It had been Lay’s idea to go out all together today and to go to the pool to swim. You were excited that you were able to spend some time with these silly boys again after having to miss them for so long. You knew that their promotions were heavy and that they were busy all the time, giving concerts, interviews and doing photoshoots. It wasn’t easy for them and so you didn’t want to add more pressure on your boyfriend by asking him to make time for you as well, though you missed him a lot. But when he had called you yesterday do invite you for the swim party, you had been really happy. So now you were holding Baekhyun’s hand, his fingers laced through yours as he walked you towards the edge of the pool. It was nice to see all these guys together, all having fun and all being relaxed, not worrying about a next schedule that was coming up. They waved at you as they saw you and some of them came up to hug you. Baekyun and you had been dating for a while now and they had sort of become your family. 

You grabbed your towel and placed it down beside Kyungsoo’s and Baekhyun’s taking place in between the two guys. It was a beautiful sunny day and you wished there were no other seasons than summer, you wished the weather could always be this bright. You leaned back on your hands, shaking your hair back as you lifted your head up to the son, feeling the warmth shine down on your face. In the back you could hear a few guys diving into the pool, all laughing as Chen pushed Sehun in without mercy. It was hard to remember sometimes that they were just young boys who also wanted to be free and have fun and you could figure out that these kind of moments were very important to them. That they could just all be together without having that big responsibility to make their fans happy and to make big music. Right now they were just themselves, jumping into the water without any care of the world. 

You were smiling at them as Baekhyun suddenly leaned forward and eyed you, which made you look at him with a questioning look. “Babe, did you eat all the ice cream when I was gone?” He asked as he poked your belly softly, making it visible since you were wearing a bikini. As the other boys who were still sitting with you chuckled you felt your cheeks turning hot. “Why?” You asked as you wondered why he thought that, you hadn’t eaten the ice cream at all, you had no idea what he was talking about. “Because you gained weight. You’re getting a little bit chubby.” He said but shrugged nonchalantly, as if it didn’t mean anything. But you could still hear the other boys laugh softly beside you, making old memories flow back into your mind. You hadn’t always been looking like this. It was in your genes, being bigger than the usual girls of your age. When you had been in high school you had been a little bit fat, and for a whole time you had been bullied by your classmates and you had been laughed at. 

They had been pointing at you, saying ‘there comes the cookie monster. I’m curious to know how much cookies she devour yesterday!’ It had been horrible to hear all the other students just laugh at you instead of helping you or standing up for you. You couldn't help that you were made to be a little bit bigger than the others, it had never been what you had wanted. So then you had decided to loose the weight and you had finally felt comfortable with your form. No one had ever noticed that you had been heavier of your friends and you were proud of what you had accomplished. Still you were embarrassed of how you used to look so you told as less people as possible about your horrible past. The reason why you had never told Baekhyun was probably because you were afraid he wouldn’t love you anymore if he’d find out that you actually hadn’t always been this skinny. But now he was telling you that you had gained weight once again and that you were getting chubby, it made you feel insecure. You hadn’t noticed it yourself though, had you really been eating more when he had been away? 

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