

Full points for originality— though I have to admit that I was feeling a bit of a Twilight feel to this story.

Flow(4/5)

The flow— I feel like it lacked some but it was going at a good speed. I just think maybe you should make the of the story come faster than it is at the moment. I don’t feel that excitement to want to continue reading.

Grammar/Punctuation/Spelling/Vocabulary(30/30)

I don’t have any complaints. Your grammar, punctuations, spelling and vocabulary were all well-used and greatly appreciated!

Writing Style(10/10)

I envy your writing style— this is a style I want to try to duplicate but also at the same time, add some of my own flair into the style. I love love love it when a writer can describe things so well and visually— it makes me so happy and I just can’t help but smile.

Overall Enjoyment(7/10)

My overall enjoyment— this story was very enjoyable but due to my lack of really knowing who Onew and/or Key, I wasn’t able to enjoy it as much but I’m not going to take points off for that. I think if there just a bit more umph in this fanfic, I would have ignored the fact that I didn’t know who Onew was and enjoyed it some more.

I’m not totally sure if I would come back to read this story because— my personal reason— I can’t imagine the characters i.e Onew and Key. But other than that, it’s going to have to depend if I decide to come back and read this. It’s a wonderful fic though so good luck with your future chapters!

Total – 89/100

reviewer: vangbby
to meeghan94: omg meghan don't beat me up after this ;___; ilu okay...... lol