Haneul’s POV

I was chatting with some other people when I happened to look over at the school. I met eyes with Junhyung. I thought he would look away, but he didn’t, instead, he continued staring. I rolled my eyes and turned away. Did I see a hint of sadness flash across his face? But I guess that wasn’t possible. He is out to irritate me now. He should have expected such response from me. I put those thoughts aside and continued with my work.

It was Jace who took me here three years ago. When I first came, I was pretty much disgusted by everything. I was always in a horrible mood, I kept to myself and I never spoke to anyone apart from Jace. Coming here, I saw a lot and experienced a lot. I felt so ashamed of myself for harboring suicide thoughts. What was a mere break up as compared to those people here? If not because of this place, I guess I wouldn’t be able to survive till today, therefore I am pretty much very attached to here.

As time passed, I started looking forward to trips here and even started coming without Jace. I was even trusted to bring teams of people here. The local volunteers could speak only minimum English but they never gave up trying to communicate with us. I made lots of friends here, but honestly I still miss the Beast and MBLAQ boys.

“The group of newbies you brought over are really hard working.” One of them told me as we set out the table for dinner.

“Really? Well, it’s just painting.” I said.

“They are done with the painting already. They are building the other part now.” He said.

My eyes widened and a smile crept onto my face unknowingly.

“Are they strong enough?” I asked.

“Well I guess only three of them are really strong? But the others are trying.” He laughed.

I nodded and continued to do what I was doing. At 7.30PM, everyone except Beast was back for dinner. Since no one was hungry yet, we just chatted while waiting.

“Sorry for being late.” They said, bowing as they hurried over.

They were sweaty and dirt all over them.

“It’s alright.” One of the volunteers said.

“So… We will have our meals here. We’re all equal, so there isn’t any special treatment regardless of who you are. I don’t care if you’re the president or if you have five hundred million fans worldwide, in here, we’re all the same.” I said, looking at Beast.

They looked down, except for Junhyung who stared hard at me. I felt sorry for treating them this way. It was childish of me to continue these games with Junhyung, but he started it.

“Well, but in any case if you really want special treatment, you’re free to take your food and go over there where no one would disturb you to eat.” I said, pointing behind at an empty area.

I expected Junhyung to snap at me but instead he just kept quiet. It was quite surprising thou considering the fact he never stopped stepping on me ever since we met again. Maybe he was tired. He does look extremely worn out.

“We enjoy eating with everyone. We’re not like this.” Yoseob said softly.

“I know. I’m just saying in case some other people might want to have their special treatment.” I smiled at him.

“Are you the leader only because they lack people? You don’t actually have what it takes, don’t you?” Junhyung mumbled.

I was about to snap back when I saw Kikwang’s pleading eyes.

“This isn’t luxury food but whatever edible here is really precious. Take only what you can finish. If you don’t think you would like the food, then don’t take at all.” I said, glaring at Junhyung.

The volunteers who have been here before are used to the food, but the faces of those who are here for the first time, including Beast spelt only shock. Whatever food we have on the table is really all we can serve; mixed vegetables curry and thick dough. There isn’t any rice or meat because there are none here. Even if there is, they are usually for the villagers.

“I know it doesn’t look appetizing but trust me, these are really filling and can give you enough energy. We may be tight on money, but we don’t starve our volunteers.” I said, trying to get those people to eat.

“This slab of whatever it is called, I call it dough, it may seem uncooked, but it actually tastes like those steamed buns, or rather it is steamed bun just that we don’t have it individually. Together with this curry, it’s really good.” I said.

“Try?” I said, handing a bit of the bun to Yoseob.

He smiled awkwardly and took it from me. He reluctantly put it into his mouth.

“Wah~ It’s really nice!” He said, covering his mouth to hide his smile.

“I told you right!” I said.

“You’re just hungry, Seob ah~” Junhyung mumbled.

“No, trust me Hyung, it’s good.” He said, handing some to Junhyung.

Junhyung looked at the bun, and then looked away.

“Try it.” I said.

He looked at me and scoffed.

“For all you know, later when we’re back slogging out backs out, she and the other so called leaders would have a feast.” He said.

I froze at what he said. I never knew he could say such hurting words.

Junhyung’s POV

She clenched her fist so tight I could hear her knuckles crack. She stood up and walked next to me, staring at me. I looked up at her.

“You know what, if you don’t wish to eat, then don’t. No one is forcing you. You can continue to starve yourself and turn into a skeleton for all I care. Then when you go back to Korea, your fans will be so heartbroken seeing their ‘oh so poor thing’ Junhyung oppa becoming so thin after coming here and then buy you lots of good food. But just in case anyone asks you what happened, please don’t forget to tell them that it is you and your narrow-mindedness that caused you to become skin and bones.” She said.

“Damn it, ask anyone who has been here more than once and they’ll tell you what kind of luxury this is. Don’t make it sound like we torture people here. This isn’t a boot camp. Everyone here came on their own accord. I gave you a choice. I asked you more than once if you wanted to leave, but you didn’t say anything. If you were expecting to live in a hotel, eat buffets for your meals and get treated like a king, I'm so sorry to disappoint you.” She grabbed a handful of the bun and slammed it onto my plate.

“Take it or leave it.” She said before walking away.

“I really hate how you are becoming, Hyung.” I heard Dongwoon mumble.  

Everyone else ate without mentioning what happened. After they left, it was just us left. I continued staring at my plate.

“Eat.” Doojoon commanded.

“Do I have to call Seungho?” He asked dangerously.

I looked at him. He glared back at me. I couldn’t defy him. He had the words ‘I AM YOUR LEADER’ engraved on his face.

I took a bit of the bun and tasted it. Indeed, it tasted like the steamed bun.

“I’m done.” Dongwoon said, walking away without looking back.

“Me too.” Kikwang and Yoseob said, leaving as well.

“I told you not to go overboard, didn’t I?” Doojoon said.

“I don’t know why I said those.” I mumbled.

“You’re having fun just because she isn’t flaring up like how she would in the past? Junhyung ah, it doesn’t work this way. You’re making her feel so miserable.” Hyunseung said.

“I know.” I said.

They left, leaving me to eat alone.

“Can we join?” Some of the local volunteers asked suddenly.

“Please.” I said.

“You don’t look familiar. Did you come with Skye?” One of them asked as she ate.

I nodded.

“She’s a sweet girl. So different from when she first came.” She said.

“Ah really?” I said.

Of course I know Haneul is sweet.

Everyone at the table seems to know Haneul and they were all smiles as they mentioned her. While they spoke, they not only eat on their own but they kept giving me food and made me feel as thou I was part of them at the same time.

“She was always crying herself to sleep at night when she first came. You know these huts aren’t sound proof like your homes back in Seoul and not all the time do we get individual spaces. Only Jace could console her. But slowly, the more she came, the more she opened up, she just kept on smiling.” One of them said.

“She’s really passionate about almost everything. Oh and this that you’re eating now, she made it.” He continued.

“She made this?” I asked.

“We are all busy. It’s not like she is very free, but that girl always has her ways to find time. We usually don’t have these vegetables to go along, but because you guys are here for the first time, she made it. These are the very few luxuries we can enjoy here. Thanks to you guys.” He said.

I felt like punching myself for saying those mindless words to hurt her just now.

“Thank you. I’m going to get back to work. Enjoy your dinner.” I said, bowing to them before leaving.

We continued with our work until it was dark. As I worked, I kept looking around, in hope to catch a glimpse of Haneul, but she was nowhere to be seen. That night, it was another person who told us how to use the toilets and where the shampoos and stuff were.

There wasn’t any hot water or proper concrete cubicles. The water that came out from the tap was really small. This kind of showering facilities was bad enough for a guy, I don’t know how the girls are going to cope. Or rather, I am amazed how Haneul actually managed to shower here. She was the most particular about toilets. She has changed so much, while I just got more childish.

“Dongwoon ah, can you pass me the shampoo?” I asked.

He threw it over and walked off. I would have yelled at him on a normal day, but I angered him first, I didn’t have the rights to get angry.

“Woon ah~” Doojoon frowned.

“What?” Dongwoon said, glaring at me as he walked out.

I gave up washing my hair. I hurriedly put on my clothes and went after him.

“Dongwoon ah! Dongwoon!” I caught up with him.

He stopped but did not look at me.

“I know I have been an . I’m sorry for acting that way. I didn’t mean it.” I said.

“Don’t apologize to me. It wasn’t me you hurt.” He said coldly.

“Dongwoon ah, please forgive Hyung.” I said.

“How can I accept your apology? You’re the Hyung. I’m just the maknae. You can treat Noona like this, what rights do I have to accept your apology?” He said.

His words are always the harshest but always the wake up call.

“I didn’t mean to act that way. I mean… It shouldn’t have become like this.” I said.

“Then fix it. For three years, you missed her like crazy. You almost went mad because you thought she died. All of us were having a hard time, but I know our pain could never be compared to yours. Noona was your life. I don’t understand, Hyung. Now that she is back and alive, shouldn’t you hold onto her tighter instead of giving her such treatment? Why did you convince us to come here? Have you forgotten your aim?” He said.

“I guess… I was pissed off when we overheard what she said to her leader.” I said.

“You think we aren’t? But more than anger, I think it is hurt. Then again, she isn’t wrong to say what she said. We are clueless to the work here. Coming here isn’t like being in Seoul.” He said.

“It was you who wanted to get her back, and now it is you who is pushing her away. Hyung, have you been watching too much Boys over Flowers? Noona isn’t like Geum Jan Di, so you shouldn’t be acting like as thou you are Gu Jun Pyo. This isn’t scripted. It is real. Whatever you’re doing will get you nowhere. Noona is tougher than that. She’ll just end up sending all of us back to Seoul, and when that day arrives, you can go on your knees, beg and cry, but I can bet with you all my savings, Noona will ignore you.” He said.

His words hit me like cold water.

“You’re not even proving to her that you want her back. You’re just showcasing the childishness in you to everyone. She is being really patient already, you know it, don’t you? She is giving us a lot of face and you should know why. I don’t mean you have to be all soft and quiet around her, but at least, while she leaves us some face, you should give her some too. She may be younger than you, but here, she’s more experienced and whether she has what it takes or not, I don’t know, but she’s still the leader.” He said.

I nodded slightly.

“Your shirt is overturned.” He mumbled before walking away.

I sat at the corner of our hut, looking outside. It’s past midnight already but Haneul is still not back. Where did she go? Is she okay? Have she eaten?

“Junhyung ah, sleep.” Doojoon said.

I shook my head.

“If you want to apologize, do it in the morning.” He said.

“But she’s still not back.” I said.

“She know this place better than you do. She’ll be fine. She went missing for three years and we still met, right?” He said.

“Come, sleep.” He forcefully pulled me to the mattress.

Haneul ah, sorry.

***
Awwww~ Before you start scolding Junhyung, *points down*

He acts like that in front of Haneul

But inside, he is actually like this