B#5 | Perdition | dhaatk
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Title
Author
Characters
Category
Genre
Status
Perdition
dhaatk
Kim Jaejoong and Jung Yunho
(BxB) but more like implied rather than direct
Tragedy, Angst, Horror, Mystery
One-Shot
Description
Jaejoong falls in love for a first time but he's not exactly human and the story mostly deals with his experience of being in love
Right after deciding to end his current life in four days, Kim Jaejoong finds a new personal assistant. It happens to be Jung Yunho. The man intimidates Jaejoong but they end up together. Kim Jaejoong is not exactly human and falls in love for the first time.
Title
The title fits the story with its deeper meaning at the end, it draws readers in because it sounds fascinating, and it catches attention easily because it's only one word -> perfect.
Descr.&Forew.
The description looked pretty fine, but "The man intimidates Jaejoong but they end up together." tells a lot about the story, not that that has to be something bad, but it sounds so neutral, so unaffected... - and maybe it tells a bit much about the story. Like Jaejoong falling in love doesn't have to mean he'll end up with Yunho, and even if so, there can be so much more before they'll end up together so this end is not sure and that's why I maybe wouldn't tell the readers about it. Knowing how the story is going to end, of course it might be important that they end up together, but this can still come as an unannounced surprise to the reader, but if you really want to tell the readers in the description, maybe change how it's formulated a bit so it doesn't sound so neutral anymore - just my opinion.
The definition of perdition however was a great idea in my opinion to emphasize the meaning of the word, and its relation to the story.
Graphics
The colours of the poster fit the story perfectly, black and white, just exactly what I'd associate with the story because it's not a happy love story but a dark story - and the poster looks really cool too.
Char. Dev.
Jaejoong's character is portrayed really realistic and he also develops a lot in the story, which I think is great, though he suddenly managed to be able to develop feelings? He lived many thousands of years, and the only emotions he knew were boredom and anger, and then there's Yunho, and he feels love in a few months. Can be possible of course, but maybe a bit fast... Though I can oversee that because Jaejoong was a really well developed character in so many aspects that he was realistic, just maybe Yunho is a bit strange - why did he follow Jaejoong to his house the first day they met? And he never dares to say anything "bad" to Jaejoong, he always obeys to everything what seems a bit uncommon to me. But in general, you did a good job with the characters, and Jaejoong was really interesting.
Appearance
Nice font, easy to read, well structured text - perfect, what else to say?
Orgin.&Plot
I haven't read a story with a plot like this yet, and it's definitely anything but cliche so it was a really interesting read. Also that kind of plot twist at the end (though it had to happen earlier or later) took me by surprise so it had that unpredictable element to it that makes it special.
Flow
The flow was perfect in the beginning, when Jaejoong wanted to have a new assistant, but when he asks Yunho to come home with him the first day they met, that was unexpected because they just met after all. But okay, that can be considered Jaejoong's character because well, he's not human after all so he might as well rush things a bit here. How they suddenly got together was described with a few sentences what was not much, or at least that was how it seemed like, and then all of a sudden Yunho died. Now that was a surprise because I didn't expect it to happen from the storyline, but also because I didn't expect it to happen so soon - they just got together and a few sentences later Yunho dies. End of the story. Maybe too abrupt in my opinion...
Writing
Your writing is really nice, I like the words you use to describe everything, and it was really enjoyable to read
Gramm.&Spel.
Grammar and spelling are perfect, I didn't notice any mistakes (or they hid well enough).
Gen.Enjoym.
I really liked you didn't make this story have a happy end as in Jaejoong somehow becomes human or Yunho somehow becomes immortal because that would have been an unrealistic and forced happy end and I really dislike these endings. The end was really nice however, with a deep meaning, and the whole plot was really unique!
Title : 10/10
Description & Foreword: 7/10
Graphics: 9/10
Character Development: 8/10
Appearance : 10/10
Originality & Plot: 10/10
Flow: 6/10
Writing: 10/10
Grammar & Spelling: 10/10
General Enjoyment: 8,5/10
88,5 / 100
Reviewer: MikuJae
date : 14 / 03 / 2015
CREDITS :
Credits to MikuJae [MJ] @ Steph's Bookclub Review Shop ©
COMMENTS / Thoughts & REMINDER
Comments & thoughts
Awesome and unique yunjae oneshot, just maybe a bit short, but definitely worth reading!
REMINDER
+Comment if you saw this review
+Don't forget to add proper credits with the link back to the shop!
Comments