Title:Numb (Part 10)
Pairings:JunxNino
Genre:Angst
Rating:G
Disclaimer:I own nothing but the plot
Word Count:1291
Summary:Was it because I needed to feel loved again?

I’ve lost count of how many times I cried since my encounter with Jun on the roof. I must be tiring him for being such a clingy bastard, but my arms refused let him go. It was as if my body and my mind all worked together for the sake of comfort. As much as I hated myself right now, a small part of me was glad for once that it was Jun and not a shrink paid to drill ideas into my head.

“Are you alright now?” Jun asked me once I finally let him go. “Do you want me to stay with you?”

I shrugged carelessly since I was unsure of how I should answer. Physically, I was alright, but inside everything’s a huge mess. But I could hear a small voice in between the chaos, telling me to let Jun stay. Stupid head. I shouldn’t be hearing those thoughts right now.

“I guess I’m fine...” I mutter under my breath.

“Ok. Stay here and I’ll make breakfast... Just...”

I scrunched my eyebrows curiously when I heard Jun’s voice. It was fine three minutes before, but he sounded like the wind was knocked out of him. Before I could question him, however, he was already on his feet and was halfway out the door when I finally noticed something was wrong.

Instead of a house attire, Jun wore a formal clothing. His face seemed pale when he briefly paused by the door frame, and there were beads of sweat pouring down his face. To make it more strange, the space on the bed seemed wet as if--

I remember now. It was just yesterday and I hated myself for forgetting. Jun risked his health just for me and even brought me to his home without a hot shower and dry clothes to wear. Instead, he’s the one who took care of me all last night and it seems he didn’t have time to take care of himself.

“Jun...” I breathed as I sat up at the edge of the bed. “Do you--”

“I’m fine, Nino. Just stay there... I’ll--”

I ran to him right when I noticed that his eyes began to falter. It was stupid of me for not noticing that he was sick just because of me... I’m beginning to think I’m just a bother to him.

“Nino, seriously, just--”

“Shut up,” I hissed. “You’re the one who needs the help right now, not me... I’ll help you shower first.”

Before he could protest again, I dragged him into the bathroom with me. I ignored him trying to fight me off when I took the clothes off his body. It reeked of rain and sweat, but I didn’t mind at all. Seeing Jun in such a sickly state worried me more than the awful smell that filled the bathroom. After I had put everything away for him, I turned around as he took his boxers off.

“Now can you go?” Jun asked me desperately. “I think I can do everything on my own from here.”

“Sorry, I can’t. I’ll just be outside of the door if you need me...” Oh god, I sound just like Jun. “N-never mind. Forget I said anything.” With that said, I bolted out of the bathroom right away. As soon as I closed the door behind me, I flopped on the bed and lightly slapped myself on my cheeks. I’ve only been under his care for two weeks and a half and it seems like that was enough for me to easily get influenced. Damn. I won’t let that happen.



Jun eventually felt a bit better after a hot shower and a change of clean clothes. I told him he shouldn’t be moving around trying to do things for me, but he refused to back out. He told me that I go first before him, another reason as to why he got sick. Though it seems that no matter how many times I told him to rest for the day, he wouldn’t listen to me. I eventually gave up on him and instead stayed with him in the kitchen just in case he collapses.

“When are you going back to work?” I asked him in attempt to break the silence in the room.

“Boss said I could take a month off, so I’m not due until the end of April. Why? Do you want to get rid of the that badly?”

I scoffed. “I was just wondering... I thought you were going to lose your job or something like that.”

“Don’t worry, I’m not. I haven’t been using up my vacation time anyways so boss said I deserved time some time off.”

“I see...”

It seems like our conversation wasn’t going to get further than that. After I last spoke, silence filled up the room again. It was the kind of awkward silences I dislike, and I was going to scream or yell if someone doesn’t say something. However, my agitation was put to an end when Jun sat across the counter from me.

“Hey, Nino?”

“What?”

“I know I haven’t been around you that long until now, but... y-you’ve changed...”

I feel my eyebrow lift up in interest. “Change how? Good or bad?”

“Good, I guess...”

“That doesn’t say much, you know.”

“I know, but it’s just that--” Jun paused for a second before a huge smile had formed on his lips.

I shot him an angry glare, knowing that he had just teased me unreasonably. However, I saw that his eyes moved back and forth to my lips and my face. “W-what are you looking at?” I stammered as I nervously grabbed my cup and took a sip of the cold coffee. For some reason, I was nervous, but I didn’t know why. Just as I had set the mug back down, I felt something swipe across my lips.

“Why, you--”

“You had a crumb on your lip, Nino,” Jun laughed as he wiped his finger on a napkin. “It was distracting me.”

“Whatever,” I snarled before shoving a spoonful of food in my mouth. After I swallowed the whole thing down, I was just about to drink from the mug again when I noticed that Jun disappeared from his seat. I looked to my right, then below the counter to see if he was there. However, when I looked to my left, I almost jumped back. Besides me, Jun was leaning against the counter, looking at me with such unreadable eyes. The playful smile he had on his face earlier was gone like that, and I wasn’t sure of what was going on in his mind. Was he really that sick?

“Nino... you have another crumb on your lip.”

“You should have just told me that instead of coming over here. You’re just--”

It was my turn to wipe the crumb off my lips and it wasn’t Jun’s job to wipe it for me. But the surprising thing happened in a flash that I had no idea how it happened. Like who started it, or why he did it. I was aware at the moment that everything in my body lost feeling except for my lips. The only area where I could feel all sorts of different sensations shooting around randomly in my body. Without me even realizing it, I closed my eyes. I knew I wasn’t supposed to, it would just mean I’m betraying Sho again. Me being in Jun’s apartment in the first place was wrong to begin with. Even though I’ve only seen Sho again just yesterday...

In the spur of the moment, I allowed Jun to kiss me. Was it because I needed it? Or was it because I just needed to feel loved again?...

TBC