Haneul’s POV

I sat outside the operating theater, staring into space. I cannot help but laugh remembering the silly thing I did the other time I was here. Then I start to wonder, why does Junhyung hide stuff from me? Is it because I have not proved myself to be trustworthy enough for him? Or is it how he was treated by his family in the past that made him unable to bring himself to fully trust someone?

If that is the case, then I shouldn’t even be angry with him. He is scared, I don’t blame him. Who wouldn’t be, after receiving such treatment at such a young age? Besides, he isn’t that old now. In the eyes of elders, he is still a child, yet he has to face such things alone.

“Haneul.” I heard a voice call out.

I turned to where the voice was from and saw Seungho walking towards me.

“Hi~” I waved at him.

“Are you feeling better? I heard about what happened yesterday.” He said, sitting beside me.

“I’m fine, thank you.” I said.

“Have you eaten?” He asked.

“No, but I’m not hungry. I’ll eat later.” I said.

“How long have he been inside?” He asked.

“About… One hour or so.” I said.

“So for the past hour you have just been sitting here?” He asked.

“Apparently.” I laughed.

“How patient.” I said.

“I promised him I’ll stay here to wait for him.” I said.

/FLASHBACK

“From the X-ray pictures, it seem like Junhyung sshi, you have a hairline crack on your spine. It should be the cause of the strong impact from the metal handle.” The doctor said.

“Hairline crack on the spine!?” I shouted.

Junhyung covered my mouth and apologized to the doctor on my behalf.

“Sorry. I was just shocked. Is it… serious?” I asked.

“It will heal, but not unless you allow it to.” The doctor said.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“We cannot operate on his spine, firstly because the crack is too near his major nerves and secondly, any operation on the spine is more than just a major one. It is a hairline crack that would heal, so I don’t see why we should let him take the risk.” The doctor said.

“So it’ll heal on its own?” I asked.

“Yes, but he needs ample rest. That means no strenuous movements for at least three months.” The doctor said.

“Three months!?” Junhyung looked at the doctor in shock.

“Junhyung sshi, it’s your spine that we are talking about. It’s a human’s lifeline.” He said.

Junhyung looked at me.

“I know your occupation, Junhyung sshi. Asking you to take a break for three months is as good as asking you to leave the entertainment circle. But for your own sake, you really need ample rest.” The doctor said.

“I have a world tour coming up.” Junhyung mumbled.

“Is there any way out?” I asked.

“Healing is a long and painful process. I’ll prescribe him painkillers, and he needs to come back for routine checkups. You can also wear a back brace for more support. It eases the pain. You have to dance and practice, I know. But you also need to rest your back as much as possible. You have to work that out yourself.” The doctor said.

Junhyung nodded.

“And his hand….” I said.

“He needs an operation, I told him already.” The doctor said.

“He’s doing it.” I said.

Junhyung looked at me, wide eyed.

“I…” He stuttered.

“Sorry, excuse us for a moment.” I said as I dragged Junhyung out.

“Darling, why did you agree on the operation for me?” He asked.

“You’re doing the operation. You don’t have a choice.” I said.

“But I wouldn’t heal in time for the tour!” He said.

“Yong Junhyung! What is more important? The world tour or your health?” I asked.

“But it’s my job.” He mumbled.

“Fine! Then carry on and do it! Don’t do the operation. You can lose your hand and your back for all I care! Since you decided to hide it from me in the first place, I’ll just pretend I know nothing.” I said.

“Darling, please.” He held onto my arm.

I pushed him away and we stayed silent for quite awhile.

“Okay, I’ll do it. But..” He said softly.

“But what?” I asked.

“Would you stay with me?” He asked.

“Of course! Do you even have to ask?” I said.

He smiled slightly.

“I don’t like seeing you in pain, do you understand?” I said, hugging him.

“Sorry for worrying you.” He said.

“Don’t be. Come on, let’s not keep the doctor waiting.” I said.

The doctor scheduled his operation to be later in the evening since it was pretty much an emergency.

“I’m scared.” He said, pouting.

“Hahahahaha! Awww~” I sat beside him, pushing his fringe out of his face.

“Don’t laugh!” He whined.

“Alright. It’s just that you’re cute.” I said, pinching his cheeks.

“And this gown is so uncomfortable!” He complained.

“Stop complaining! What about it!?” I asked, lifting up the blanket.

He covered his crotch area instantly. I laughed at his sudden action.

“Ahhh~ Too airy for little Junhyung? Tsk tsk~ Your rheumatism might act up.” I said.

“I DON’T HAVE RHEUMATISM!!!” He shouted in frustration.

I laughed harder at his outburst.

The nurses came shortly after for him. I held his hand all the way to the operating theater.

“You wouldn’t barge in out of a sudden, right?” He said.

“Well, maybe if I am bored, I would.” I said.

“Be sure to wake me up so I can play with you.” He said.

“I will.” I said, kissing him on his forehead.

“It’ll be over really soon, and I’ll be here waiting for you. When you wake up, you’ll see me.” I said.

“Promise?” He asked.

“Promise.” I said, hooking my pinky with his.

“Go get something to eat okay.” He said.

“I will. Be good and don’t bully the doctor.” I said.

“Don’t bully the kids if you happen to see them.” He said.

“I wouldn’t.” I smiled.

“Fighting!” I said as the doctor pushed him in.

As soon as he was out of sight, I sank into the seat and started texting the others about the operation.

/END OF FLASHBACK

Seungho and I chatted about a lot of stuff until the operating light went off. The doctor stepped out and we approached him.

“How is he?” I asked.

“The operation is a success. But just to let you know, it is normal if he feels the pain or if the wound swells for the first one, two weeks.” The doctor said.

“Alright. Thank you.” I bowed slightly together with Seungho.

“I’ll go buy you some food.” Seungho said as we walked back to Junhyung’s ward.

“It’s fine.” I said.

“You don’t have a say in this, little girl.” He said.

“I’m not a little girl.” I hissed.

“You are. You’re the youngest here. So, you are.” He said into my face.

I pushed his face away.

“Is sandwich okay?” He asked.

“Yea. Thanks.” I said.

We separated ways. When I arrived at Junhyung’s room, he was already there, asleep.

“You did well.” I whispered into his ear.

I sat down beside him, playing with his fingers while waiting for him to wake up as well as waiting for Seungho to return.  Seungho returned shortly while three bags of food. I stared at him in surprise, I thought he was only buying sandwiches.

“Don’t be so shock. I wouldn’t force you to finish everything. I am eating too, and if Junhyung wakes up, he may want to eat as well.” He said.

“But that’s a lot of food.” I said as I watched him take out the food from the bag. The bag seemed like a bottomless pit. He just kept fishing out food.

“The Beast’s boys are on their way. They are always hungry.” He said.

“Seems like you’re the one who is always hungry.” I mumbled.

“I heard that.” He said.

“Opps~” I laughed.

We ate while waiting. The other Beast’s boys came awhile later and true enough, they were hungry.

“I’ll go buy more food.” I said.

“It’s okay, I’ll go.” Yoseob said.

“Just eat.” I smiled.

“Use this.” Doojoon said, handing me a stack of cash.

“Don’t be crazy.” I pushed the money back to him and walked out.

I don’t know how much they could eat, so I just bought a bit of everything. I had five bags full of food in the end. As I was heading towards the ward, I saw all of them outside. A wave of panic struck me. Did something happen to Junhyung?

“What happened!?” I asked anxiously.

“Wow, that’s a lot of food.” Dongwoon said, taking the bags from me.

“What happened!? Why are all of you outside? Did something happen to him!?” I asked.

“Relax. He’s awake, so the doctor’s checking on him.” Doojoon smiled.

“He’s awake?” I asked.

“Yea. About ten minutes ago.” Hyunseung said.

“And the first thing he asked was ‘where is my Haneul?’” Seungho teased me.

I smiled and looked down. The doctor came out, telling us that he is okay, but he should be quite tired.

I went in and saw him with his eyes closed.

“How are you feeling?” I asked softly, sitting on the bed beside him.

“Liar.” He pouted.

“What?” I asked.

“You said I would see you the moment I open my eyes. But instead, all I saw were guys.” He said.

“Aww~ Is someone angry?” I poked his chest.

“Of course.” He said, trying to suppress his smile.

“Don’t be.” I tried to sound as cute as possible.

He pouted his lips. I lean in to kiss him. I could feel him smile in between the kiss.

“Ahem~ We’re.. still here.” Seungho said, coughing.

“Sorry Hyung.” Junhyung smiled.

“How are you feeling?” Doojoon asked.

“Drowsy.” Junhyung laughed.

“You’re like on drugs.” Yoseob said.

“I feel like that too.” Junhyung said.

“Hungry? Do you want to eat anything?” I asked.

“You.” He said.

“What?” I asked.

“I want to eat you.” He laughed.

“Oh my goodness.” The other boys said, looking away.

“Yong Junhyung!” I hissed, slapping his thigh.

He just laughed.

“You’re really high. It must be the morphine.” I said.

“Maybe.” He laughed.

“Stop laughing!” I whined.

“Alright. Oh my goodness. Let’s eat.” Seungho said.

We gathered around to eat while Junhyung just kept smiling and giggling. Everything we said seem to be like a joke to him. He eventually drifted off into sleep.

“He must be tired from all the ridiculous laughing as well as the medicine.” Doojoon said, adjusting the bed so Junhyung could sleep better.

“I guess so.” I said.

We continued to eat and chat while Junhyung snored behind us.

“You sure you don’t want us to stay so you can go back?” Kikwang asked.

“It’s fine. I can sleep here.” I said.

“But you’ve been up all day and you aren’t too well yourself.” Hyunseung said.

“I’m fine, really.” I smiled.

“Alright then. Call us if you’re tired yea. We’ll come.” Doojoon said.

“Sure. Go home safely, and good night.” I said to them.

“Don’t keep staring at him and not sleep.” Seungho teased me.

“Just go already!” I pushed him slightly.

After they left, I went to lie down on the couch. I closed my eyes, but wasn’t able to fall asleep.

“Haneul ah~” I heard Junhyung call.

I opened my eyes and turned to him. He smiled weakly at me.

“Why are you awake?” I asked, going to his side.

“I just happen to wake up.” He said.

“Still feeling high?” I asked, handing him a cup of water.

He smiled and giggled.

“Okay please don’t start laughing.” I said.

“Come here.” He said, moving to the side to make space for me.

I lied in his arms, resting my head against his chest.

“Does it hurt?” I asked, touching the tip of his fingers lightly.

“It’s numb.” He said.

“Can I ask you something?” I said.

“What?” He mumbled.

“Why do you keep hiding stuff from me? Do you not trust me?” I asked.

“How can you say that? I trust you, of course. Just that… I..” He trailed off.

“You what? I really want to know. I feel so useless and helpless all the time.” I said, looking up at him.

“I’m sorry.” He said.

“Don’t apologize. I just want to know.” I said.

“I don’t want to be a burden to anyone. Not to you, not to the boys, not to Seungho Hyung.” He said.

“But you’re not.” I said.

“I am. Just look at me.” He said.

“But I’m willing to spend time on you. It’s not a burden to me.” I said.

“I don’t mean to be hiding anything from you.” He said.

“Are you afraid that I would leave you like how your family did just because you are different and a little more troublesome than others?” I asked.

He stared at me with wide eyes. I knew I hit jackpot.

“You’re so dumb.” I said.

“I’m not that kind.” I said.

“I know.” He said.

“Then why?” I asked.

“I don’t know. It just naturally happened.” He said.

“Then from now on, please make relying on me a natural thing to do. I don’t want to be the only one relying on you while you suffer on your own.” I said.

“But it’s my duty to let you rely on me.” He said.

“You see our relationship as a duty?” I asked.

“No! Not that! Just that, I am a guy, and naturally I should be the pillar of strength for you, not the other way round.” He said.

“Do I care? To me, we have to be each other’s strength. Not just you alone or me alone. That isn’t a relationship anymore. I want to make memories with you; good and bad.” I said.

He looked at me and smiled.

“I want to be someone you can lean on confidently without feeling afraid. I want to be someone you can trouble without feeling embarrassed. I want to be someone who you can show the true Yong Junhyung to and not the one you portray.” I said.

“What am I going to do without you?” He said.

“I don’t know. “ I said.

“Thank you, Darling. You never fail to see through me and reassure me whenever I need it the most.” He said.

“You know I can see through you and yet you still dare to hide stuff from me?” I asked.

He pouted at me in response.

“I’m not going to get angry with you this time because I know I cannot blame you for behaving this way. But please, at least try to let yourself rely on me, okay?” I said.

“I’m already relying on you.” He rested his head on mine.

“That’s not relying. That’s call lying on me.” I laughed.

“It’s the same.” He laughed.

He held onto me tightly, not letting me move.

“Although I don’t blame you, I mean it when I say I’ll torture you.” I said.

“What are you going to do?” He asked.

“You’ll see.” I said.

“Don’t hit me.” He pleaded.

“I wouldn’t.” I smiled.

“Then what?” He asked.

“You’ll know. For now, sleep!” I said.

“So mean~” He whined.

“I never said I was kind. Alright, really! Sleep!” I said.

“Always leaving me hanging.” He mumbled.

“You’re not hanging. You’re lying down.” I said.

He mumbled something I couldn’t make out and drifted off into sleep.