July 28

I don’t know the real meaning of love. But, whenever I hear his voice, I can feel my heart skip a beat. When we are together, it feels like I’m a part of some fairytale. I don’t have words to describe what I feel for him. I fall deeper in his love with every passing day. Every moment I spend with him, feels like a dream. Who needs superheroes and romantic novels to fantasize when I have him to make my fantasies a reality?

My life is really written in a random way, full of irony and crazy things, but I live well with it because I’m having fun and I’m so used to it. I was reminded of a lot of things while staring at my husband’s face while he sleeps. There’s this flash back of my single life and a recap of what happened during my dating days with Jiyong. If you’re going to think of it, a lot of things really happened. I’ve undergone a drastic change and my life totally turned three hundred sixty degrees after meeting my husband.

I was just a fan thirteen years ago. A fan whose wildest dream is to just see Big Bang in person, a fan who loves G-dragon and has never thought that one day their paths would cross. I believe in fairytales and my only wish is to have my own story, it doesn’t have to have talking rats, birds making a gown, a pumpkin turned into a beautiful ride, a glass slipper and a fairy godmother. All I need is a prince charming that will pull me out of my boring world and lead me to the wild. He doesn’t even have to be riding a white horse, he can just be in a public train or in my case, inside a company. My life and Jiyong’s are really different and at one point in our relationship, we cannot make them meet in between. He has a high status while I’m just a writer who is making a noise behind her articles. I’m not even expecting anything good to happen in Korea before, but destiny played its game on me in full swing and I’m lucky that I was chosen to be played at.

Thirteen years ago, I don’t even know who I really was. I am drowning myself with work and the word “enjoyment” never rang a bell on me. I isolated myself from all he hubbubs of this world and I think, I’m the only person who is under a routine in young age while some of the people live there’s randomly. My only source of happiness is my addiction to K-pop and even if the people around me are saying that I’m not fit to be a fan girl, I don’t care about them at all. Then this girl decided to get out of her shell and try her luck in a foreign land, there she met cool and wonderful people, her dream was made a reality when she saw her most loved boy band and her ideal guy. Then fate brought them together, they fell deeply in love and next thing they know it, they can’t live without each other already. The boring girl became an outgoing girl, but she still has a lot of inhibitions and limitations. The guy really tried his best to get his girl going, he made her experience what life really is about and he succeeded. He made her see the world in a different perspective, that it doesn’t revolve in the four corners of her house and office and that a lot of wonderful things are waiting for her to be seen. He turned her life more realistic, so far from the perfect life that she’s used to, and she openly embraced it. They had problems here and there, a lot of people are blocking their way to happiness and some even made their lives a living hell, but in the end, their love for each other prevailed and life became sweet and tame already. Of course, there are bumps and rocky roads on the way, but they were able to handle all of them even if sometimes their tires are already flat and their bodies already have dents and scratches. Their story can be called a fairytale, but they are still so far from that happy ever after.

“I’m already melting” Jiyong said, snapping me back to reality.

OK. I know that I’ve been day-dreaming while looking at him and it’s really freaky. My thoughts ate my sanity and in all fairness to it, I’ve enjoyed all the flash backs that it showed me.

“You’re already awake?” I asked and he wrapped his arm around my waist with his head resting on my chest.

“Who wouldn’t be awake when you can feel your wife’s heavy stares on you” he hugged me tightly and I chuckled.

“Go back to sleep then…I won’t look at you anymore” I said while playing with his hair.

He crawled on top of me in a swift move and looked deep in my eyes. My breathing went abnormal and I feel like it’s our first time to look at each other deeply.

“Jiyong…what’s this? A staring game? First one to laugh will be the loser?” I asked and he didn’t even budge.

I can see love and total admiration in his eyes, but there’s also pain in it. I know that we’ve gone through a lot these past few weeks and things got a little twisted, that it pained and nearly shattered us.

“Thirteen years of being with you is really wonderful and beautiful…. and looking at you deeply is really overwhelming…your eyes are telling me things that you have never said before and it’s just so amazing” he said all of a sudden, breaking the silence.

“What can you see?” I asked seriously while his arms.

“I can see your pain…the wounds that I’ve given you all these years….you are scared….you are scared that things will never go back to normal again…and most of all…I can see love….you are touching my heart in a way that no one can ever do…you are a warm person babe….that even heavy challenges cannot make you cold…the wonderful woman that I saw thirteen years ago is still there and I’m really happy because of that” he answered and I wrapped my arms around his neck while tears are pooling in my eyes.

“Babe…I’m still the girl that you have loved before….I may not be as innocent and restrained….for I am now a bit carefree and outgoing…but still…that girl who you met thirteen years ago and this girl in front of you now …still have the same heart…it still beats one name and it’s loving only one person…and that is you…and it will never EVER change” I told him with tears falling down already as he kiss my forehead.

That moment is really random and I have never seen it coming. Starting the day with sincere and full of love words is really great and now, I can say that this sudden honeymoon will really help us bring our old us back.

“So…do you have any plans for us…or are we going to plan things just now?” I asked while hugging him tightly.

“I do have some plans....and you can change it if you want…but first…we should eat….I’m starving” he said and I chuckled.

“OK” I sat up and grabbed the phone.

“Who are you going to call?” he asked.

“Room service? Why? Do you want to eat outside?” I asked and he looked at me suspiciously.

“What?” I asked, feeling a little conscious.

“Aigoo…you really want to lock us here? Huh?” he asked and I rolled my eyes at him.

“I’m actually lazy to get up…that’s why…and babe…I just want to enjoy this morning with you in bed” I told him and I guess he misunderstood what I really mean.

“I can sense a hot morning coming up” he said with his left eyebrow going up and down playfully.

“Kwon Jiyong…I don’t mean …I just want to talk to you and cuddle…that’s it” I told him and he smirked.

“That will also end there” he said and I stuck my tongue out at him.

Last night’s session is actually up the bar and I’m telling you, my body hasn’t recovered from it yet. Yes, I was showered with love and romance, but when you’re totally