November 23, 2017

So there’s this boy and the way he laughs makes me smile, and that way he talks gives me butterflies and just everything about him makes me happy, I love him. A real and ideal man takes care of his children without anybody needing to tell him he needs to take care of them. Any fool can be a father, but it takes a real man to be a Dad.

It’s been months since our lives changed. Having a new baby in the house is really a challenge not only for me but for my husband. I’ve experienced how to be a full time mum and I swear! It can really test you emotionally, physically and mentally, I’m just lucky coz I’ve got a very helpful team behind me.

Three months ago, G-dragon and I had this huge “cheating” issue and it almost ended our marriage. Yes, I’m still in fear up till now because I’m not sure when that will return or if she will ever show up again (I’m praying that she will just vanish). My husband and I had this silent war but it didn’t last long coz we just can’t take ignoring each other. It made me realize that I really can’t live without him and my love for him is just too strong to even brush off for a second.

I’d be leaving for Busan today coz I have this three day seminar for the magazine. Railey and Daryl will come but I’m really sad because I can’t take my kids with me. I came back to work a month ago and I’m under a hectic schedule once again and although I know that this will affect my job as a mum, I just want to give it a try and if I find it really hard to juggle, I might consider quitting my job.

“WAAAHHH!!!WAAAAHHH!!!”

Oh gosh! Here goes the crying again and it really can wake my senses in a snap. Well, we transferred Gabriella in our room for us to monitor her well. G-dragon and I have this shifts on who will get up to feed her or change her diaper. He’s really learning so fast and he can carry Gabriella without fear already. On the other hand, Isabella is sleeping with us as well for she’s jealous of her sister. In short, the four of us are sleeping in one room and it is really sweet.

“Babe” I shook G-dragon telling him to get up and cradle Gabriella.

It’s still super early, the sun hasn’t even risen yet and I only had an hour sleep. Well, we’re both tired but I’m much more tired than him coz the moment I went home from work, I immediately started my work here at home as a mum and a wife.

The good thing about my husband is that he knows when to complain and when to just obey. He stood up right away and checked on his daughter who is crying loudly. The moment he cradled her, she stopped from crying and I sat up as well and watched my husband do his thing.

“Babe? Are you OK…can you handle it?” I asked and he took a sit beside me with our daughter in his arms.

“I guess I can…she’s wide awake babe…I don’t think she’ll sleep right away” he answered and I looked at our little angel.

“Oh gosh…I guess it’s another sleepless night for me…give her to me so that you can go back to sleep” I said.

“No…you sleep and I’ll be the one taking care of her…babe…look at you…you’re so drained already” he said and I kissed him.

“But you’re tired as well and you still have rehearsals tomorrow…you can’t show up with dark eye circles…the boys might think that I’m making you suffer here at home” I joked and he gave out a laugh.

“No…I’m fine…you go back to sleep now coz you’re going to leave early right?” he reminded me and I sighed.

“I hate it! I don’t even want to go” I said and he smiled at me.

“But you have to…don’t worry…the girls and I will be fine” he assured and I kissed him again.

I’m thankful that he’s still supporting my decision to continue work even if we already have two kids, we still have little arguments about it though but it will always ends with him letting me continue work. I promised him that I’ll stop working very soon and he’s holding on to that promise so tight.

“Mum…I want to sleep there” Isabella sat up from her little bed beside ours and climbed up our bed.

This is life! These are the sweet moments of life and I don’t care if our privacy is being invaded by our kids.

“Babe…once she’s asleep you can place her down already…Love you” I said and he smiled at me.

“Love you too” he replied.

As I drift off to sleep, I can’t help but smile because I’m really loving our life now. It’s been turning out so well and smooth.

I woke up when I felt Isabella got up and started jumping up and down on the bed. She is really a good sleep disturber and she can wake us up in a snap too, like her sister.

“Mum! Dad! Wake up!” Isabella shouted.

“Dad!”

“Mum!”

Ok. I know that I have to get up and this is really making me crazy!

“Baby girl…good morning!” I said and catch her.

“Good morning!” she said and hugged me by the neck.

“Don’t wake dad up yet coz he is really tired from taking care of Gabriella” I said and she looked at her dad and hugged him.

“Is Gabriella already awake mum?” she asked and I got up from bed to check.

One thing that I’ve noticed is that G-dragon and our daughters all have many things in common. Isabella has the same personality like her dad and also the same fashion style but when it comes to sleeping, I have to give it to Gabriella, she is a heavy sleeper like G-dragon.

“She’s still sleeping baby girl” I said and she looked at her as well.

“Mum…why is Gabriella crying always?” she asked while playing with a stuffed animal that she got from her sisters crib.

“Because that’s her way of talking to us…she cries when she’s hungry or whenever we need to change her diaper” I answered.

“I want to change her diaper!” she said and I laughed.

“Really?” I asked and she nods.

“Well….you can help mum and dad someday” I said and she jumped up and down in excitement.

Isabella is still dealing with some issues when it comes to her sister. She still gets jealous and there are times that she wants our attention all by herself. G-dragon and I are trying so hard to be fair with our daughters and so far, we’re doing a great job.

“C’mon! Wanna help mum cook breakfast?” I asked and she nods excitedly.

Of course, our breakfast will be our family’s favorite morning combo (pancake and sausage). Isabella already knows what ingredient comes first and when it’s already cooked for she helps me everyday.

The moment we’re done cooking, I went to our room to wake G-dragon up. I know that I shouldn’t disturb him from his sleep but I want to eat breakfast with them today for I will be missing it for three days.

“Babe…breakfast’s ready” I sit next to him and shook his shoulder.

“mmmmm”

“Babe…I’ll be leaving in three hours and I want to see you awake when I leave” I said and I heard him chuckle.

“Now I don’t want you to leave” he said lazily and I smirked.

“Get up now…the food’s gonna get cold…Isabella can’t wait to munch them” I said and he laughed.

“Is Gabriella awake now?” he asked and I shook my head.

“Good…she slept so late awhile ago” he said and I kissed him on the cheek.

“Love you…wash up then after that…. go straight to the dining area” I said and went off.

I love being a wife and a mum. When I was young, I always tell myself that once I get married and have kids, I’ll make sure that I’ll get helpers to move around the house so that I will not have to do chores and babysitting but now, I am the one who is telling G-dragon not to get any helpers for I am enjoying all the work here in the house.

The moment I went out of the room, I heard Isabella laughing while playing with Gaho. She’s wearing this huge glasses (I don’t know where it came from) and keeps on making faces on Gaho but of course, the big old buddy isn’t even reacting. I laughed upon seeing that and took a picture.