Lie?
I'm DifferentJunhyung’s POV
I was discharged shortly after but the doctor said to take things slow. They forced me to stay indoors for two weeks before joining them for practice. But I guess it’s okay, I would just practice on my own at home when they are not around.
That Haneul girl comes every day, be it the hospital or our dorm. Doesn’t she have a life? I don’t mean it in a bad way, but why is she wasting so much time on me when I can’t even remember her? I feel bad, honestly. Seeing her busy herself around our dorm without uttering a word, but no matter how hard I try, she don’t seem to ring a bell.
Ever since that day, she has never told me again that she is my girlfriend, but the boys repeat it to me every day. They told me how I was head over heels over her, how sweet we were together, but then, really? If we were so blissful, then how can I forget her?
Each time I try to ask her about our relationship, she would either change the topic or ignore me totally. I feel like an for asking, but her actions really make me wonder, was I really her boyfriend? If yes, then does she not love me anymore? I know nothing about her, except that her name is Haneul.
“Hey, lunch’s ready.” She said tiredly.
“Thanks.” I mumbled as I settled down at the dining table.
“You know..” I started.
“What?” She asked, looking up.
“You don’t have to come daily.” I said.
She dropped her spoon and looked at me.
“Am I bothering you?” She asked.
What a straightforward question.
“No no! I mean.. I’m sure you have a life too, right? Why are you spending so much time here?” I said softly.
“Should I go?” She asked.
“No! I mean, I… I don’t know. I don’t wish to pull you down.” I said.
“Are you telling me that I should leave because you’ll most likely never remember me again? Are you telling me that I should stop wasting my time on you and just move on with my life? Are you telling me that…” She bit her lower lip.
I saw tears forming in her eyes, threatening to fall.
“Please don’t cry.” I mumbled.
I don’t know if it’s a natural reaction or is it just because it’s her, but my heart aches when I see her tears.
She in a deep breath and looked at me.
“Are you telling me that we should just pretend nothing happened between us simply because you cannot remember me anymore? Is this a break up?” She asked.
“How is it a break up when I can’t remember anything? And you’re not telling me anything, how do I know you’re not lying?” I absentmindedly blabbered out the thoughts in my head.
She looked at me with wide eyes. She laughed mockingly, but tears flowed down her cheeks.
“So you think I am lying?” She asked.
“I.. I didn’t mean..” I mumbled, but she cut me off when she took up the cup of cold water.
I froze, bracing myself for the splash on my face.
My jaws dropped when I watch her pour the water onto her own head. She dropped the cup and laughed.
“What did you think you were doing!?” I yelled.
“I was trying to wake myself up from the nightmare. But it seems like I wasn’t sleeping after all. Ha~” She smiled.
“I’ll get a towel.” I mumbled as I ran into the room.
I rushed out again when I heard the front door slam. She wasn’t there anymore.
Why do I feel so guilty? Why do I feel like an ? But why can’t I remember anything?
“YONG JUNHYUNG!!! REMEMBER SOMETHING!!!” I yelled, banging my head against the wall, but besides pain, I felt nothing at all.
Haneul’s POV
I sat by the pavement, burying my face in my palms. I cried out. I couldn’t be bothered about the weird stares people are giving me. My heart ached like crazy. How could he even say that? Even if that was what he was thinking, how could he say it straight in my face?
I am lying? If I were lying to him, would I have stayed by him dumbly? I would have made up lots of stories just to get him to believe me. How could he say I am lying? What has the coma done to him? Why has he become so rude and insensitive?
I spaced out, watching the cars zoom by as his words played in my head over and over again. Honestly, I cannot blame him for thinking that I am lying to him, can I? I have never given him a clue as to who the hell I am. I ignored his questions all the time.
Call me selfish, but I wanted him to remember me on my own. The reason why I gave him no clue whatsoever as to who I really am is because I really wanted him to remember me on his own accord, and not by the pieces I put together.
But it’s not working, isn’t it? He is awkward with me. I get fed up when he constantly ask me who I actually am? We’re both hurting each other indirectly, aren’t we? Or maybe, I am just hurting myself, I am just punishing myself.
I pulled the hood over my head. The cold wind blowing against my wet hair is starting to give me a headache. Should I end it? Should I just, like he say, move on with my life? A part of me wants him to remember, but a part of me is stopping me from it. Stupid pride, always getting in the way.
Junhyung’s POV
I found her number in my phone. I was so happy that I could finally find a way to contact her, but my happiness was short lived when I heard the phone ringing, in the house. I wanted to go out to look for her, but I was afraid that she would come back.
“What should I do? What should I do?” I mumbled, pacing in and out of the rooms.
I looked out of the balcony, trying to see if I could catch a glimpse of her, but everyone from that high level were just walking black dots. How stupid of me to actually think I could see clearly from so high.
“Where are you? Gosh~” I mumbled.
I cannot remember her, but I cannot help feeling anxious. Something inside me is yelling at me. I made her cry. I made her leave. I hurt her. I had no recollection as to who she was, but my heart ached like crazy. It hurts so bad I could literally feel my heart tighten. Am I having a heart attack?
I was trying to calm myself down when the door burst open.
“WHERE DID YOU GO!? DO YOU KNOW HOW WORRIED I WAS!?” I yelled.
She stood at the door, her eyes red and puffy, and her hair still damp from the water she poured over herself. What a crazy action.
She shut the door behind her and strolled into the house, but did not answer my question.
“You’ll fall sick if you don’t dry yourself up!” I said, grabbing the towel from the sofa.
I was about to help her dry her hair when she took the towel from me and randomly rubbed her hair with it before throwing the towel aside.
“It’s not dry.” I said.
“I have something to say.” She said emotionlessly.
“Huh?” I asked, half expecting her to yell something like ‘I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY! ARE YOU DEAF!?’.
“I have something to say.” She sighed softly.
“Al.. Alright.” I mumbled.
She looked at me in my eyes.
Her calmness is freaking me out. What did she want to tell me? Is she… Leaving?
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