y Secrets
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y secrets
Two men most important to me in life.
One is my friend with benefits ; One is my brother.
What happens when my two worlds collide and my y secrets come out to play?
Will I survive everything life throws at me? ; Will I be able to get my own way?
One is my friend with benefits ; One is my brother.
What happens when my two worlds collide and my y secrets come out to play?
Will I survive everything life throws at me? ; Will I be able to get my own way?
REVIEWED BY: chubbybaek
Title (2.5/5)
The title seems bland and is rather uninviting. It doesn't have something that catches readers' interest. Try to come up with another title that sounds more enthralling than this one. And there's something you should take note of. The words used in title must have capital letters on each letter of the words. And NO full stop at the end.
Graphics (4/5)
The colors mix really well with each other, they express the angst feeling on the poster. It literally gets act together with the storyline.
Description and Foreword: (9/10)
The description is really well-written. It gives a little synopsis of what the story is about like a novel and gives the come-on of readers' eagerness in reading your story with the questions you made there.
Story Layout: (5/5)
Many would enjoy reading your story. It's organized really well. Sometimes you would unread what you're currently reading if you find the way an author writes the chapters is quite recklessly, even if the plot catches your eyes. But you're not that author.
Plot: (26/30)
There are actually several stories that have the same plot as this, but from all of I've read, yours has the most unexpected plot twists. Though the twists are pretty clichéd, I didn't expect them to come right after something good came to both Sehun and Haerin. It was really unexpected.
There are actually several stories that have the same plot as this, but from all of I've read, yours has the most unexpected plot twists. Though the twists are pretty clichéd, I didn't expect them to come right after something good came to both Sehun and Haerin. It was really unexpected.
The angst was so deep that I shed some tears at some scenes. It wasn't original but nevertheless, it still broke my heart. Oh, and I love how you wrote the ! It was really detailed, naughty and hawt! Sometimes I had to skip some parts because the couple was too hardcore. Bless my mind. Lol.
Characterization: (8/10)
The way you characterized the characters are done pretty well. There was more showing than telling, which is good because it helps readers grasping and realizing how the characters really are. Because you only focused more on Haerin, sometimes I didn't understand what Sehun was trying to do. Since the both of them are the main characters here, so I think you should have written Sehun's point of view.
Content Description (9/10)
The choices of words that you chose to help us interpreting the scenes and settings are easily understood and enjoyable to read. There are a few stories in aff which have crazy vocabs and many (who don't really master in English) confused and have to look up in dictionaries which is pretty time-consuming.
Flow: (2/5)
I'll give you 2 out of 5 because everything, literally everything, happened too fast. The of the story already started in chapter 5 and then they made up, fought again and made up, fought again and made up. I hate to admit this but I don't agree with them getting married though. They were so young but that's not the only point. They had just been together like for months and right after their argument was solved out, Sehun proposed to her. It could be better if you wrote some filler chapters like going on a date, or other romantic scenes that pop in your mind instead of putting some drama on every chapter.
I'll give you 2 out of 5 because everything, literally everything, happened too fast. The of the story already started in chapter 5 and then they made up, fought again and made up, fought again and made up. I hate to admit this but I don't agree with them getting married though. They were so young but that's not the only point. They had just been together like for months and right after their argument was solved out, Sehun proposed to her. It could be better if you wrote some filler chapters like going on a date, or other romantic scenes that pop in your mind instead of putting some drama on every chapter.
Grammar: (10/10)
No major grammar errors at all, every sentence is very well written.
No major grammar errors at all, every sentence is very well written.
Taste of the Story: (7/10)
y Secrets is a great story with the most unexpected plot twists ever even though I sometimes found it boring because of the twists. Nevertheless, it's still a great story to release all your ual frustration. You're so good in writing !
y Secrets is a great story with the most unexpected plot twists ever even though I sometimes found it boring because of the twists. Nevertheless, it's still a great story to release all your ual frustration. You're so good in writing !
Overall, I enjoy reading this. I just hope it didn't flow very fast. Anyways, keep on writing and fighting! :D
TOTAL: (82.5/100)
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