On the Brink of Insanity

Title (4/5)

The title is nice but I don’t know if I would call it captivating; doesn’t really catch my attention much if I were to browse around for a fanfic. I like how it reflects off of your story though.

Poster & Background & Trailer (2/10)

The poster—I don’t like it. The way it’s blended and stuff is really nice but it looks… off. I can’t see how it resembles your story and the font used just doesn’t do it. Now, I see that you have another poster too; the other poster is actually pretty nice but it’s also pretty plain. If I were to look at that poster without knowing what the story was about, I would be confused as to why there was a little girl on the poster. What did she have to do with the story? Unless this was another one of those you-are-my-dad-and-I-am-your-daughter stories then that would make sense, but it’s not.

The background looks like it was part of the poster—like the background of the poster. It’s dark and angst-y but I don’t like how there are words on it. It distracts me from reading the actual story.

The trailer… well, let’s just say I’ve seen better. I didn’t understand what I was watching and I didn’t feel any anticipation for the story while watching it. It was just a video filled with clips of Kibum and the other characers.

Description & Foreword (4/10)

The description—I like it. It gives us a view into what’s going to happen in the story and it gives some background info about Kibum.

The foreword… I am not a big fan of it. I mean, I like it that you added excerpts into the foreword but it would have been better if you left out the word “excerpt” and the “Chapter 10… 30… 37” and so on. I don’t want to know that you’re giving me an excerpt. Also, if you’re going to add in an excerpt, just choose one. I don’t find it necessary to write 5 excerpts in the foreword—you need to write one that defines your story. I feel like the excerpts you added were all random; I didn’t see how it was relevant.

I think you should keep chapter 61 as the excerpt and erase the others. It gives us more background to what you’re writing rather than writing 5 other ones that just informs us about Kibum’s relationship with the other characters. We’re going to learn about the other characters in the story anyways.

Plot (7/10)

Definitely an interesting plot—but I don’t think I was really into it. Like, I didn’t understand the first chapter when Kibum was dreaming about some little girl. I thought that was his daughter who got taken away from him, but it turns out that she was his sister and she got murdered—something I wasn’t expecting.

Originality (10/10)

Definitely original!

Flow (3/5)

The flow was okay; some parts were a bit boring and some were interesting. I couldn’t fully grasp onto the of this story though; could be because this story is still on-going but there are 70+ chapters and I would have expected the to be at around chapter 20, or something.

Grammar/Punctuation/Spelling/Vocabulary (30/30)

Everything was used perfectly and beautifully!

Writing Style (10/10)

I definitely love your writing style!

Overall Enjoyment (5/10)

Well, like I said in the plot, I couldn’t get into the story. It was probably because this is one of the longest story I’ve had to review, but I feel like if you have a long-chaptered story, you should be able to capture the attention of a reader. I had to force myself to keep reading the story and I couldn’t wait to finish it. Not that it’s a bad thing—because it isn’t— I just didn’t feel much anticipation.

But anyways, good luck with your future chapters!

Total – 75/100

Reviewer: vangbby