Wouldn't Change A Thing
Forbidden Dreamers Review Gallery»Wouldn't Change A ThingReview«
Title (2/5)
The title in my opinion doesn't really make sense within the story, but I can see where you're coming from.
Foreward/Description (6/10)
I know that the forward/despcription is only supposed to tell some parts of what will happen, but it was a little to vague in my point of view.
Appearance (4/5)
Everything was laid out nicely. The only thing I would change is to make the font a little bigger so it'll be easier to read.
Plot (10/15)
The plot was great, but there were times in where I was slightly confused on what was going on.
I honestly thought it was a little rushed, I would've loved it if you could've let the story progress a little more.
Originality (13/15)
I have come across stories like this before, but it was my first time reading a version of it. So good job!
Language (17/20)
Knowing that english isn't your first language, you actually did an excellent job. The things you need to practice on is your grammer and your spelling mistakes.
For example, you had some words in where you tried to put in a past tense form, but ended up putting in present tense.
Another example is when you wrote, "You should met him once appa!" the correct form of this sentence could be, "You should meet him appa!"
Flow (7/10)
As I said before, I felt things were a little rushed and I got confused at some parts of the story.
Characterization (8/10)
The descriptions of the characters were great. There are little things that I would change, but it's nothing major.
Overall Enjoyment (8/10)
It's really cute and fun to read, I'm looking forward to the other projects you come up with.
Reviewed by: -haruharu
80/100!
Comments