*wrote this in the middle of my bio class with my  professor talking about cells..haha! And now, I'm updating in the middle of  my Algebra class. Yeah! Talk about a good student :) Enjoy!*

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July 25

Remember when you were a kid and your biggest worry was like, if you’d get a bike for your birthday or if you’d get to eat cookies for breakfast. Being an adult? TOTALLY OVERRATED. I mean seriously, don’t be fooled by all the hot shoes and the great and the “no parents anywhere” telling you what to do. Adulthood is responsibility. RESPONSIBILITY. It really does . Unfortunately, once you get past the age of braces and training bras, responsibility doesn’t go away. It can’t be avoided. Either someone makes us face it or we suffer the consequences, and still adulthood has its perks. The scariest part about responsibility is when you screw up and let it slip right through your fingers.

Should I say it or should I not? Gosh! I’m being bugged by my conscience every single day since my kissing incident with Brady. Well, I consider it as an accident for I didn’t really see it coming and my emotions are really playing me that time. I know that what I did is really unforgivable and my husband has all the right to get mad at me. I feel so stupid because all this time, I’m going ballistic and crazy with him cheating on me and here I am, doing the same thing.

Actually, I keep on asking myself if responding to Brady’s kiss can be considered as cheating already. I feel like I’ve done a heavy crime and my punishment will really get the hell out of me. I don’t even know how Jiyong will see me after I tell him the truth. Honestly, I’m planning to just keep it in me and never say it even to Railey or Daryl. This is really the most stupid thing that I did in my entire existence and if only I can bring back time, I will definitely beat Brady because of his aggressiveness.

Honestly, sleeping and waking up beside my husband has been a burden to me these past few days for every time I look at him, I feel so guilty. I can’t even look at him straight in the eyes and even though I try to act normal, I know that he can feel that I’m carrying a heavy load inside my heart coz he knows me more than I know myself and he can read me and even my emotions just by looking at me. So basically, he can feel that I’m a bit awkward and somewhat distant these past few days.

I woke up just to find out that I’m left alone in bed and my husband is once again nowhere in sight. For these past few days, Jiyong always wakes up early to write and finish the song that he’s working on for weeks now. I’ve heard from his manager that he’s cooking up another solo album and that only means, he will be damn busy again, and my inner fan girl is gonna kick in for I’m going to cheer for him non-stop.

“Oh! You’re already awake” Jiyong said upon seeing me walk in the living room.

“MUM!” the kids shouted in glee and came running towards me.

Our kids are also making me feel so guilty. They are the ones who are going to be really affected the moment this secret of mine goes out in the open.

“Hey babies! Good Morning!” I greeted cheerfully and hugged each one of them.

“Mum…dad told us that we will exercise this morning” Danny said and I looked at Jiyong for confirmation.

“I feel like jogging babe….wanna come?” he asked with a hopeful smile on his face.

Jiyong and I use to jog around the neighborhood every morning before Danny and the rest of the kids were born (it’s not really my thing, but he always get to talk me out), we usually bring Gabby and DK with us while they’re riding their strollers and with Isabella riding her bicycle (gosh! Sweet memories).

“Alright….I’ll go with you guys” I said and the kids rejoiced except for our daughters.

“Aigoo…as if they’re all going to run” Jiyong said and I chuckled.

“Wanna bet babe?” I asked and he looked at me suspiciously.

“Sure” he said and I sit beside him on the couch.

“What’s it about?” he asked and wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me closer to him.

“The girls will not join us….we both know that exercising and sweat is not their favorite thing” I answered and he laughed.

“I can sense that they will go” he said and I nod.

“If you lose….you have to do all the chores this morning….and that includes bathing all the kids plus the dogs” I said and he looked at me in disbelief.

“That’s a lot babe” he said and I just gave him my You-just-have-to-deal-with-it look.

“Arasso…I’ll take that…but ________...if I win….you have to give me a big surprise later and I know that you know very well what I’m talking about” he said while looking really cheesy at me.

“Gosh Jiyong! That’s a lot!” I said sarcastically, making him laugh so hard.

“Better get that body ready babe” he said and got up.

I swear! I don’t even know if I can give him what he wants for I’m still in the middle of wracking my brain if I’m going to tell him about that Brady incident or not. I don’t even know if I can do a good performance later coz my mind is just too occupied and bothered.

After a few minutes of conditioning ourselves for our morning family jog, we started preparing for this rare bonding moment (we are not a sporty family, especially me and my girls).

“Wait…is the YG TV crew coming today?” I asked my husband while dressing up.

“They won’t coz they are scheduled to film Daryl and Youngbae’s household today” he answered and I sighed in relief.

Well, YG TV filming is still on and as time passes by, I’m slowly getting used to the cameras already. I can move freely and the awkwardness was lessen as well (I know that I’ll still look odd and awkward once it airs, but I’m trying so hard to act normal as possible).

“Girls? Are you serious about this?” I asked upon seeing them all dressed up for our jog.

“Yes mum…Isabella unnie and I are going to ride our bicycles so that we won’t get super tired” DK answered and my heart started racing so fast because I can already sense that I’m going to lose our bet.

“How about you Gabby?” I asked and she looked at me and sighed.

“As much as I don’t want to go mum…all of you are going and I don’t want to be left here alone…so…I will just go” she answered and I pulled her for a hug.

Out of all my kids, Gabby is the one who is not sporty at all. You can make her dance for hours but you can never convince nor force her to do strenuous activities (but she enjoys Yoga). Jogging, running and exercising is really not her thing, and that also applies with the two girls.

“Babe” Jiyong wrapped his arms around my waist from the back and rest his chin on my shoulder.

“What did I tell you awhile ago?” he asked in a teasing way, making me sigh.

“Yeah…I know…you win” I said and he bit my shoulder.

“JIYONG!” I shrieked, making him laugh so hard.

“What is wrong with you?” I asked a little bit pissed.

“Aigoo…I’m just playing with you….I’m sorry” he said and reached for my hand and kissed it.

“Mum…dad…you are already grown-ups…why are you not acting like one?” DK asked like a mother who is starting to make her kid feel that he/she is up for some scolding.

“Sorry mum” I said, earning a chuckle from her.

“DK can really be scary at times” Jiyong said while wearing his rubber shoes.

“Her future husband and kids are really going through a tough time with her” I said and my husband looked at me as if I’m telling a not-so-funny joke.

“Yah! She’s still a kid…don’t open up marriage yet…she’s still a baby” he said and I rolled my eyes at him.

“Seriously babe…I meant that as a joke and I cannot believe that you took it seriously” I told him and he hissed.

“You know so well that I’m really sensitive when it comes to our daughters” he said and I just smirked.

This protective side of my husband is really attractive and y for me and I cannot stop to think about how lucky my daughters are for having a dad like him.

“Ready?” I asked while holding Karielle.

“YES!” the boys answered excitedly while the girls just gave out a nod.

“Are the big muscled guys going with us dad?” Gabby asked her father while we’re preparing to go out.

“They won’t” he answered, making our daughter smile.

Up until now, we still have bodyguards for protection and we are going to have them till we are sure that we are out of danger already. Speaking of Lauren, she’s being so quiet nowadays and none of us have seen her after my encounter with her at YG’s parking lot. Actually, I’m wishing for her not to show up anymore coz from the way Brady sounds when we talked, I can feel that his sister is really up for something big and totally damaging.

And with that, our family started jogging already. Isabella, DK, Russelle and Karielle are riding their bicycles and small cars while the rest are jogging with us. Danny and Jiyong are having a race and I swear! It really worries me for I have a feeling that my son will break his ankle any moment coz he’s running like there’s no tomorrow.

“Babe! Slow down!” I shouted when our gap got bigger.

Gosh! Jiyong is like a child on a loose for the very first time. In all fairness to my husband, he’s getting buffier and buffier as days go by (I don’t even have a clue if he’s working out or what, but he’s really fit nowadays).

“Mum…let’s just walk…I don’t want to follow dad and the boys’ pace anymore” Gabby told me and I stopped from jogging.

“Where are your sisters?” I asked and looked around just to find out that they are sitting on the curb with their bicycles on the ground.

As expected, my girls are going to feel tired right away and we just started. This just shows that my blood is really running through their veins for I’m not a jog or running fan as well (I’d rather do Yoga or Pilates).

“Aigoo…unnie…DK…why did you stop?” Gabby asked when we reached the two girls.

“We don’t want to ride our bicycles anymore” Isabella answered and I chuckled.

“But we have to catch up with dad and the boys” I told them and they hissed.

“Mum…let’s just go home and prepare breakfast for them…after all…we cannot catch up already for they are so far now” DK said while trying to look for their dad and brothers.

“And mum…look at Karielle…she’s also tired now” Gabby said while looking at her sister who is still riding her small car and enjoying it to the max.

And with that, the girls and I just chose to go back to our house and chill there. Of course, we are going to prepare breakfast for we know so well that the boys are starving once they get back.

“Mum…there is a letter for you” Isabella said when she saw an envelope in our mail box.

“Letter for me?” I asked curiously and she handed me a red envelope.

“Be ready for some action Mrs. Kwon coz I’m going to bring back the fear and problems in your life” the letter said and