Junhyung’s POV

“Do you really think it’s necessary to go?” Seungho hyung asked as I was packing my stuff.

“What do you mean?” I asked, stopping whatever I was doing.

“I mean… If she wanted you to know, if she wanted you to be with her, she wouldn’t have just disappeared, would she?” He asked.

“Hyung, are you saying I shouldn’t go? Are you saying I am bothering too much? But hyung, she’s my girlfriend.” I said, looking at him.

“I am not saying you should not go, neither am I saying you bother too much. I totally get what you mean. I understand why your worries.” He said.

“Then?” I asked.

“I just feel that… for the exact reason why you left the hospital without a word that time, she disappeared without a word this time. Get what I mean?” He asked.

“So… I should stay? But… I am worried. I mean… I don’t know what is going on.” I reasoned.

“Go, if it will return you a piece of mind. But, know your ground.” He said.

“My ground?” I asked.

“Your purpose.” He said.

“Your role in her life is a boyfriend, and perhaps in the near future, husband. Likewise for her, she is your girlfriend, and perhaps, soon, wife. You’re not a policeman, neither are you a lawyer or a judge, do not interrogate her like she is some sort of criminal. At times I understand that you would get really anxious when you don’t have any answers and all you see are problems, but just be there. I don’t know what is going on, I don’t know how serious it is, but I know, if there is something troubling me, I would want that special someone to be here with me, because being here is enough.” He said.

I looked down, smiling to myself.

“Why are you smiling like that? Gosh, I did not just confess to you!” He yelled.

“No no no! What are you thinking, hyung!? I am just.. well.. wah~ She taught you well, didn’t she?” I asked.

“Who?” He asked.

“Not Haneul. You know who~” I poke his chest, the part where the heart lies.

His cheeks and ears reddened almost instantly.

“It’s basic common sense! You just don’t seem to have them that’s why you’re always screwing up!” He yelled.

“I screw up?” I looked at him, slightly hurt from that statement although I know he just was joking.

“I am just kidding, Junnie. Don’t take it to heart. I am so sorry. I don’t mean that you screw up as her boyfriend or what. You’re really amazing, just that Haneul is too tough. No no no what am I saying aghhh~” He hurriedly explain.

“I know you’re kidding, hyung. You’re fun to tease.” I laughed.

“I know I am not the best boyfriend, but I am trying, I mean, I really am. Sometimes I can’t help but feel apologetic towards her. All I brought her to her was problems and more problems.” I sighed.

“You brought her happiness as well please! Both of you have to stop feeling that you’re not suited for each other! If you’re not, you guys would not be back together goodness!” He exclaimed.

“Alright! I am like the best boyfriend she can ever ask for! What is Haneul without me!? Nothing!” I yelled.

“Exactly!” He slapped my chest.

“Actually, I said it wrong. It should be, what is Junhyung without Haneul? Nothing.” I said.

“My god~” Seungho hyung rolled his eyes as he headed for the door.

“Going off already!?” I yelled.

“Yea, I just came to say goodbye because who knows you might come back three years later or what.” He giggled.

“Oh, I am actually planning of not coming back anymore. So lucky for you to come say goodbye or else we may never meet again.” I said.

“Right. Stay there forever huh~ Have so much fun. Call me yea~” He said.

“Hyung, can I get you anything from Japan?” I asked.

He thought for awhile before breaking into a really wide smile. He is not thinking of weird stuff, is he?

“You know that really delicious Meiji snack? Those biscuits shaped in little pandas with either chocolate, strawberry or milk fillings.” He said.

“Oh. Hello Seungho?” I asked.

“What?” He asked.

“Hello Seungho, right? Those little panda biscuits.” I smiled.

“It’s called Hello Panda, you idiot.” He hissed.

“Alright, just those?” I asked, laughing.

“Yeap, just those.” He said.

“Hello Seungho for Seungho hyung~” I said out loud as I wrote down in my notebook.

“YAH!!! YOU RUDE THING!!! IT’S HELLO PANDA!!!!” Seungho hyung yelled, stomping out of our dorm, leaving me to laugh to myself like a fool.

***

Haneul’s POV

“Skye~” I felt an arm over my shoulder.

I looked over and smiled at whoever it was.

“Are you okay?” She asked.

“Why would I not be okay?” I asked.

“You only come to Japan when you’re feeling down.” She said.

“That’s not true!” I laughed.

But she was right.

“I know you~” She smiled, handing me a can of green tea.

“I am fine, just… You know~” I said, sipping on my drink.

“Boyfriend problem?” She asked.

I shook my head.

“We’re good.” I said.

“Alright. You know where to go if you want to talk?” She asked.

“Of course.” I smiled.

“Oh, Jace called just now.” She said.

“Jace? Did he say anything? Did something happen back home?” I asked anxiously.

“He just asked if you’re here. That’s all.” She said.

“Oh. Then did you tell him?” I asked.

She nodded.

“Thanks.” I smiled.

“You don’t want to call back?” She asked.

“I will. Later or something.” I said.

“How long is later? One hour later? Three days later? Ten years later?” A familiar voice said from behind my friend.

I looked behind, so did my friend. I spit out my drink dramatically.

“I take that as a hello.” Junhyung said, taking off his sunglasses.

I heard my friend gasp when Junhyung smiled. And honestly, I melted a little inside at his smile too.

“I’ll… I’ll… I’ll leave you two… to talk~” My friend said hurriedly before running away.

Junhyung watch her run off, and then look back at me.

“Why? Am I very ugly?” He asked, pouting slightly.

“Erm… You kind of look better in photos, with the makeup and all. Bare face…  Just a little disappointing. I mean, really, just a little bit.” I said, wiping my mouth.

“Alright. Point taken. I am not hurt. I really am not.” He rubbed his chest.

“Awww~” I got up and went to him.

“No. You are so stunningly handsome she had to run away before she starts drooling in front of you.” I whispered, giving him a soft kiss on his lips.

I felt his lips curl up into a smile.

“Why are you here?” I asked, sitting on the table.

“Do I need a reason to come see my runaway girlfriend?” He asked.

“Runaway girlfriend hahahaha!” I smacked his chest.

He caught my hand and stared deep into my eyes. Honestly, I felt a little embarrassed.

“What?” I asked, trying to look indifferent.

“What? Shouldn’t I be the one asking you this?” He said.

“You just disappeared without a word and ‘What?’ is all you say after so long?” He asked.

“It’s just a few days.” I mumbled, looking down.

“A few days is long to me!” He raised his voice.

I looked up, expecting to see his angry face but instead I saw his pout.

“Hee~ Sorry.” I pinched his lips.

“Why did you stop calling?” He said in between his pinched lips.

“I couldn’t.” I said.

“Where is your phone? Is even sending a text message so difficult?” He asked, pulling my hand away from his lips.

“I said, I couldn’t.” I said.

“Where is your phone?” He asked again.

“I don’t have it.” I said.

“Why? DID YOU GET ROBBED OR SOMETHING!? HUH!? ARE YOU HURT!?” He looked all over me.

“Relax crazy! Hahaha! Robbed!? What are you thinking? No! I did not get robbed!” I laughed, my turn to grab his hands.

“Eh, but come to think of it, I pretty much got robbed.” I said, thinking back what happened to my phone.

“WHAT!? DID YOU PHONE THE POLICE!? DID THE ROBBER HURT YOU!? WHY DIDN’T YOU CALL ME!?” He yelled.

“What could you do even if I called you? Even the police can’t do anything about it.” I said.

“What sort of lousy police cannot do anything about the robber!? How could they allow the robber to escape!? He would be out robbing other innocent people!” He shouted.

“True. And touching people’s butts.” I mumbled.

His eyes widened, his fists clenched tight.

“HE TOUCHED YOU!? HOW DOES HE LOOK LIKE!? DO YOU REMEMBER!? LET’S GO TO THE POLICE STATION! IF THE JAPAN ONE CAN’T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT, WE’LL GO BACK TO KOREA!” He pulled me off the table.

“Of course I remember how he looks like. You’ve seen him too. Maybe not him, but his friend.” I said.

“I’VE SEEN HIS FRIEND!? WHO!? HOW DOES HE LOOK LIKE!? DESCRIBE!” He yelled.

Junhyung’s POV

I cannot understand how she could still be smiling like nothing happened when she got touched and robbed. I am going to bash that idiot up if I ever see him! How dare he touch my girl!?

“He is pretty wide at the bottom, and he is white too.” She explained.

What a weird word choice to describe someone. And, he is white? I don’t have any western friends, not that I could remember. And neither of my friends has western friends too.

“What else?” I asked.

“Erm… That’s about all.” She said.

“How about his face!? How does he look like? His hairstyle? His eyes? His lips? His nose? How does he look like exactly!? You said I’ve seen him, describe and I may able to remember!” I said anxiously.

“Why not I take you to him?” She asked.

“Take me to him!? You know where he is!? Wait wait! Let’s call the police first!” I said, taking out my phone.

“It’s alright, Junroro.” She took my phone away.

“You can’t do anything about it.” She sighed.

“WHY!?” I yelled as she dragged me along.

“You just can’t.” She said.

“Why are you bringing me to the toilet!? I don’t need to go to the toilet!” I yelled.

“The criminal is here.” She kicked opened one of the cubicle door.

“Where?” I asked, looking at the empty toilet.

“THIS!” She pouted, pointing at the toilet bowl.

“Lionny, it’s not funny!” I yelled, feeling pissed.

“OF COURSE I KNOW IT’S NOT FUNNY! I DON’T FIND IT FUNNY TOO! I WATCH MY PHONE GOT SWALLOWED BY THIS DAMN THING! HOW IS IT FUNNY!?” She yelled.

“You mean, the wide and white fellow, is this?” I pointed to the toilet bowl.

“Isn’t it right!? It is wide, and white!” She explained.

“And the one that touched your is this too?” I asked.

“I DON’T PEE STANDING!” She yelled, giggling slightly.

I sighed and covered my face. She just prank me again, didn’t she? But I am thankful it was a prank, honestly.

“Do you know how worried I was!?” I yelled, but couldn’t hide my laughter.

“I wasn’t lying.” She said.

“You…!!” I was lost for words. She indeed wasn’t lying.

“So what happened!?” I asked.

“I stood up and my phone fell in. My hand worked faster than my eyes did so…~” She pressed down onto the flush.

“Bye bye phone.” She pouted.

I laughed out trying to picture the scenario.

“It’s not funny okay!” She yelled, slapping my arm.

“Sorry sorry.” I hugged her.

“You could have gotten a new phone, or borrowed someone else’s. Do you know how worried I was when you stopped contacting us?” I said.

“I told you I am working. If anything were to happen, you guys would know.” She said.

“Still~ How can I not worry when I don’t know if my darling is doing fine or not?” I said, cupping her cheeks.

“Let’s go out before someone sees you here.” She said, holding my hand.

I panicked after hearing what she said. How come it did not occur to me that I am in a female’s toilet!?

“How could you pull me into the ladies?” I hissed, hurrying out with her.

“Why not?” She asked.

“Why yes? I am a man! Goodness!” I said.

“Who said man cannot go into the ladies toilet?” She asked.

“What did you just say?” I asked.

She pointed at the sign behind. I turned to look and mentally slapped myself. It was a shared toilet.

“You seriously think I would do that to you?” She laughed, walking off.

“How would I know!? Then why do you say I should go out before someone sees me!?” I asked, catching up with her.

“It is a shared toilet, not a shared cubicle. We’re together, but how ugly would it look to see Korea’s beloved rapper in the same cubicle with his girlfriend. We may be doing nothing but discussing the stupid toilet bowl but in the eyes of others it may not be the case. It is fine for me because I am nobody to the public, but how ugly would it reflect on you, no? I saved your you know~” She said, smacking my .

“I..” I mumbled, not knowing what to say.

Why does she always seem to make sense? Or is it because I just go weak whenever it comes to her?

“So, where are you staying?” She asked.

“Oh. I don’t know.” I said.

“You came here without booking a hotel?” She asked.

I shook my head.

“Just marvelous, Yong Junroro!” She said.

“I expect you to take me in.” I said.

“And what if you couldn’t find me?” She asked.

“I would find you.” I said.

“How confident~” She scoffed.

“Of course. I had Jace ask where you were before coming.” I said.

“Oh no wonder that idiot called. I thought he was worried or something hur~” She said.

“They are worried, okay?” I said.

“Where are your stuff? Please don’t tell me you expect to wear my clothes.” She said.

“Of course not. Which part of your clothes would my body fit into?” I asked.

“Yea right! You fitted into my shorts, you skinny ! It was even loose damn it! And my shirts fit you perfectly well except for the fact it is too short! Don’t you dare bring up this topic again!” She shouted, pointing at me.

I stayed over at her place once and had nothing to change into. Jace was asleep already so we did not want to wake him up just to get clothes. She shoved me her t-shirt and shorts, asking me to try them on. I refused but she was persistent that I could fit.

But the only reason why I could fit into her shorts was because of the rubber band. And because of that she kept grumbling about how fat she is and accused me of embarrassing her. Know better than to argue back, I could only pout at her. It wasn’t my idea to wear her clothes in the first place, and she isn’t fat, just big boned or something. She is the right size in my eyes. Still, be it big boned or whatever, she is still my Haneul.

“I did not bring it up. And besides it’s natural that girls have bigger hips.” I mumbled.

“Say what!?” She yelled.

“I am sorry! I’ll eat more from now on so I will burst your shorts with my fatty !” I said, not planning on bringing up anything to upset her.

“Good! Better stick to what you said! I expect you to tear my clothes like Hulk the next time you try put them on!” She laughed.

“I will paint myself green as well.” I said.

“Be sure!” She poked my stomach.

“Let’s go.” She said, helping me with my bag.

“Where are we going?” I asked, taking my bag as well as hers from her.

“Don’t you want to know where you would be staying?” She asked.

“Then why are we going out? Aren’t we staying here?” I looked around.

“Where in the middle of this empty plot of land do you expect to stay? Behind that tree? Inside that bush?” She asked.

“Doesn’t all volunteers stay on site?” I asked, looking around.

“Volunteers? What do you see here that we’re working on!? Are there any kids that you can see and I can’t? Or any other people that seemed to need help you can see but I can’t?” She laughed.

“Then what are you here for?” I asked.

“We’re planning to work something, but not yet.” She said, bidding goodbye to whoever that was around as she led me out.

“I am confused.” I admitted.

“Don’t bother to think so much. It is not important.” She said, shoving me into a cab.

“So where are we going?” I asked.

“To the hotel, where else?” She asked.

“You guys are staying in a hotel?” I asked.

“Why? Are you jealous because you didn’t get to stay in the hotel in Kenya? You did, okay? You had an extra night in the hotel as compared to others.” She said.

“Why would I be jealous? I mean, I am just surprised.” I said.

“If we don’t stay in hotels, where do you expect us to stay? We’re planning on site, but we have no place to stay there unless we sleep on the tables and use newspaper as our blankets. It’s going to be pitiful but at the same time quite a sight.” She said.

“We can afford a hotel because we’re a smaller group this time, the rest are locals. Usually we stay in hostels.” She continued.

“Oh.” I said, despite still slightly confused.

“It’s alright. Don’t bother yourself with it.” She laughed, linking her arm with mine.

When we arrived, she looked at me.

“Do you want a room to yourself?” She asked.

“You mean… I can’t share a room with you?” I asked.

“I did not say that. I am asking you, just in case you want some privacy or invite some girls dressed in bunny suits over or something like that behind my back, you know~” She winked.

“The only bunny girl I want to see is you.” I said.

“What do you take me for?” She asked.

“A mix breed of a lion and a rabbit! How many times do I have to repeat myself?” I asked.

She opened and closed . She had nothing to say.

“Nothing to say?” I .

“You’re sleeping outside my room.” She mumbled.

“Aww no! Pwease! Junroro would be cold!” I tried to aegyo.

She looked at me with a disgusted face.

“Just let me in!” I grumbled, grabbing her hand and pulling her into the lift.

She burst into laughter while I just stared at her.

“I don’t understand why all your fans want to see your aegyo. If they seen the real thing, I am sure they’ll go ‘DON’T DO IT!’ whenever the aegyo nerve in you snap or something!” She laughed.

Like as if I wasn’t embarrassed enough.

***

After putting down my stuff, we went out. She took me to eat and shop around, showing me the place because it is my first time in this part of Japan, Toyama.

“Tonight, I’ll bring you to see something really spectacular.” She said, chewing onto the red bean pancake.

“What?” I asked.

“You’ll see. It’s a sight you’ll never forget.” She smiled.

We continued to walk around until midnight.

“So what is the spectacular thing?” I asked, yawning, feeling slightly sleepy from the flight and everything else.

“You’re sleepy? You want to go back?” She asked, a hint of disappointment in her voice.

“No no. I am not sleepy.” I said.

“But you yawned.” She said.

“It’s a habit.” I came up with a lame excuse.

“Habit? I see~” She laughed.

She looked at her watch, and then tugged me along. She hail for a cab and pushed me in.

“You can sleep on the way. It’ll take quite awhile. One hour or so~” She said, pushing my head to rest against her shoulder.

“Good bam~” I mumbled, snuggling closer to her.

“Are you Kikwang?” She laughed.

“I am smarter.” I mumbled.

“True.” She patted my cheek lightly.

***

“Wake up~ Wake up~~” She shook me slightly.

“Mmm~” I buried my face into her neck, not wanting to wake up at all.

“Wake up, Junroro. Quick, you can sleep again later.” She said.

I opened my eyes slightly to see the cab driver smiling at me while Haneul’s cheeks were just red.

She paid the driver and pulled me out.

“Sorry. I was in a deep sleep.” I mumbled, rubbing my eyes.

“I know.” She smiled.

“How do you know?” I asked.

“You were snoring damn loudly. It would be cute if we were alone, but on the cab, oh my god~ Both the cab driver and I literally jumped a little.” She laughed.

“Are you serious?” I asked.

She nodded slightly.

So this is why her cheeks were so red and the cab driver was smiling.

“Why didn’t you wake me up?” I covered my face.

“I tried to cover your mouth to quiet you a bit but I failed miserably.” She laughed.

“Don’t worry. He doesn’t know you’re Beast’s rapper.” She stuck out her tongue.

“Why are we at the beach?” I asked, looking around.

“And gosh it’s 2.30AM?!” I yelled as I saw the time.

“Yes. Sit down.” She said, pulling me to sit on the sand.

“I thought you said you want to show me something spectacular? Is it here? Where?” I asked, looking around.

“Good things come to those who wait.” She smiled.

“Alright. We’ll wait, if you say so.” I said.

“Oh, before I forget.” I reached into my bag and handed her the stack of letters.

“You didn’t have to bring these here, but thanks.” She said, looking at them.

She frowned slightly when she saw the one from the law firm. It was the only letter from the stack that she tore open. I was curious, but I remembered Seungho hyung’s words. I watch her from the side as she looked at the content. I could sense her anger just by sitting beside her. She was clenching onto the side of the paper till it was so crumpled.

“What is it?” I asked, in hope I did not sound like I was interrogating her.

She did not answer.

“Lionny~” I called out.

“Huh?” She looked at me with a forced smile.

“What is it?” I asked.

“What is what?” She asked.

I pointed at the letter.

“Oh. Some advertisement. Law firm these days~ Haha~” She shoved the letter into her bag.

“Advertisement?” I asked, despite knowing it is not.

Haneul could come up with a better lie than this, even when she is in a state of panic.

“Yea. About divorce and other legal stuff. I am not even married and they are asking if I want a divorce. They must be short of business or something like that these days to take such extreme measures in advertising.” She laughed.

“I see.” I mumbled.

We sat on the sand in silence. I occasionally stole glances at her. She had that murderous look on her face. If I were just a passerby, I would avoid even walking pass her with that look on her face. I must have dozed off halfway because the next thing I knew, I was roughly shook.

“WAKE UP!!! JUNRORO WAKE UP!!! QUICK!!!” She shouted, literally dragging me by my arms.

I opened my eyes, still confused as to what was happen.

“Stand up! Hurry! Use some freaking strength!” She pulled me to stand up.

“What? What?” I asked, still groggy from my sleep.

“LOOK!!” She patted my cheeks to wake me up before turning my head to face the water.

The sight made my jaw dropped. Glowing blue things filled along the shore of the entire beach.

“Spectacular?” She asked, smiling. This smile was genuine.

“What in the world is that?” I asked, walking closer to take a better look.

“These are firefly squids.” She said.

“So are they fireflies or squids?” I asked.

“They are squids! They got their name because they glow, like fireflies!” She laughed.

“Does this happen every day?” I asked, still amazed by its sight.

“Nope! From March to May only. I actually plan to bring you here to see this some other time, but I guess we’re lucky today, you’re here, and it’s time.” She smiled.

“But why are they so near the shore? Shouldn’t they be in the water?” I asked, feeling curious.

“Curious like a three year old, aren’t you?” She said, pulling me to sit down.

“Just want to know~” I mumbled, still admiring the sight in front of me.

Haneul’s POV

“They glow to attract prey or to attract mates. But at this time, the squids gather here to lay their eggs. Once their eggs are released into the water and fertilized, the squid begins to die. It marks the end of their one year life.” I explained.

“It dies after a year!?” He sounded shocked.

“Yea.” I said.

“But why!? It’s so pretty!” He pouted like a kid.

“Every living thing dies, it’s just a matter of time.” I said, pulling him closer to me.

“So what? Do people gather here to watch them die?” He asked.

“Why? Are you feeling bad already?” I laughed.

Sometimes, Junhyung is just like an innocent child.

“But at least, they don’t die forgotten. You and I and everyone else present here today will remember this spectacular sight, no?” I said.

He nodded, still pouting slightly.

“Come on, stop pouting! I didn’t bring you here to upset you!” I poked his cheek.

“I just feel sad for the squids!” He said, looking so sad.

“You remind a lot of Tae Hyun at times.” I laughed, hugging him.

“Honestly, when my friend took me here for the first time and explain to me about it, I felt exactly like you did. How come we are all gathered here to watch them die? Does it even make sense? Where is our heart? Why are we so happy?” I said.

“And then slowly realized, aren’t we all like the squid? Our life is just like a performance for people to watch. Although we have a longer life span, but we will still die some day. And everyone else alive will be watching us die, it is not something they can prevent anyway, even if they turn away and don’t look. Does that make them heartless too? Well, some will rejoice if we die, some will be devastated. But what is most important, to me at least, is to live a life worth remembering, in a good way.” I said.

“So I guess, if you think like a squid, you wouldn’t get offended at the fact we humans are here to watch them die? At least at their very last breath, they are putting up a spectacular show for us. They may die, but we, those alive, will always remember them.” I continued.

“What if the squid is actually offended?” He asked, teasing me.

“I interviewed the squid. They say they are not offended. I have solid evidence. Do you want me to go look for my squid friend to verify?” I played along with him.

“Okay, go bring him here.” He said.

“He’s dead, sadly. One year life span, remember? His dying words to me were ‘I lived well. Thank you for coming. In my next life, I want to be human so I can be with you openly’. ” I said.

“Openly?” He asked.

“Sorry I two-timed you. But the squid really liked me and I really liked him. I thought since he only has one year to live, I should fulfill his wish, no?” I asked.

“So is this why you came to Japan this time?” He asked, rubbing his forehead.

“Yes. I am sorry.” I said.

“Where is he!? I want to cook him alive!” He said, stomping towards the sea.

“He’s dead already!” I laughed, running behind him.

We strolled the beach, admiring the sight before heading back to the hotel. I was wide awake, but he was dead tired. It was written all over his face.

He was snoring beside me but I could not sleep at all. I took out the letter and read it over and over again. Does she have to do this? What good does it do to all of us? I don’t even wish to go to court with her. I wasn’t afraid of losing, but I was afraid of something else. Why is this happening when things are at its best?

Junhyung’s POV

I was awoken by the sound of sniffing. I opened my eyes and looked around. Haneul wasn’t beside me. I was alone, so where did the sniffing come from? And where is Haneul? I sat up and the side light. I saw Haneul sitting at the balcony, hugging her knees.

I got off bed and walked towards her. I stood behind her, watching her cry. As much as I wanted to know what was going on, I did not want to annoy her. The fact she cried alone simply means she does not want me to see her tears. But I couldn’t stand just watching and not doing anything.

“It’s alright. Cry, I am here.” I whispered into her ear, hugging her tightly.

“Did I wake you?” She asked in between her sobs.

“No, you did not. Just cry, it’s fine. You don’t have to tell me anything if you don’t want. Just let me hold you like that.” I said, rubbing circles into her back.

She sobbed for quite a while before wiping her tears on my sleeve and pulling away from me. Her bloodshot eyes and dark circles stood out against her pale face.

“Are you feeling better?” I asked, wiping away a tear that flowed down her cheek.

“My head hurts.” She mumbled, pressing her palms against her temples.

“Come.” I said, pulling her back to the bed.

“Close your eyes.” I said.

I let her lie on my lap as I massaged her head.

“You know I am here for you, no matter what happens.” I said.

“I have to admit I really want to know what is going on with you but I don’t wish to force you to tell me things you don’t want to say. I know you would tell me if you wanted but …” She cut me off by handing me the letter.

“Read it, and you’ll understand. I was going to tell you, just not yet. But I guess hiding from you any longer would just make matters worse.” She said, sitting up.

I took the letter from her and read it. My jaw dropped and my fists clenched tightly onto the paper. Now I know why she was feeling so pissed. I am feeling pissed too. There are all sorts of people in this world, isn’t it? And for some strange reason, people who don’t understand what it means by appreciation takes up a really high percentage of the population.

“When did you know about this?” I asked.

“The night after you left, I went out to buy some stuff. I met her. She slapped and threatened me.” She said.

“She slapped you!?” I yelled, raging with anger.

“Yea, but that’s not the point. She can slap me all she want, I don’t really care. Just… This… I actually don’t care about this too. I just…” She mumbled.

“So what are you going to do about this?” I asked, trying to calm myself down.

“Nothing.” She said.

Her reply made me really upset.

“She is suing you for something you did on her behalf, Haneul! Are you crazy!? How can you not care!? She came back after three years accusing you of kidnapping Tae Hyun and Ji Eun when you were the one who took up the responsibility she conveniently left at the airport without complain! How is this fair!? What are you afraid of?! Sue her, we can win this!” I yelled.

“Nothing is fair, Junhyung! She can sue me all the want! I don’t care! But don’t you see the point here!?” She yelled back.

“I only see you being afraid of something you did not do!” I shouted.

She laughed and shook her head.

“I am not suing her back, neither am I going to do anything about it, okay?” She said.

“WHY!? I thought you love them huh!? How can you give them up so easily!?” I yelled.

Her expression turned into a gangster-ish one.

“You said it didn’t you? I love them, that’s why I am doing nothing. And I thought of all people you would understand why I am doing this.” She said.

"You think I am afraid of her? What did I do wrong? Like you said, I took up the responsibility she conveniently left off for three years without complain. I have witnesses and evidences. I can hold onto everything and fight my way through. But so what if I win? Don’t you see that neither of us is the point here?” She said.

“What would happen to Tae Hyun and Ji Eun if we pursue the case in court? They would have to go through the questioning and stuff, and for heaven’s sake they are still babies! You want me to let them go out in court and make them choose between me, a stranger or their blood related mother!? Do you think I can do it!? Even if their custody is given to me at the end of the day, do you think I can smile after knowing how much hurt I have inflicted on them in order to get them!?” She grabbed my shirt.

“Do you think I want to give them up!? Do you think I want to do nothing!? Do you think I am not troubled!? But what can I do!? Their childhood is ruined enough! Why must we inflict more harm onto them!?” She screamed into my face.

“But you would lose them if you don’t do anything!” I yelled.

“I rather lose them physically than to lose them in soul! I don’t want such things to scare them so much that they lose themselves! At least, I can still see go look for them, but if I put them through that, they would be so traumatized. I, who claim to love them so much, would be the murderer of their innocent soul! Do you get it, Yong Junhyung!? Do you!?” She shouted, pushing me hard against the wall, her elbow at my throat.

“I love them. I cannot bear to let them go too. But what can I do? I don’t want to kill them again. It wasn’t easy getting Tae Hyun to smile again. It wasn’t easy opening Ji Eun up to people. I rather lose, than to see them in pain.” She said, crying all over again.

“I am sorry. I was too blinded by my own anger. I am sorry.” I said, pulling her into my embrace.

“You think I don’t want to fight? I would, if I could. I know I would win. Of course. But I would lose something else more important in return for my victory, and I don’t want that to happen.” She cried.

“Alright, I get it. I am sorry.” I held onto her.

 “It’s not easy to let them go, Junroro. It ing hurts. If letting her slap me ten thousand times can resolve this, I would let her slap me. The thought of them leaving me, it hurts like crazy! I don’t know how I am going to survive without them! It’s only three years but they are like my life!” She cried.

“I am sorry.” I mumbled, rubbing circles onto her back. I felt pretty embarrassed at my own outburst. Haneul is indeed a better parent than I am. I have a long way to learn.

I was crying myself. I couldn’t imagine going to the orphanage and not being able to see Tae Hyun and Ji Eun again. We just got closer, especially Ji Eun and I. She just called me Appa. I was planning to adopt them together with Haneul. And then suddenly their proclaimed mother has to appear. Not only is she not thankful for Haneul’s selflessness, she wants to sue. How dare she even appear? How dare she even think of suing? Bloody . 

***

Just in case some of you have not seen this oh so freaking delicious biscuit before! Here you go, Hello Seungho ^^ Raise you hands those who have not eaten this before! This author here will buy it for you!! It's a must-eat! Well, to me at least hee XD

Junhyung: Why? Am I very ugly!?

Junhyung realizing he got prank by Haneul, again~

Haneul having fun pranking Junhyung~

Firefly squid. So beautiful right!?

Junhyung: Bloody .