5 Advantages of Dating a Policeman
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Title (2.5/5)
I am kinda disappointed with the title. It is very long, ineffective and uncool. It doesn't attract readers to read more of it. It was better if it could be like 'The Perks of Dating a Policeman'. They are both long, but the latter looks rather title-like than the original one. The way you wrote the title is basically like you're writing an essay or a tutorial.
Graphics (5/5)
The graphic literally blows me away. It is so awesome and has that comedy aura just by looking at it. I have nothing to say because it indeed looks so cool!
Description and Foreword: (8/10)
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That simple description is such a turn-on for everyone. With that 'Is Luhan a bad or good cop?', everyone knows exactly what this story mostly contains of. Yes, , , , and . Though it's really plain, but I guess it won't be risky, cause it's just a one-shot. No?
Story Layout: (3/5)
I strongly suggest you edit it some more. The description should be more organized. But aside from all of that, the chapters are all enjoyable to read.
Plot: (27/30)
For me, this story doesn't have a clear plot. I'm not really sure of what you meant, what the main plot is. Is it about the gang thing or is it only about the ? From my point of view or maybe everybody else's, it must be the . Why? Readers who are fond of tend not to really care about anything as long as there are scenes and just go with the flow.
I love the jokes you made there. I cracked up at every single one of them. Not really the best comedy story I've read, but it's really hilarious. I can't stop laughing at Lay and Luhan's dumb conversations and actions. Both Luhan and Aerin's interactions were also cute and funny.
Characterization: (9/10)
Luhan is such a lovely boyfriend. He's funny and has a very good sense of humor. Despite his dirty mind and selfishness wanting them to be alone, he seems shy when he is with Aerin. She is the one who always initiates it, am I right? Or not? I envy Luhan and Aerin's relationship. They were romantic but sometimes childish. They care for each other and love each other so much. That kind of relationship is what everyone aims for. But then, the reality .
Lay.... is he really dumb or is he dumb? He's so crazy and hilarious at the same time haha!
Content Description (8/10)
There is no problem of interpreting the story. The words you used were easily understood although there were some scenes that were pretty confusing. Are you perhaps a newbie of writing ? Your didn't give any feeling of being . It didn't increase readers' ual desires either. It was like I'm reading Biology. It wasn't so bad, but it still lacked of the feeling.
Flow: (5/5)
The story is like occuring in our daily life, without so many dramas and all. This story doesn't have any drama so I guess the flow is fine.
The story is like occuring in our daily life, without so many dramas and all. This story doesn't have any drama so I guess the flow is fine.
Grammar: (10/10)
There were only some minor mistakes such as typos. Beside that, I didn't find any grammar errors.
There were only some minor mistakes such as typos. Beside that, I didn't find any grammar errors.
Taste of the Story: (8.5/10)
I'm terribly sorry if I offend you or being so harsh on you, I'm just speaking out my mind. Keep writing! (P.s. you're so good at writing comedy fics) ;)
Your story is the first action comedy fiction that i've read. It literally refreshed my mind. I can't say I don't like it because your story is indeed awesome and hilarious. Each of their conversations always crack me up. But overall, you did a great job!
TOTAL: (85/100)
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