I thought I'm already done with you?

Title (2/5)
It caught my attention, but it isn’t capitalized correctly. Also, the sentence structure is incorrect. There’s no need for the question mark because the sentence isn’t a question. It’s a statement.

It should be, I Thought I Was Already Done with You.

Poster & Background & Trailer (9/10)
The poster was okay. It’s kind of plain and the background doesn’t really match. The clouds are cute, though. You have no trailer, but I’m not going to take points off for that because trailers are optional. The posters for the chapters were much better.

Description & Foreword (4/10)
Your description is simple and it basically explains the entire story. It isn’t bad, but you only had a couple mistakes in it.

You wrote: You meet your ex-husband again, after 4 years. Who would think that your life would go upside down again?

Correction: You meet your ex-husband again after four years. Who would have thought that your life would turn upside down again?

In the first sentence, the comma isn’t needed. The comma is used to separate an independent clause from another independent clause using a coordinating conjunction. Also, you always spell out numbers, unless it’s 100 and above. In the second sentence, your sentence isn’t necessarily wrong but the sentence structure is a tad bit confusing. All you would need to do is reword it.

Although it was a bit confusing, your foreword was okay. I'll skipped the character profiles for now.

You wrote: What if FATE gives you another chance to renew your past life?

Ever since you married Lee Junho because of your parents, your life became miserable as hell. Having a personal contract with him that caused you to file the divorce papers.

4 years later, you have a good job as secretary of a world renowned company. When one day you bumped into him and turned your life into a roller coaster all over again. Moreover, a third wheel comes in. What to do now?!?

You would think an arrange marriage would really right? You would also think that the couple wouldn't like each other at first but then falls in love with each other later, right? Not in my case. I was forced to marry Junho, but had enough with him. 4 years after my divorce with him, I'm living like an average person. Work. Eat. Play. Until, I met HIM again. I THOUGHT I'M ALREADY DONE WITH YOU?

Correction: What if fate gave you another chance to renew your past life?

Your life has been miserable ever since your parents made you marry Lee Junho. You filed for divorce not too long after.

Four years later, you’re a secretary for a world renowned company. One day, you bumped into Junho and your life turned into another roller coaster again. However, a third person comes into the equation. What should you do now?

You would think an arrange marriage would , right? You would also think that a couple who didn’t like each other would fall in love with one another later, right? Not in my case. I was force to marry Junho, but I had enough of him. Four years after my divorce with him, I’ve lived an average life. All I did was work, eat, and play until I met him again. I thought I was already done with you.

Your sentence ‘Having a personal contract…’ wasn’t a complete sentence. Anyway, your main problem seems to be sentence structure. Your sentences make somewhat sense, but they aren’t worded correctly and they’re not complete sentences which will confuse the readers.

Now as for the character profiles, I’m highly against them. I feel that they give away the story. Majority of the time, readers actually don’t really pay much attention to the profiles. And the few that do completely forget what they just read the minute they clicked next.

A simple character chart would be sufficient. You’ll be explaining the character’s background and personalities throughout the story, so there’s really no point for the profiles.

You also suddenly switched from second POV to first POV within the foreword. Don’t do that. That confuses and throws off the readers.

Plot (5/10)
It was very predictable and unoriginal. I have yet to read any plot events in this story so far that’s not in any others that i've read.

Originality (5/10)
Not original at all. There are several stories on AFF with this storyline. I’ve read plenty of them. Plus, I didn’t really see anything in your story that stood out or made it different from the others.

Flow (2/5)
Your flow is fast. One chapter they meet and find out they’re getting married. That’s okay. The next chapter they’re getting their rings. Fine, but in the third chapter is the wedding. Why so soon? I would have liked a few normal chapters like the oc going to her job and such before reading about the wedding. By chapter five, it’s already four years later. You could’ve made those five chapters into at least ten if you took the time to describe your story and such.

Grammar/Punctuation/Spelling/Vocabulary (20/30)
Since you have ten chapters, I’m only going to point out the mistakes in chapter one.

You wrote: …I thought high school is hard but college is the .

Correction: I thought high school was hard, but college is a .

Verbal confusion for the first part of the sentence, for the second, it was just confusing in general.

You wrote: After getting my diploma, pictures and all that stuff my family went to a fancy restaurant to eat.

Correction: After getting my diploma, pictures and all that stuff, my family went to a fancy restaurant to eat.

You’re missing a comma that needs to separate the first part of the sentence, which is a dependent clause.

You wrote: "We have solemnly promised my best friend that whenever we have a child in the opposite gender; we will get them married after they graduate" Mom said.

Correction: "We have solemnly promised my best friend that whenever we have a child in the opposite gender, we will get them married after they graduate," Mom said.

The semicolon is basically a fancy period. Wherever you use a semicolon, you can use a period there as well. In this situation, where you placed the semicolon was wrong. A comma should have gone there instead. For the ending of the conversation, you’re missing a comma before the end of the quotation. You do this periodically throughout the story.

You wrote: Did I hear that right? Get married? Do I even have a choice here?

Since this is in the oc’s POV, there’s no need to make her thoughts in italics because this is from her viewpoint. Everything she is thinking and seeing is from her view point. No need to italicize the thoughts. Same thing goes for all the other povs by Sandeul and Junho,

You wrote: Junho so that's his name...*smirks*

Once again you italicize the oc’s thoughts while it’s from her POV. As for the *smirk*, unnecessary. Just say, I smirked. It’s unprofessional to write and explain the characters emotions like that.

 Your writing itself isn’t bad. Your spelling is good and vocabulary is good, but your main problem is grammar and sentence structure. I suggest getting a good English speaking friend to edit you chapters.

Writing Style (7/10)
Your writing’s neat and readable, but your characterization is not really good.

Junho keeps mentioning that the oc looks like a nerd, but in all the pictures that were used to represent the oc in the posters did not make her look a nerd. You really need to work on describing things. I had no clue what the wedding dress looked like. And even though there’s a picture of the characters in the posters, it would have still been nice if you described their looks.

Overall Enjoyment (0/10)
I honestly didn’t enjoy this. I’ve seen and read so many stories like this that they’re starting to get old and boring. It’s rare when I read a fic with this non-original plot line and still catches my attention.

If I wasn’t reviewing this story, I would have probably stopped reading this by chapter 3. It  just didn’t catch my attention or enjoyment whatsoever.

Total - 54/100

reviewer: Kakurine039
Reviewer's Note: I’m sorry if the score is low. And I hope I wasn’t too harsh. Hopefully this will help you improve your writing and stories. Don’t give up!

(Yay for a new reviewer! ^^)