Junhyung’s POV

“I’m so sorry~” Haneul cried, looking at me.

I touched her face lightly and smiled at her.

“It’s alright. It’s not your fault.” I said.

“It is! It is!! Why am I such a horrible person? Why do I keep screwing up? Why can’t I just screw up my own life? Why am I destroying yours as well? Why?” She cried.

“What do you mean by screw up your life and mine? You’re not screwed up, silly. You’re not. Please.” I said, pulling her into a tight embrace.

“I am hurting everyone!” She said in between her sobs.

“You’re not.” I caressed her back, calming her down.

After she calmed down, she looked up at me.

“Better?” I asked, wiping the tears of her cheeks.

She shook her head, pouting.

“Haneul ah, some things happen for a reason. I always believe that if I am going to die, I am going to die no matter what. But if I am not going to die, I wouldn’t die no matter what.” I said, holding her hand.

“NO YOU CANNOT DIE!!! YOU CAN’T!! WHAT AM I GOING TO DO IF YOU DIE!? HOW AM I GOING TO SURVIVE WITHOUT YOU!?” She cried again.

“Shhh shhh..” I hugged her, letting her cry.

We fell asleep in each other’s arms.

The next morning, I was awoken by a poke on my cheek. I opened my eyes slightly but closed them again when I did not see anything. I felt another poke on the other side of my cheek. This is scary.

I opened my eyes and looked around. I almost screamed when I saw four huge eyes staring at me; Ji Eun and Tae Hyun.

“Sorry. They insisted on coming.” Jace whispered.

“It’s alright. Hey~” I smiled, patting their heads.

I couldn’t move much with Haneul still asleep on my chest.

“Are you swick?” Tae Hyun pouted, slapping his small palm onto my forehead.

“Aigoo~ No, I am okay.” I smiled.

“You’re swick.” He pouted.

“Don’t pout.” I poked his lips lightly, causing him to laugh.

“Shhh~” I pointed at Haneul who was sleeping.

“Opps~” He covered his mouth, still giggling.

“Hi, Ji Eun.” I said, smiling at her.

“Hi.” She mumbled.

“Thank you for coming to visit me.” I said.

She shook her head slightly. I did not know if it meant ‘you’re welcome’ or ‘I didn’t actually want to be here’, but either way, I was happy to see her.

“For you~” She pulled out a robot soft toy from her bag.

“Me?” I asked.

“It’s mine. But, I’ll lend it to you.” She said.

“Lend it to me?” I asked.

“To accompany you here so you wouldn’t be scared.” She said.

“Can’t I have it? It’s so cute.” I .

She pouted and looked at me.

“It’s…” She cut me off before I could finish.

“Okay.” She mumbled.

“Really?” I asked.

She nodded thou she seemed slightly upset.

“Take care of it.” She said.

“I will.” I said.

Haneul shifted slightly and woke up. She looked at me, then looked around and got a shock.

“Why are you all here?” She asked, still half awake.

“They insisted on coming, so I took them here.” Jace explained.

“Oh. What’s the time now?” She asked, looking at the clock.

“10.30AM.. WAIT WHY AREN’T YOU TWO IN SCHOOL!?” She yelled.

Both Ji Eun and Tae Hyun hid under my blanket, hugging me tightly.

“Come out! Don’t you think by hiding under Junhyung’s blanket you’ll be safe. GET OUT OF THERE!” She yelled.

“Forgive them.” I pleaded.

“You’re in the hospital, Skye. Shhh~” Jace said.

“Appa help~” I heard Tae Hyun say.

“No one is going to help you now! Get out!” Haneul yelled.

I held onto the both of them and pouted at Haneul.

“If they stop coming to visit me, it’s your fault. I’m going to blame you for it.” I said.

She looked at me.

“But it’s wrong to skip school!” She yelled.

“You skipped a great deal yourself.” I mumbled.

“Junhyung’s right.” Jace mumbled.

“When did both of you become BFFs!?” She yelled.

“We’re just stating the facts.” I said.

She sighed and pulled off my blanket.

“Get off him, you’re crushing him with both your weight.” She said.

They shook their heads, burying their face into my chest.

“I’m not going to do anything alright! What can I do now? You’ve already skipped. But bear in mind, this is the only exception!” She said.

“Go give your umma a kiss and say thank you.” I whispered to them.

They jumped off my chest and ran towards Haneul, hugging her legs and showcasing all the aegyo in them.

“Ummaaaaaaaaaaa~ Sorwyyyyyy~~” They pouted.

They stayed on for a while more before leaving.

“Junhyung appa, get well soon and play with me!” Tae Hyun said, giving me a kiss on my cheek.

“I will.” I smiled, patting his head.

“Iloveyou.” Ji Eun mumbled, kissing me on my cheek before running to Jace.

Did the girl just tell me she love me?

“Snap out of it!” Haneul laughed, snapping her fingers into my face.

“Did Ji Eun tell me she love me?” I asked.

“I guess she did.” She said.

“Oh my god hahahaha!” I laughed, hugging the robot soft toy tightly. It had the baby smell Ji Eun had on her.

“Eh, she forgot to take it back.” Haneul said, looking at the robot soft toy.

“No, she gave it to me.” I said.

“Gave it to you? How could it be?” She said.

“Why not?” I asked, wiggling the toy in her face.

“But Ji Eun cannot sleep without it. She cried like crazy when Ahjumma took it to wash and it did not dry in time for her to hug it to sleep.” Haneul said.

“Are you serious?” I asked.

“Do I look like I am lying?” She asked.

I shook my head and looked at the toy.

“Congratulations, Junroro! You have officially won over the heart, mind and soul of our ice princess.” Haneul smiled.

“But I don’t even know if I can be with her for long.” I mumbled, squishing the toy.

“Please don’t say something like that.” She sat down beside me, intertwining her fingers with mine.

“You’ll be okay. You survive the past two tests, you’ll survive this too.” She said.

“There aren’t that many miracles in life.” I mumbled, looking away.

Not that I did not want to be hopeful, I just can’t. I did not want to give her hope and then watch her crumble in disappointment when the results tell otherwise.

Haneul’s POV

Junhyung’s fever came and went. He was okay for a while, and then the next moment he would be vomiting and pale. The doctors were worried as well. They couldn’t take his blood for testing until days later when he was finally a little more stable.

“How long would it take?” I asked the doctor.

“About three weeks. We’ll need to run a few more tests that’s why the long period.” He explained.

“What are the… odds?” I asked.

“Honestly, seeing his current condition, it’s pretty high.” He said.

“Thanks.” I mumbled, walking back to Junhyung’s room.

Despite being in pain, he smiled and acted like normal in front of others. If he is still smiling, I cannot be sulking, can I? I got to be strong for him. But the fact he is smiling so much, I am even more worried.

“Feeling better? Want to eat something?” I asked, sitting beside him.

He shook his head.

“But Junroro hasn’t eaten in a few days.” I pouted.

“Junroro doesn’t need to eat.” He smiled.

“Maybe Junroro doesn’t need to eat, but Junroro cannot bottle up his feelings.” I said, holding his hand.

“What feelings?” He asked.

“You know what I am referring to. Junroro doesn’t need to be smiling all day long. He can cry and throw a tantrum too. Lionny’s only request is that Junroro do it when she is around, so she can hug him, like this.” I said, hugging him tight.

“Why the sudden baby talk?” He laughed.

“Because I am thwee!” I yelled, showing him three fingers.

“No! You’re four. I am thwee!” He said, raising one more of my finger to show a four.

“Junroro, whatever happens, I’ll be with you, you know it, right?” I asked.

He looked down.

“Look at me.” I said, pushing his chin up.

“I’m here for you. You’re not alone.” I said.

“Yea, yea.” He smiled, it wasn’t genuine, but I did not press on.

“Oh! See what I got you!” I said, putting a bouquet of sunflowers on his lap.

“Sunflowers?” He asked.

“Yeap!” I smiled.

“Why?” He asked, looking at the flowers.

“Because sunflowers are the happiest of flowers. Sunflowers are a symbol of happiness, warmth, loyalty, longevity and strength. They provide energy in the form of nourishment and vibrance and they also give people a sense of optimistic!” I smiled.

“Where did you copy that from?” He laughed.

“I SUMMARIZED WHATEVER I READ!” I yelled.

“Alright, alright. I was just kidding. Thank you.” He said.

“I don’t know what I can do for you except by being here and annoying you.” I said.

“Your presence is more than enough.” He said.

“And besides, why buy sunflowers when you’re already a walking one?” He said.

“I’m not sunny enough.” I laughed.

“True. You’re too fierce to be a sunflower.” He said.

“Yah!” I whacked him with the pillow.

I guess at times like these we could only act like that to keep each other going. I lean in to kiss him but he turned away, not allowing me to. He has been behaving like this ever since hearing what the doctor said. I don’t blame him, but I cannot help but feel hurt by his actions. I could only give him pecks on his cheek when he is asleep.

***

“Have you eaten?” Ahjumma asked.

“It’s fine. I’m not hungry.” I said, sitting down at the dining table.

“You can’t keep skipping dinner. You need the energy to keep Junhyung going.” She said.

“I know but I just don’t have the appetite.” I said.

“How is he?” She asked.

“Better I guess.” I said.

“Then how about the.. results?” She asked.

“It’ll take three weeks.” I said.

“Come here.” She said, pulling me into her arms.

“It’ll pass, and you two will pull through.” She said, my hair.

Her actions made me burst into tears. I have been trying to hold it in since forever, but I guess her actions were my breaking point.

“I am scared! What if he really gets infected? What if he dies? I can’t live without him! I am really scared!” I cried.

“You remember what I told you about the marriage vow?” She asked.

I nodded.

“Have you figured it out?” She asked.

I shook my head.

“Then go figure it out. When you do, you’ll see things differently.” She said.

“Just tell me!” I pleaded.

She shook her head and smiled.

“You got to figure it out for yourself to make it worthwhile, my dear girl.” She said.

I lied in bed that night, unable to fall asleep. The words of the marriage vows kept replaying in my head. I thought hard, but I still couldn’t figure out what she actually meant. Why did her boyfriend ask her such a question? And why is Ahjumma asking me the same thing now?

I fell asleep unconsciously and was woken up by the ringing of my phone. I thought it was my alarm, but then it wasn’t. It was a call from an unknown number. I usually do not answer such calls but my gut feeling told me to answer it, so I did.

“Hello?” I answered.

“This is Seoul General Hospital.” The voice said.

I sat up instantly.

“Yea?” I answered. I could feel my heart race and my palms sweat even before I was told what happened.

“Could you please come down to the hospital as soon as possible? Yong Junhyung sshi is missing.” The voice said.

I threw my phone aside and dashed out of the room. Never in my life did I know I could get ready so quickly. Even before I knew it, I was speeding my way to the hospital. On the way, I kept calling him on his phone but there was no one answered. I sent him countless texts as I drove, only stopping when I almost crashed into a lamppost.

“Calm down, Haneul. Calm down.” I mumbled to myself.

I used a few minutes to calm myself down before driving again.

Junroro, when I find you, you’re so dead. No, scratch that, I don’t want you dead. I just want you alive and well. As long as you’re safe, nothing else matters. Please be safe. Please, I beg you, please.

***
The toy Ji Eun gave Junroro

How Haneul is feeling with so many things going on

and Junhyung