Title: Break My Rules
Author: hunhan5
Characters: Sehun and Luhan
Genre: fluff, romance, angst
Category: 
Status: Completed (4 Chap)
Description: Luhan has rules to keep from being noticed. He has no friends to keep from being hurt. And he has no secrets that he wants to stay as they are. Then Sehun comes along and breaks all of that.

Title (10/10):
The title is the story! So yes, it does fit your story perfectly! The meaning of the title is everything that the story wants to tell you. It definitely draws the readers their attention to start reading your story. It could be that the title already has been used somewhere else on AFF- i don't know and I don't care to be honest. But it didn't bother me one bit! I'm sold! :)

Description & Foreword (10/10):
Your description and foreword does give the reader a taste of what's coming. I do like how you keep it very simple without much of explanation and even than, it's just enough. It definitely triggers the readers attention and curiosity to start reading your story and to want to know more about it.

Graphics (9/10): 
The poster - Well.. it does actually fits the story, because it gives you the feeling of being a light story but at the other hand, you may sense that something is about to happen. I'm not going to spoil anything. But yes both the poster and the background fits the story.

Character Development (9/10):
You did a very good job on portraying the characters in a very realistic with yet each with their own flaws and sometimes secrets. As I don't want to spoiler anything about your story, there is a certain twist into your story. That's all I'm going to say, as I want to encourage the readers to absolutely start reading your story. It's so beautiful!

Appearance (9/10):
Your font that you used it large enough to read your story. The story is well structured and quite easy to follow. Although it may appear that you wrote in large blocks of text, it doesn't really bother me that much. You can still follow the storyline, which is the most important.

Originality & Plot (8/10):
Your story doesn't sound cliché, it has a nice ring to it (figure of speaking ;)) I must be honest, I couldn't predict the ending and it hit like a wreckingball. I loved your story! It is indeed angsty but at the same time so fluffy (It's so fluffy I'm going to die! ^^) Which for some reason made me like the story even more. Because it might appear a heavy story with lot of emotions, which it is but you managed to keep it on a normal level because you added the fluffiness to it.

Flow (8/10):
Your story flows smoothly and ends .. Well, I ain't going to tell you! :) You have to read it yourself. It doesn't go choppy or anything, just smoothly. As for the continuation of the story, it goes rather slowly at first to come to a certain point and then it fastens his pace.

Writing (8/10):
Your ideas are well conveyed in your story. You know want you want to write about and that's what you did! ;) * GOOD JOB! * You write in a clear language, with that I mean that it's easy to understand and enjoyable to read your story. As I'm an addicted reader, I could follow the story in my head like a movie and I loved the movie/story I saw and read. So, thumbs up for that! ;)

Grammar & Spelling (8/10):
As I don't know if English is your first language, I must say you didn't make that many mistakes. It could be rather some typos that really big mistakes. I would say minor mistakes, but than again it didn't bother me that I couldn't read on or that your story became choppy. Here are the very minor mistakes I stumbled upon while reading your story:

Chpt 1

It bothered him and first but he's used to it now.
It bothered him at first but he's used to it now.

Chpt 2


Thunder roared, making the soaked one slowly glance up and with that let the rain hit his face which of cause made him need to squint and bring his hand up just in time to see lightning paint over the clouds above before more thundder could be heard.

Thunder roared, making the soaked one slowly glance up and with that let the rain hit his face which ofcourse made him need to squint..

Having to intension of going home any time soon and ..
Having no intension of going home any time soon and..

He got too used to Sehun always being there even though he know's..
He got too used to Sehun always being there even though he knows..

Chpt 3

He got to close.
He got too close.

Socializing wasn't his ting..
Socializing wasn't his thing..



So that's all the little mistakes I could find. I hope I didn't offend you in any way right now. I just want to help you out to improve everything.

General Enjoyment (10/10):
HUNHAN FEELS!! I think this says enough already.. I loved this story actually, as you maybe already have noticed, I'm also a HUNHAN shipper! They are more than adorable and I love them! I love how Sehun gets Luhan to open up to him and off course the way he uses to do so. I could squeeze them both! I will certainly continue reading stories of you. Cause well, who doesn't love those two cuties together? ^^ kekekek..

Total score: 89/100
Reviewer: StephLovesKCulture
Reviewed on: 28/08/2014
Comments and thoughts: As stated in the General Enjoyment, I loved it! I ship HUNHAN and I will definitely read more of your stories. Do come and request more, if you like! ;)


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