Jaehwan ah.. we have decided to have a BBQ party tomorrow night. You must come, okay? Love you~~~~

From Hakyeon Hyung

Jaehwan sighs deeply and throw his phone across the couch. He knows he has to reply his friend’s message but he doesn’t feel like doing it. Food.. what’s the purpose of going when I don’t even deserve to eat.. Jaehwan thinks and closes his eyes, unpleasant memories starts to appear on his mind.

----Flashback----

“Look at him.. so pathetic..”             

“Although six of them are always together but don’t you think they look better without him?”

“Yea. Look at him, Taekwoon oppa and the others have such attractive and build body but he looks ugly.”

“I know right.. Maybe he is a or manwhore that’s why they are keeping him”

“Most probably.. why else they would want him? He looks fat and chubby.. nothing near fit..”

Ever since Jaehwan joined that group of friends (Hakyeon, Taekwoon, Wonshik, Hongbin and Sanghyuk) who have been assumed as the prince charming in the campus, he have been receiving hates and rude comments. He knows that some of the rumors are just fake but he dare not to do anything. He knew that he is chubby and not the athletic type. He never think that it will be a problem up until now.

Sometimes he felt like he wanted to talk to the group of friends and seek comfort from them. Yet, he is afraid that the rumors are true. He always knows that he is not the best, or maybe just the best among the worst. So, he decided to diet and lose weight. He have read many articles that one can change their appearance just by losing weight.

He tried to go to the gym, tried to attend some classes but the outcomes weren’t as good as he expected. Thus, he chose one of the most harmful methods. He started off with two meals a day to one meal a day and end up only survive with minimal amount of food. For the past two months, he has been surviving with water and some stomach-filling soybean, trying his best to avoid from eating any food that has the possibility to cause him weight.

----Flashback end----

“I want to go.. but I can’t eat.. What should I do?” he asks helplessly at the living room in his apartment. He sighs and picks up his phone again, typing a reply.

Alright. I will be there.

The next day comes too fast for Jaehwan’s liking. He wakes up with slight discomfort due to the hunger. He walks to the toilet and looks at himself at the mirror. He smiles bitterly “It’s what I have chosen. I can deal with it”. He then goes to work with an empty stomach and survive through the day with plain water.

After work, he feels like going home due to the dizziness but he decides to ignore it since he has promised that he will be attending the BBQ party. He nervously stands in front of the house and prepares himself mentally. He then enters the house with a force smile and greets the others.

As the party goes on, the guys are enjoying themselves with the meat and food. Jaehwan is trying to distract the others from knowing him not eating by keeps on focusing on grilling the meat or prepares the food for them. “Jaehwan hyung~ you not eating? The meat taste awesome!” Sanghyuk asks while stuffing more meat in his mouth. “Ah.. I will eat after grilling this portion of meat” Jaehwan answer nervously and avoid the eye contact of the others.

Jaehwan immediately excuses himself to the toilet after grilling that meat. He sighs and leans against the wall. He wants to cry, he wants to scream, he wants to release his upset emotion. Suddenly, he feels that someone is pulling him into an embrace.

“Why are you destroying yourself, Jaehwan ah? You are no longer the cheerful chubby Jaehwan that I once knew. You look so empty now. I wish I can make you feel alive again” the someone says and Jaehwan looks from with a tearful eyes. “Taekwoon hyung?” Jaehwan says confusedly.

“Your cheeks used to be so cute and chubby. They make me feel like pinching or kissing them all day” Taekwoon says and caresses the cheeks. “Your eyes used to look so lively that they capture my attention everytime when I see you” he then stares lovingly into the younger’s eyes. “Your lips used to look soft and pink that I just want to kiss you all day. but now they are always pale” he then touch the younger’s pale lips with his thumb.

“Let me take care of you, okay?” Taekwoon says, hopefully the younger will agree to him.

“Hyung.. you don’t need to” Jaehwan replies softly, eyes looking down at his own feet.

“I want to, okay? Do it for me. Or at least do it for yourself” Taekwoon says with an ancouraging tone.

“But I don’t know how…” Jaehwan says.

“Leave it to me. I will help you. For now, lets treat your empty stomach” Taekwoon says and leads the younger to the yard again. For the first time after his decision for diet, Jaehwan finds himself smiling sincerely, not the usual forced smile.

Update! Enjoy reading! :D