January 3

Of course, you’re going to get your heart broken. And it isn’t just going to happen once, but a lot. That’s just part of growing up, and it makes you stronger. Then you can handle it better next time. You may not get through it yourself, but your friends will help you through it. And you’ll be a stronger person because of it. Then one day someone will come along, and it’ll pay off and no one will ever break your heart again.

It’s good to be back but at the same time, it’s so scary to be back. I know that I’m being hated by so many people as of the moment and although I’m innocent, I can’t do anything about it even if I try my hardest to explain. It’s not easy to be in this position for you just don’t know what’s going on. Yes, I know who my enemy is, but I’m so sure that she’s not alone in this. I know that Anne cannot do this to me and even though it’s a total bull to say this, Anne is not that evil, she can be bad but she’s not as evil as Lauren. She still has a heart, thing is, her mind is off somewhere.

“At last!” Railey said the moment we got off the plane.

She can never be much happier. Well, this trip is not actually planned and it’s Railey who convinced me to go back. According to her, I am the only one who can clear my name and if I’m going to hide in America, things will just get dirtier and next thing we know it, the reputation that I’ve built will no longer be the same and I don’t want that to happen.

“Welcome home to us” I said sarcastically and she chuckled.

“Sweet …everything is gonna be alright…don’t worry about it too much…trust me….now that you’re already here…things will go back to their original places and that girl will eat dust” she said as I led the kids out.

Gosh! I cannot even believe that we’re really home. I mean, days ago, Jiyong and I are just talking about going home after I  give birth and now, it seems like I’ll be giving birth here and it’s just so sweet for I really want the twins to be born here in Korea. I’m also thankful that Doctor Banks have permitted me to travel (Yes, I’m one heck of a patient and he’s really stressed out because of me but it’s all good for I’m stable and can travel without any problems). As for Railey, her radiation therapy ended yesterday and her doctors also permitted her to go home but she has to have a nurse with her. Actually, I’m not expecting her doctors to say yes to travelling for she’s not that strong yet (or it’s just me who is thinking that she’s not). Nevertheless, they said that she’s near to that target point which is full recuperation and we’re so happy about that. At least now, she’s going to be reunited with TOP and the kids.

“I’m so happy to be back!” Isabella said while carrying a big teddy bear.

“I know you are baby girl” I told her and she hugged me by the waist.

OK. So nobody knows that we’re already home for we want to give everybody a big surprise. Thing is, we have forgotten that today is the boys’ concert and we’re just so lucky that we were able to get an early flight and we can still make it there later. For now, Railey and I are planning to visit Daryl and maybe go to the YG building (we know that the boys are not there for they are so busy with the concert preparations). We are going to surprise our husbands at the concert itself and I’m praying that we won’t get busted.

“I called Chin ho to pick us up...he’s here somewhere” Railey said with her head going round and round and round, looking for Chin ho.

“Aren’t you supposed to be on a wheelchair?” I asked and she looked at me with a raised eyebrow.

“Excuse me sis…I won’t even dare to ride on one….c’mon! I’m not as weak as you think …I can walk and even bring your luggage all at the same time…believe me…I’m fine and there’s no need to treat me like a total weakling” she said and I sighed.

“Whatever you say” I said and the kids shrieked upon seeing Chin ho.

It seems like we really have wild and happy bunnies with us for the moment the kids got inside the car, all they can say is “This feels so good” “I’m already home” “I want to eat patbingsu” (well the boys are really craving for it).

“Gosh! Calm down you guys!” Railey said and the kids giggled.

“Aunt Railey? Are we going to see dad already?” DK asked.

“Not yet…your mum and I have decided to surprise your dad and uncles…we are going to their concert later so for now….you have to stick with me and your mum…we’re going to visit Aunt Daryl in the hospital as well” Railey answered and the kids clapped their hands.

I really think that I’m still lucky coz even if a lot of people have seen me already they aren’t cursing or shouting at me. Oh well, maybe I’m just thinking too much. Maybe they don’t hate me that much or they just don’t care about my issues at all.

“OK…we’ll go home first…drop our things….rest for a while…change…then go to the hospital to see fat ” Railey told me while looking at her phone.

“You really planned this so well” I told her and she giggled.

“I’ve got everything scheduled….I’m such a genius!” she said and all I can do is nod.

Well, I am excited as well but my mind is just so off right now coz a lot of things are clouding it. I told myself that I will not show any signs of depression or disappointment in front of the whole gang and especially to my husband but I don’t think that I’ll succeed for the mere fact that I am being bashed and judged by people is already enough to bring me all the way down to hell.

The moment we arrived home (in our original house), the kids’ shrieks of excitement is all you can hear and their hyped buttons are totally on. The girls went to their room right away while the boys went out to the pool area. All I can say is, Dami-unnie really did a good job in maintaining our house coz everything is clean and in place. This house is really better than the second one and I’ve sworn to myself that I won’t go back to that house again (that’s where Anne and her son lived).

“I miss Bentley and Bunny” Danny said and rested his head on my lap.

“aww baby boy…don’t worry….we’ll get them soon….I’m so sure that Grandpa and Grandma will take care of them really well” I told him and he sighed.

Speaking of mum and dad. Well, they are against this trip and up to the last minute, they are persuading me. I can see their point and I totally know where they’re coming from but this is really something big and my name is already at stake here. If I’m just gonna let things be, Anne or whoever is behind her will just step on me and taint my name without me firing back. I have the right to fight back and defend myself and it’s much better to face the people than hide and let my husband shoulder everything.

“AUNT ________!” Railey’s kids ran towards me and gave me tight hugs.

“Hey guys! I missed you so much” I said while hugging the three of them.

“They are so excited to come here” Railey said and I can see a different glow in her.

“Is your mother in-law there?” I asked and she shook her head.

“According to our maid…she and Hye yoon went somewhere for a while” she answered and I gave her a nod.

“So…are you guys ready to see Aunt Daryl and your new cousin?” I asked the kids who are so busy with hugging each other.

“YES!” they answered in unison, making Railey and I giggle.

After resting for a bit, we went to prepare for the day already even with our heads spinning (jetlag is really killing the best of us), this is one hectic day and there’s no room for sleeping yet. Since I don’t have a nanny with me and Omma doesn’t know that we’re here already, I’m the one who prepared the kids and I’m telling you, it’s not much work than before. The girls are the ones who choose their outfits already and they are so independent now, while the boys can change their clothes without any help. Of course, Karielle still needs a hand but she’s so easy to dress up.

“All set?” I asked as they go down the stairs.

I have noticed that my kids have the same styles today. I don’t know, but they are sporting pants and sneakers (DK is an exception but she’s wearing pants instead of skirt).  They all look cute and vibrant. My little Karielle is also one with her unnies and hyungs for she’s wearing the same style as well.

“DK…why are you wearing flats? We told you to wear sneakers right?” Gabby asked while looking at her sister from head to foot.

“Unnie…I don’t want to wear sneakers and I don’t have a good pair at all” DK answered.

“Mum…we have planned to wear the same outfit and even agreed to dress non girly today but DK is really ruining it for she’s wearing a ribbon on her hair and some flats” Gabby said and I giggled.

“Baby girl…we all know that your sister is really a girly dresser…she’s not into boyish looks at all…you and your Isabella unnie can take it all in while she cannot….just let her be” I told her and she sighed.

“Thanks for saving me mum” DK said and I hugged her.

Welcome to the world of girls. Well, even though they think the same and talk the same, my daughters still have their own characters and DK is a bit far from the other two. Isabella and Gabby have a lot in common and even share the same interests while DK is a bit weird when it comes to certain things and being girly is really her biggest life rule. Pants and sneakers are not that in for her but if you’re going to give her a ribbon, she’ll wear it proudly no matter how big it is.

And we’re all set and good to go!