B#5 | His Favorite Dongsaeng | jovayuyu
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Title
Author
Characters
Category
Genre
Status
His Favorite Dongsaeng
jovayuyu
BTS J-hope and Jimin
, Angst (kinda), Rated
One-Shot
Description
I am his favorite dongsaeng.
The younger lad that he loves dearly.
By the word dearly, it meant all his bullying.
But I like it though,
Because he's also my favorite hyung.
Never have I known why.
Title
The title is perfect for the story and it isn't very common. It's an interesting title and makes you wonder what the story is about even though it gives a loving feel.
Descr.&Forew.
Your description is interesting and helps me understand their relationship. I like it because it makes you wonder why his hyung is like this to him.
Graphics
Well there isn't a poster but there was a photo in the chapter. Maybe try getting a poster, it makes the story more fun ^^
SIDENOTE: If you want a poster,background or something else made, we have do have a sister Graphic shop
*WF Graphics*
We have also other excellent Graphic Shops in our affliates. Please make sure to check them out.
Char. Dev.
There isn't much need for development in a one shot but Jimin and J-hope's relationship changed and they did get closer.
Appearance
The size wasn't too big nor too small, and the font wasn't a crazy theme. It was very easy to read.
Orgin.&Plot
The story isn't too deep but I haven't read any others like that. The plot was easy to follow
Flow
The flow of the story is nice and you don't really skip around, but when you do, it is smooth with symbols to show that it's a new scene. But I think there were a few places where you didn't need a change in scene.
Writing
You used some pretty good descriptive words and made the scenes pretty easy to visualize. The writing was nice and easy to read.
Gramm.&Spel.
You did pretty well but there were places where you needed different endings on words or you needed to change a word. Or there were some places where you were in need of a word but didn't have it.
Here are a few examples;
Example 1:"We had a second eye contact and it just made something..."
Explanation You need to put 'of' in between 'second' and 'eye'.
Example 2: "What I am thinking...",
Explanation you need to switch 'am' and 'I'.
I don't know if English is your second language or not but maybe try having a beta reader :)
Gen.Enjoym.
I truly like this story!^^ If you just fix the grammatical problems, I know that many others will enjoy it as much as I did :)
Title : 10/10
Description & Foreword: 9/10
Graphics: 3/10
Character Development: 6/10
Appearance : 10/10
Originality & Plot: 6/10
Flow: 7/10
Writing: 8/10
Grammar & Spelling: 5/10
General Enjoyment: 8/10
72 / 100
Reviewer: Kpop_addict4ever
date : 12 / 03 / 2015
CREDITS :
Credits to Kpop_addict4ever [KA4E] @ Steph's Bookclub Review Shop ©
COMMENTS / Thoughts & REMINDER
Comments & thoughts
This story has potential so just fix some of the grammar and maybe get a poster. I know you can do it! I'm rooting for you! ^^
REMINDER
+Comment if you saw this review
+Don't forget to add proper credits with the link back to the shop!
Comments