Love is a Beautiful Thing
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Title (3/5)
Let me tell you a story. On a sunny day, I was sitting in front of my laptop and I scrolled down the 'baeksoo' tag, then I saw the story, your story and honestly, I am not going to click on it. Okay, okay, Love is a Beautiful Thing is a nice and romantic title, but it's not quite interesting. How about changing it to something a bit more eye catching? But I did give you points because 'baeksoo's love is a beautiful thing' XD
Graphics (0/5)
Because there are no graphics for this story, full marks cannot be rewarded.
Description and Foreword: (7/10)
The description is quite amusing. I can sense the 'humor aura' going around this fan fiction. It was simple, but it gives me a lot of feeling and I love authors who write short length sentences, yet can make us feel lots of things. (?) The foreword, what Umeda sensei said was inspiring, (well, at least to me). Though the dialogues are not needed at all, but if you really read through it, you will eventually find that little message you are trying to give us. Well, if you meant it that way.
Story Layout: (4/5)
There's not much going on in the story layout. You don't have any special fonts or colors but it is alright. It's a short length story after all. I guess the story layout is fine.
Plot: (22/30)
The plot is something I'm kinda confused of. I know how you deliver everything well, judging by the comments. I understand how Kyungsoo moved to his mother who has lots of things going on. I understand how Kyungsoo confessed before Baekhyun did. But that is all. After reading all of the chapters, I know what is going on, but I didn't feel satisfied by it. I felt like there's something I'm missing. (Mind explaining? :)) It may be just my mistake for not running my eyes to every single sentences in it. Tell me if I'm wrong. But overall, the plot is common, but yeah.. it's a nice story.
Characterization: (10/10)
It's a six length chapters, and I understand every characters well. Good job!
Content Description (9/10)
The places, the times, you did a great job again :)))
The places, the times, you did a great job again :)))
Flow: (3/5)
However, the flow, I'm not liking it so much. I don't quite feel the feelings involve around Baekhyun and Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo returned and he met Baekhyun, and I was having high expectation about how are they going to react, I mean, what will happen when they met again but... i'm sorry but I don't quite like the feeling of feeling nothing. Of course, there's process, but their encounters, all of it are moments and I was having a big hope on those... :') But honestly, the flow is fine.
However, the flow, I'm not liking it so much. I don't quite feel the feelings involve around Baekhyun and Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo returned and he met Baekhyun, and I was having high expectation about how are they going to react, I mean, what will happen when they met again but... i'm sorry but I don't quite like the feeling of feeling nothing. Of course, there's process, but their encounters, all of it are moments and I was having a big hope on those... :') But honestly, the flow is fine.
Grammar: (5/10)
I'm confused again. I don't quite know what tense are you using. Past or present. These have to be fixed. I suggest you to hire a beta reader. It will be very helpful. Because there're times when it's a past tense, but then it changes into present. I hope you can fix it :) But spelling mistake is a no-no and your vocabulary is wide but simple and easy to understand which is really good.
I'm confused again. I don't quite know what tense are you using. Past or present. These have to be fixed. I suggest you to hire a beta reader. It will be very helpful. Because there're times when it's a past tense, but then it changes into present. I hope you can fix it :) But spelling mistake is a no-no and your vocabulary is wide but simple and easy to understand which is really good.
Taste of the Story: (8/10)
The story is damn good. The last conversation got me screams. 'You.' And I was like *faint* I've thought of stopping in chapter 2 but then I saw the comments of your readers squealing about the define love for me or something like that and that has caught my interest again. Overall, very nice and fluffy yet still angsty. Thumbs up!!! Just... remember, the grammar. :)
The story is damn good. The last conversation got me screams. 'You.' And I was like *faint* I've thought of stopping in chapter 2 but then I saw the comments of your readers squealing about the define love for me or something like that and that has caught my interest again. Overall, very nice and fluffy yet still angsty. Thumbs up!!! Just... remember, the grammar. :)
TOTAL: (71/100)
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