Dance with Me

Title (2/5)

The title does fit the story because it’s centered around the two character’s dancing, but it’s a little dull.
When choosing a title you want to use something that’s captivating and gets a reader’s attention hooked.

Poster/Background/Trailer (4/10)

The poster is okay, but it’s really plain. There’s just a picture of the Jieun and then of Kai without any
fancy details that make it look interesting.

Description & Foreword (5/10)

You use the word spark too much in the description and you have too many sentences when trying to
explain about the spark.

Everything else, you tried to make it look too fancy and it doesn’t look good with the rest of the story.

Plot (5/10)

There’s not much I can actually grade you on since there’s only a few chapters.

Originality (5/10)

Same goes for this, you don’t have much so I can’t exactly give you a proper grade.

Flow (5/5)

The story is set to a perfect pace.

Grammar/Punctuation/Spelling/Vocabulary (30/30)

No errors stood out while reading and I don’t generally grade with a ballpoint pen unless someone is
extremely terrible at writing, so you got full marks.

Writing Style (7/10)

You have a very nice writing style. Good dialogue, great grammar and punctuation marks, and everything
seems to be written correctly. The only advice I give you is to work on the emotional connection in the
story. It has a lot of potential, but I think you should focus stronger on areas of thoughts, feelings, and

actions.

Overall Enjoyment (0/10)

Not interested in EXO stories. But I must say, I’m so glad that you didn’t use a picture of IU and use her
as an OC character with a different name. So many people have been doing that lately, it’s getting rather
old.

Anyways, sorry for the lack of actual reviewing, but since the story only has a few chapters there is not
much I can really say. I suggest you submit it for another review once you have more chapters written or
it’s complete.
 

Total Score: 68/100%

reviewed by: peacelovehugs