Hey guys! I'm back! Finally! I know that I owe you chaps and I'm really sorry for not being able to update, but I'll try to update thrice today just to make up. Enjoy! :D

November 28

Life is made of fear. Some people eat fear soup three times a day. Some people eat fear soup all the meals there are. I eat it sometimes. When they bring me fear soup to eat. I try not to eat it, I try to send it back. But sometimes, I’m too afraid to and have to eat it anyway.

Today, I’ve realized that my kids are really growing up. Their emotions are more intense, their thinking is way mature than before and they are physically maturing as well. This just made me think that sooner or later, my kids will have their own lives already and next thing we know it, we’ll be walking them down the aisle as well (OK. This is me exaggerating and being really sentimental).

Jiyong and I woke up with a lot of noise in the background. My husband hasn’t slept at all yet for he’s been in the studio since yesterday afternoon and just got home two hours ago (they’re comeback will be a week from now that’s why they’re rushing things and polishing it as well).

“Mum! Mum! Dad! Dad!”

“MUM! DAD! MUM! DAD!”

“Babe…the girls are calling us” I shook Jiyong by the shoulders but he didn’t even budge.

And with my husband totally ignoring me, I dragged my heavy out of bed to check on the girls (my baby bump is getting bigger everyday and it’s also heavier now).

“What is going on here?” I asked the moment I opened the door to the girls’ room.

“MUM!” Gabby shouted and ran towards me.

“What’s happening?” I asked worriedly.

These are the times that I tend to panic more than my kids. Well, the girls have the tendency to make you all frantic with just the way they move (with Gabby’s exaggeration skills, you will truly go nuts).

“Unnie….Isabella unnie” Gabby said while catching her breath.

“What’s with your sister? Where is she?” I asked frantically.

“She’s in the bathroom” she ran to the bathroom and I rushed as well.

“MUM!” DK shouted upon seeing me, she’s the one accompanying Isabella inside the bathroom.

“What’s going on here?” I asked.

I saw my eldest daughter in the tub, still wearing her pajamas while crying her eyes out. At this point, my whole being is already being shaken for I don’t have a bit of a clue on what is happening. I have a feeling that she peed on her bed or had a tummy ache, but it’s not normal of Isabella to pee on her bed (she never did that) and when she’s having a tummy ache, she’ll always run to us and ask for a medicine.

“Baby girl…what’s the matter?” I bent down and rubbed her back gently.

“Blood” she looked down and I saw her pajama and it has blood stain in one spot.

OK. Don’t panic. Breathe. You’ve been here before. Gosh! Why is this happening today? I mean, c’mon! We’ll be leaving for America later this evening and it’ll be really uncomfortable for my daughter to travel.

“Baby girl….don’t cry…OK? Calm down” I told her and she looked at me with fear in her eyes.

Why haven’t I oriented my girls about menstrual periods and the physical changes that a woman will undergo as time pass by.

“What is happening to unnie mum?” DK asked with watery eyes.

“It’s nothing serious babies…this is all normal” I answered and smiled at them.

“Normal? But mum…unnie is bleeding…that’s not normal” Gabby said, making me chuckle.

“I’ll explain everything to the three of you later….for now…we have to get your sister out of this tub and make her sit on the toilet bowl” I instructed and they helped me lift their sister up.

“I don’t want to walk…I can feel it trickling down” Isabella said and I looked at her and shook my head.

My head is really blank and I don’t even know how and where to begin my sudden “woman orientation”. As far as I can remember, my mum had oriented me about the many changes a woman will experience and undergo. That’s why when the time came for me to have my first period, I already know what’s going on and in one way or another, I know how to deal with it already (I went frantic for a minute or two, cried buckets of tears while putting a sanitary napkin on my underwear and after that, I went back to bed and curl into ball all day). But of course, I’m different from my mum coz I’ve totally forgotten about this kind of orientation and this serves as a lesson for me.

“Am I going to die mum?” Isabella asked with tears falling down her cheeks.

“Huh? NO!” I answered in surprise “You are fine baby girl…this really happens to girls” I told her and she looked at me, clueless.

“mmm….just sit there and I’ll get something downstairs” I said “Girls…don’t leave your sister…alright?” I asked the two younger girls and they gave me a nod.

Of course, I need to get sanitary napkins and introduce it to my girls. It’s a good thing that I store napkins in the house even if I don’t need it for the time being. I rushed down to the store room where all our basic necessities are, and grabbed a whole pack of sanitary napkins.

“Babe?” Jiyong called all of a sudden when I was about to go upstairs already.

“Babe!” I said in shock.

“Why are you up so early and where are you going?” he looked at what I’m holding and I can feel his curiosity building up.

“mmm….I have an emergency upstairs” I answered and continued going up the stairs when he grabbed me by the arm, making me stop.

“What is that emergency?” he asked and I can see worry in his eyes.

“Babe….there’s no need to worry about anything…I’ve got it under control and it’s nothing serious” I answered and he sighed.

“If it’s nothing serious and it’s all under control…why aren’t you telling it to me? One more thing….what are you going to do with that?” he pointed at the sanitary napkin in my hand which I immediately hid behind me.

I don’t even know why I don’t wanna break the news to Jiyong when I know so well that he will know about it later as well. Maybe it’s a girl thing because when I was young, my dad doesn’t even have a clue that I’m already a lady, he just discovered it when he saw a pack of napkins in my bag (he even pretended that he doesn’t know anything).

“It’s for Isabella babe” I told him honestly and my lovely husband’s eyes got big in shock.

“Jiyong” I called for he’s not even moving an inch.

“That only means….Isabella…is…already….a….” he looks like his soul has flown somewhere far.

“Our daughter is already a certified young lady” I told him and smiled.

I kinda expected Jiyong to react like this, but it still amazes me. My husband looks like he’s about to give up our daughter for marriage already. Yes, I know that this is really shocking for we haven’t prepared ourselves for these changes yet coz in our minds, our children are still small kids neither than we know, they are about to face adulthood soon.

“Yes babe…she is” I said just to snap him out of his senses.

After surprising Jiyong with my oh-so-good-and-bloody news, we rushed to see the girls who are still in the bathroom waiting patiently for me.

“Dad!” they shouted all at the same time upon seeing their father.

“I’ll just stay here….DK…Gabby…come here” Jiyong called the two girls and they went to him right away.

And now the time has come for me to explain things to Isabella point by point. I don’t have a ready speech yet. Anyway, I’ll just say whatever my mind tells me. I just hope that she’ll understand.

“OK…you have to wash first baby girl” I said with a smile on my face “Use this” I gave her a bottle of feminine wash.

“And then” I pulled out the napkin in its wrapper and showed it to her.

“This is a sanitary napkin….this will be your bestfriend for a few days” I told her and she looked at me weirdly.

And our talk started from there. I told her everything that she has to know and as expected, she cannot grasp things that easily yet. My daughter cried when I told her that she’s already a young lady and is no longer a baby and I can say that reality hasn’t kicked in yet.

“Are you having cramps?” I asked after she changed her clothes.

“No” she answered and pouted.

“Let’s go out now” I reached for her hand and she started crying once again.

“Baby girl…this is normal….sooner or later your sisters will experience this as well” I told her and in one way or another, she calmed down.

The moment we went out of the bathroom, DK and Gabby ran towards their sister right away and asked if she was OK. Isabella gave out a nod and hugged her sisters which melted my heart. This scene just shows that my eldest daughter is finding comfort from her sisters.

“Come here girls” I sit beside Jiyong on Gabby’s bed while the girls sit on Isabella’s bed.

“DK…Gabby….I will explain something important to you girl” I looked at them and they just gave me a blank expression.

“Mum…does dad know about it already?” Isabella asked all of a sudden and looked at her father.

“Yes baby girl…I already know” Jiyong answered and I can still feel shock in him.

“Is that OK mum?” Isabella asked and I gave her a nod.

Well, I told Isabella that she shouldn’t brag about this whole thing to everyone not unless they’re close to her. I also said that she shouldn’t be too comfortable with boys now (you know what I mean with this, right?).

“It is baby girl” I answered and smiled at her.

“What is it unnie?” DK asked curiously.

“Well…your sister is already a certified young lady” I told the two girls cheerfully and they looked at Isabella in confusion “She had her first period this morning….and this period that I’m talking about is very natural and is happening to every girl when they reached a certain age” I started and the girls are now getting more curious.

I end up telling them my experience and struggle when I had my first period. I didn’t used any hard to comprehend words because I know that it’ll just confuse them more. The whole orientation went by smoothly and from the looks of it, my girls seem to understand everything point by point.

“This is how you put a napkin” I demonstrated it to them while my husband is just watching what I’m doing.

“It’s like a diaper” I told them, making them giggle.<