EXO-B.A.P.: Ghost-Busters Edition Review
Forbidden Dreamers Review GalleryTitle (3/5) → The title is simple and original, sort of plain.
Foreword/ Description (9/10) → I love the way in the description, you described the characters and they were going to save Tao's bank account. *laughs* The foreword was pretty good, not to revealing.
Appearance (4/5) → The poster is beautiful. The background didn't match with your poster too well.
plot (12/15) → The plot was pretty interesting. It held my attention with the little mistakes each character would make.
Originality (13/15)→ I was laughing while reading it. Quite Original I would say.
Grammar & Spelling (18/20)→ In chapter one, "Tao flapped his arms at the expanse of the mansion. " expanse isn't a word, the correct word is expense. Also in chapter one, "Also, eating beansprouts will hasten life.” Bean sprouts are two separate words. “What.” Tao grumped, unwillingly closing his book. Grumped isn't the word, the right word is grumbled.
In chapter two, Just then, a single pair of eyes appeared, glowering brightly. Glowering isn't a word, the word you are looking for is glowing. There was a teddy-bear, a chain of sparkly hearts, a tiny Pororo flashlight, a nail-clipper, and other unidentifiable objects strung along that lone key. I think you mean line not lone. They heat life up with warmth, and meditation under a tall tree brings great enlightenment. The heat part is wrong, I think it's the sentence structure. That would certainly heat life up. “Members of B.A.P. and EXO were found squished dead, their guts and innards splattered upon haunted mansion’s walls.” Squished isnt the word, it is actually squashed.
I only edit part of your story but you can now fix some small mistakes.
Flow (9/10)→ The flow of the story went really well.
Characterization (9/10)→ The characters really appeal to me in their own way because they have different personalities. :)
Overall Enjoyment (10/10)→ I would recommend this to readers that likes to laugh ^^
87/100!
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