“Jiyong-ah...your wife is at their old apartment” TOP hyung told me after waiting for hours.

“Thank you so much hyung…please thank Railey for me as well” I told him and he gave out a deep chuckle.

I can sense that TOP hyung is in a good mood for the way he’s talking to me is really lively. It’s a bit weird coz it’s already pass midnight and it seems like he’s still energized.

“I am the one who is supposed to be thanking you Jiyong-ah!” he told me and curiosity started building up.

“Why is that?” I asked and he cleared his throat.

“Railey and I had a very intimate moment awhile ago…I did that to make her spit out what she knows…and I’ve succeeded” he answered and it made me smile.

“Aigoo hyung” I said and he laughed so hard.

“If I were you….go to your wife now and give her some love…make her feel that she’s the only one….and remember the things that I told you….are we clear?” he asked and I sighed.

Truth is, I don’t even know if _________ will face me. I fear that she’ll push me away and it’s really going to hurt me a lot. In terms of telling her the truth, I don’t have any problems with that for I’m so willing to tell her everything if it’s the only way to clear things out.

After talking with TOP hyung, I immediately head to the girls’ old apartment. I know that she chose to go there to breathe some air and to calm herself down. What I’m praying now is for her to understand me, which is I know she will.

Walking down the hallway really brings a lot of memories. ________ and the girls lived here before and this is really their haven. I didn’t know that my wife is the one keeping the key of their apartment.

My hands are shaking the moment I reached their unit. All my mind can think of is how to convince my wife to talk to me. _______ has this thing called “silent treatment” and I’m telling you, it will crack your head up coz her silence is really deafening and it’ll make you guilty.

“Ottoke?” I asked myself.

“AISH!” I said and hit the doorbell.

She’s not opening the door and from there, I started worrying again. What if she’s not really here? What if she just told the girls that she’s going to stay here, but the truth is she went somewhere far? Aigoo.

 “________! BABE! OPEN UP! PLEASE! OPEN UP!” I shouted while literally banging the door.

“OMO! It’s G-dragon!” a woman who went out of her unit said upon seeing me.

“________! BABE! OPEN UP! PLEASE! OPEN UP!” I shouted again, ignoring her.

I know that I’m making a scene already and this might go out in newspapers and forum sites in no time. I don’t care about scandals anymore, all I want is to speak to my wife and patch things up with her.

“________! BABE! OPEN UP! PLEASE! OPEN UP!” I continued and when I heard the door clicked open, my heart stopped for a moment.

“What are you doing here?” ______ asked upon seeing me.

Her bloodshot eyes are enough to tell me that she’s hurting and is totally in pain. I don’t know if she knows about the truth already, but from the way she looks, I know that this night will be a long one.

“Get the out of my sight!” my wife shouted and it really shocked me.

I begged her to talk to me and in one way or another, I’m thankful that she agreed. The tension inside the room is overwhelming and it is scaring the hell out of me. I know that my wife is not that good in being mad, for she doesn’t even know how to be mad. Thing is, even though she’s so soft, she can still be scary sometimes and her eyes can kill you most especially when she knows that you did something bad.

 “Jiyong…I always listen to you…but I have reached my hit mark already…I’m tired of your reasons…I’m tired of your cover ups…I’m tired of every lie that comes out from that mouth of yours…I don’t even know if I can still believe you” ______ told me  and my world nearly crush.

Her words are like daggers being stabbed deep in my heart and its pain is just too strong. Hearing my wife say that she can’t believe me anymore is really painful, for that’s her way of telling me that she can’t and doesn’t trust me anymore.

“What if the greatest love of all is the wrong one?” she asked.

I don’t even know how the hell this question entered her mind, but I can feel that she’s questioning our relationship once again. For me, she already doubts what we have and it seems that for her, this whole thing is wrong and we are not really meant for each other.

“…I am the one for you? I think Jiyong you have to really think again….am I really the one for you? Or you just happened to tripped on me but truth is…I’m not the girl that you really pictured in your mind….rather…it’s that sushi girl that you really want”

This is like slap to my whole being. My own wife thinks that after thirteen years of being together, she’s not the right girl for me and that I want another woman. Well, yes, she’s not the woman that I pictured to be with before, but when she came into my life, she’s the only woman that I want. I will not even marry her if I’m not sure of her. Most especially, I will not even waste my precious time loving and understanding her if I don’t want her. She’s thinking way too much once again and it’s really getting all of her sanity away.

The time has come. I confessed everything to her already and I know that she’s raging in anger for she’s shaking and all I can see in her eyes is pain. 

“YOU ! HOW CAN YOU DO THAT TO ME! HOW CAN YOU TAKE A GIRL HOME AND KISS HER WHEN YOU KNOW SO WELL THAT I’M LEFT HERE…MISSING YOU BADLY! HOW DARE YOU! YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU DID SOMETHING IMPORTANT THAT’S WHY YOU WEREN’T ABLE TO MAKE IT TO THE TWINS’ PARTY! THEN HERE YOU ARE! TELLING ME THAT YOU SPEND A NIGHT WITH A GIRL! THIS JUST SHOWS HOW WEAK YOU REALLY ARE!”

I let her hurt me. I’ve received a lot of punches and slaps from her, and it’s the first time that she ever hurt me like that. I took it all and endured the pain, for I know that she’s in more pain than me. My wife is already making me feel all the things that she hasn’t shown or cannot say to me.

Sorry is not enough and I know that it will not even make her feel better. My wife has exploded and the things that her heart has been keeping all these time is now out in the open. She has totally misunderstood everything and as excepted, her issues with Anne is not over yet.

What she has in mind is totally exaggerated but I can’t blame her, the only thing that I’m annoyed about is when she accused me of having a son to another girl. I may be weak when it comes to temptations but I’m not that stupid to get a girl pregnant when I swore to myself that she’ll be the only woman that can carry my babies and that she’ll be the only mother of my children.

An hour passed by and we’re still in a middle of a fight. My wife has not yet calmed down and her anger is really at the top already. When I told her the reason why I wasn’t able to go home last night, that’s when all the action starts.

_______ excused herself to get some water and after a few minutes, I heard plates breaking. At first I thought she just accidentally knocked down a plate but it went on and on and on. That’s the time when I got alarmed and next thing I know it, I’m watching my wife breaking plates and glasses with her legs bleeding for some of the plates’ pieces are hitting her.

“THIS IS FOR MY CHEATING HUSBAND! I LOVE HIM BUT HE STILL CHEATED ON ME! HE’S A FREAKIN LIAR! I HATE HIM! I HATE HIM! I HATE HIM!”

“THIS IS FOR OUR RELATIONSHIP NOW RUINED!”

At that point, I know that my wife has already had enough. This is really not her, for the ________ that I know will not even think of breaking plates just to release anger. The sight of her kills me and when she looked into my eyes, I saw intense pain and hate. Honestly, the moment I saw that, all I want to do is kill myself so that my wife will not have problems anymore.

“You are really an Jiyong…I hate you so much!” she said while I carry her inside the room.

“I hate you! I hate you!” she said while slapping me weakly.

Her words feel true but I know that she doesn’t mean it. I know that she hates me now, and I’m wishing for it not to last long coz if that happens, I will not even want to live anymore.

“Don’t waste your precious time cleaning my wounds…I’m fine….go to your other woman instead” she said and moved her leg away.

“Babe…just hold still” I said and tighten my grip.

“You don’t have to do this coz I know that you don’t want to do this” she said and I’m about to explode as well but I keep on controlling myself for I know that I’m the one at fault here and my wife is just filled with anger as of the moment.

She stopped from talking after a while and that made my mind clear up for a bit. I’m filled with a lot of things already and I don’t even know what to think anymore. I want her to understand me fully but I know that no matter how long I explain, she will not even listen, for her mind is closed as of the moment.

“I’m not upset that you lied to me”

“I’m upset that from now on…I cannot believe you anymore”

Once again, her words killed me. I feel like my heart is being stabbed to death and I’d rather choose not to save it and just wait for it to die. But then again, I deserve this. She gave me all her trust and she keeps on giving it even if there are times that I played ar