10/21/13 -- Resolution (Part 13/50)
[365 Days Challenge- 1 word a day (2013)]Title:Home Sweet Home: Resolution
Pairing/Character:AibaxNino, JunxNino, Kaze, ShoxOC / Ohno
Genre/Rating:Angst, Fluff, Friendship, Romance / G
Word Count:1,541
Disclaimer:I own nothing but the plot
Summary:I knew what he was up to, but I didn’t stop him.
Warning:Character death
During dinner, the eldest nun asked us about what we should decide for our future since New Year’s Day will be in two days. Aiba, of course, couldn’t resist the question and was the first to raise his hand – actually, he was the only kid that raised his hand while the others picked at their food or ignored the nun as if she was the wind. I was amazed at how easily Aiba enthusiastically spilled his future plans and dreams in front of many other eyes and ears. I could barely understand the point Aiba was trying to make in between the rapid and excited speech, but I already knew what he wanted to be: a gardener and a plant scientist who owns a garden that everyone will love.
As soon as he finished, he sat back down and gave me the “I-went-up-so-it’s-your-turn” look. I did tell him before that just because he always volunteers to go up, it doesn’t mean I have to.
“Anyone else?” The nun asked once more as she scanned the apathetic crowd. She, too, had a hopeful mindset like Aiba had.
I tried telling him to stop being so persistent, but he grabbed my arm and raised it up as high as he could. “Kazu wants to say something!”
“No, I-”
“Well, go ahead Ninomiya-kun.”
“I really don’t-”
“Woo, yay Kazu!” Aiba cheered loudly that his voice echoed throughout the mess hall. Sometimes, I hated Aiba’s enthusiasm.
I took a deep breath as I thought about what to say, but nothing came across my mind, not that there was anything in the first place. I played with my fingers as I tried gave in more effort to think of something, but I knew that if I gave a random answer, Aiba would bother me endlessly about something I might not want to do. “What’s the one thing you want to do the most?” Aiba would ask me if he had the chance right now. The first thought that came into mind was the pile of music sheets I kept hidden underneath my mattress that I have yet to show Aiba. I stopped writing music a few months ago and had completely forgotten it til now.
“A musician,” I answered and sighed in relief, realizing how easy it was to answer. Was this how Aiba felt too?
“What instrument do you play, Ninomiya-kun?”
“…Guitar and vocal.”
“Well, that’s something you don’t hear every year,” the nun smiled softly at me as hope danced in her eyes. Seeing her smile at me in such a way reminded me of my mom and I couldn’t help but look away when I felt stinging in my eyes. I wish it was my mom up there instead.
“Kazu, I never knew you- Kazu, are you OK?” Aiba asked right away in that worried voice of his as soon as I sat back down. I didn’t want to make it obvious that I was feeling down, especially around Aiba because he always seems as if he would like to cry with me, and I would hate to see him cry just because of me.
“Yeah,” I mumbled weakly, which didn’t help at all because Aiba was trying to console me as soon as he heard my voice. “Aiba, I’m-”
It wasn’t words that Aiba used to soothe me, but when I felt his warm hand grab mines underneath the table, I gasped. I suddenly felt warm all over like it was a hot summer day, and my fingers intertwined with Aiba’s by themselves. My troubled thoughts quickly disappeared in an instant.
As soon as he finished, he sat back down and gave me the “I-went-up-so-it’s-your-turn” look. I did tell him before that just because he always volunteers to go up, it doesn’t mean I have to.
“Anyone else?” The nun asked once more as she scanned the apathetic crowd. She, too, had a hopeful mindset like Aiba had.
I tried telling him to stop being so persistent, but he grabbed my arm and raised it up as high as he could. “Kazu wants to say something!”
“No, I-”
“Well, go ahead Ninomiya-kun.”
“I really don’t-”
“Woo, yay Kazu!” Aiba cheered loudly that his voice echoed throughout the mess hall. Sometimes, I hated Aiba’s enthusiasm.
I took a deep breath as I thought about what to say, but nothing came across my mind, not that there was anything in the first place. I played with my fingers as I tried gave in more effort to think of something, but I knew that if I gave a random answer, Aiba would bother me endlessly about something I might not want to do. “What’s the one thing you want to do the most?” Aiba would ask me if he had the chance right now. The first thought that came into mind was the pile of music sheets I kept hidden underneath my mattress that I have yet to show Aiba. I stopped writing music a few months ago and had completely forgotten it til now.
“A musician,” I answered and sighed in relief, realizing how easy it was to answer. Was this how Aiba felt too?
“What instrument do you play, Ninomiya-kun?”
“…Guitar and vocal.”
“Well, that’s something you don’t hear every year,” the nun smiled softly at me as hope danced in her eyes. Seeing her smile at me in such a way reminded me of my mom and I couldn’t help but look away when I felt stinging in my eyes. I wish it was my mom up there instead.
“Kazu, I never knew you- Kazu, are you OK?” Aiba asked right away in that worried voice of his as soon as I sat back down. I didn’t want to make it obvious that I was feeling down, especially around Aiba because he always seems as if he would like to cry with me, and I would hate to see him cry just because of me.
“Yeah,” I mumbled weakly, which didn’t help at all because Aiba was trying to console me as soon as he heard my voice. “Aiba, I’m-”
It wasn’t words that Aiba used to soothe me, but when I felt his warm hand grab mines underneath the table, I gasped. I suddenly felt warm all over like it was a hot summer day, and my fingers intertwined with Aiba’s by themselves. My troubled thoughts quickly disappeared in an instant.
///▴\\\
“Wow!” Aiba exclaimed as I handed him my piles of forgotten music sheet. I quickly explained that I used to write music and lyrics because I took music class, before I lost my parents, as an interest, but I stopped when I came to a conclusion that it was useless.
“Kazu, these are all so good,” Aiba praised once he finished looking over them.
“Do you even know how to read music?”
“Of course I do,” Aiba mocked a hurt gasp, “my dad taught me.”
“Your- oh…” If only I had known…Then again, Aiba only talked about his family here and there and he never sounded too happy when he talked about them. From what he told me, his mom disliked him because his father had an affair with a woman, Aiba’s real mom, she hated because of a complicated past. His dad, on the other hand, loved him because he would say that he reminded him of his late mom... that is until he left without a word and Aiba had to suffer cruel words and alienation from his mother. But when his little brother, Yuusuke was born, Aiba had hope. I still don’t know why he’s here, though.
“I can play the guitar, too, but I’m not so good at singing. You can do that Kazu while I strum the guitar.”
I rolled my eyes. Here we go…
“I can do both myself.”
“Aw… but it would be really fun. I mean think about it. All the songs you and I-”
“I thought you-”
“Sing this song,” he interrupted me as he stretched and grabbed a slightly wrinkled paper. I was able to take a peak of the title and it turned out to be the first song I’ve written: “Caramel Song.” I wrote the song weeks before my parents anniversary, but I didn’t have the guts to sing and I eventually forgot about it. I didn’t feel like singing it now either so I pushed it aside when he passed it onto me.
“I like this song the most,” Aiba mumbled and moved from his bed to mines. “Can you sing it please?”
I shook my head.
“Please?” Aiba begged.
“Please?” He pouted and poked me on the shoulder. “I really wanna hear it.”
“You can sing it can’t you? You can read music anyways.”
“But I don’t know how to deliver it,” Aiba countered. “Besides, I think it suits Nino’s voice better.”
“I-“ I glanced to my side and I saw his bid doe eyes staring at me so desperately. Honestly, it was hard to resist Aiba’s big brown eyes and it was hard not to say, “no.” Sighing, I took the paper from his hand and cleared my throat. I could tell he was excited as he laid on his stomach, planted his elbows on the bed, and placed his chin on his hands.
“The square window cuts out a section of the evening sky that's dyed ruby red
Today grows darker as it's ending Tomorrow is the day you're setting out on your trip
Kindness always brings along loneliness with it
Let me close my eyes to the countless memories for now
You've always been my treasure I love you so much it's ridiculous
If someday, you'll be able to laugh, I'll wave my hand with all my heart and soul
On a veranda, I saw the lights of the street's stores and houses become brighter
The vapor trails are flowing by Is it because of my sigh? ”
From the corner of my eyes, I noticed that Aiba was staring at me intensely like I was the main character of a play. But then he sat up and moved closer and closer until there was barely space in between us. I felt my voice rise higher, and my body tremble as Aiba’s arm fidgeted awkwardly in between us. I knew what he was up to, but I didn’t stop him.
“If "good bye" comes out of my mouth, you'll probably be troubled, won't you?
I wonder if just by touching your hand next to me, it would be conveyed”
His hand brushed slightly against mine and I could feel the heat coming off from his skin. It was when I sang the next lines, he slipped his hand into mines and our fingers automatically came together.
”Between our tightly gripped hands, the dream you believed starts to come alive
I'll never forget you The sweet evening sky is melting
Stretch out that hand Twilight isn't here yet
Grab the stars Before it draws nearer
The truth is, I really want to hold on to you...
You've always been my treasure I love you so much it's ridiculous
If someday, you'll be able to laugh, I'll wave my hand with all my heart and soul
Between our tightly gripped hands, the dream you believed starts to come alive
I'll never forget you The sweet evening sky is melting”*
I let the paper fall from my hand onto the pile of papers as I slowly moved aside to give Aiba space. He had fallen asleep a few lines before the ending, but I refused to move him from my bed. Besides, there was enough space for the both of us, and enough warmth and blankets for the both of us to share. I made sure not to wake him up as I slipped into the blankets. Our warm bodies combined with the blankets made it much better to sleep with him rather than sleeping by myself. Once my eyes were closed, I tightened my grip on Aiba’s hand.
*Lyrics credit:
yarukizeroTBC
Comments