"Oppa.." I stood in the entrance of the playroom. Yongguk was sitting leisurely on the couch, watching tv.

"What's up, babe?" he smiled warmly and turned the tv off.

"Fine.."

"Come sit." he patted the empty seat next to him. I sat on the other side of the couch, keeping a distance between us. He wanted to talk, and I had a feeling I won't like this conversation, especially if it's related to Matt.

"Why are you so far away from me?" Yongguk looked at the empty space between us.

"Sorry.." I mumbled and got closer to him, still keeping a distance. "You wanted to talk?"

"Yes. I want to ask you something, but I want your sincere answer."

"Okay.." I said confused. Why is he so serious?

"Do you trust me?" Yongguk asked.

"Of course I do."

"Then why didn't you tell me about Matt?"

"Because there was nothing to tell."

"Really?" he questioned, staring intently at me.

"Really. It wasn't a big deal anyway."

"How is him insulting you not a big deal?"

"I'm fine with it." I shrugged.

"Well, I'm not." he stated.

"It's not your problem, so stay out of it. I'm already mad at you because you argued with him earlier."

"Are you seriously taking his side?" he glared at me.

"Of course not! But it's my problem, not yours."

"Your problem is my problem, and vice versa. We are in a relationship, if you haven't noticed." he sounded bitter.. Or mad. I can't figure out which one of the two is it.

"That doesn't give you the right to control my life. I can take care of my own problems." I retorted.

"Hyeri.." Yongguk said softly.

"I told you already I'm fine with it, so please don't get involved. I don't want you to get hurt."

"Are you really okay with it?" Yongguk questioned.

"Yes."

"Stop lying."

"I'm not lying!" I unintentionally raised my voice.

"You didn't look fine in the cafeteria."

"Oppa, please drop the subject. I told you already that it's fine, so stop digging further."

"No. There is something else, isn't it?"

"No." I insisted. Why is he so doubtful?

"I know you well enough by now to know that there is something bugging you that you are not telling me about."

"Fine." I sighed heavily. "I don't have a problem with him since I think he is right and I do need to lose weight. It's not only him, Jinu agrees as well."

"Come with me." Yongguk stood up, offering me his hand. Huh? I expected a different reaction from him..

"Where?" I asked.

"Just come with me. It won't take long, I promise."

"Fine." I sighed and took his hand, letting him lead me. I followed him quietly to one of the practice rooms.

"Why are we here?" I asked confused, looking around the empty room. Nothing seemed weird or unusual, so I still don't understand why wer'e here.

"Come here." he led me to the mirror and stood behind me, not touching me.

"What?" I looked at him through the mirror.

"I just want you to see what I see." he stared at me.

"I don't get it."

"What do you see when you look in the mirror right now?"

"A couple that doesn't match together." I said the first thing that came to my mind.

"Why?" he asked without showing any emotion.

"Because the guy can do much better." I tore my gaze away from the mirror in front of us.

"Look back up." Yongguk ordered.

"I don't want to."

"Why do you think I can do better?"

"Just because."

"Hyeri.." he said sternly. He didn't call me 'babe' like he usually does.. Is he mad at me? I looked back up, watching him.

"Well?" Yongguk goaded me when I didn't say anything.

"You are tall, I am short. You are handsome, I have an average look. You are skinny, I'm not." I mumbled fast, hoping he won't hear it. He sighed.

"Where do you see fats?" he asked.

"My face." I pinched my cheeks to emphasize it. Yongguk slowly lifted his right hand, tracing my face with his fingers. His touch sent shivers through my body. I watched him from the mirror.

"Those are not considered fats. And you are cute like that." he pinched my cheeks as well.

"It's obvious you'll say that."

"Where else?"

"My stomach." I lifted my shirt a little, exposing my stomach. His eyes trailed down to my newly exposed skin.

"It's flat. I can see your bones. If you lose more weight you are going to disappear." he stated. I looked at my stomach again. I only managed to see the fats I need to burn. 

"You don't understand." I pulled my tshirt back down and turned around to face him.

"Then explain it to me." he said dryly. "Why can't you see I like you the way you are?" a tear made it's way down on my cheek. He gently wiped it with his thumb. "I don't care about looks. I like you because you are you, with or without a couple more kilograms." Somehow it only made me cry harder. I guess it was all the stress and exhaustion from everything.

"Babe.." he hugged me, letting me cry on him. "Please don't do this to yourself.. I don't know why you always look down on yourself, but it hurts me seeing you like this."

"I'm just scared you are going to leave.." I admitted weakly. I have no idea how he heard it since it was just a bit louder than a whisper.

"Why?" he my hair gently.

"Because everyone leaves me." I cried harder.

"I'm not everyone." he hugged me tighter.

"It didn't work with my parents, why would it work with you?" I asked bitterly, new tears forming in my eyes. "They were supposed to love me regardless of everything, so why did they give up on me?"

Yongguk's heart broke. In the end, everything is related to that damn parents of her's.. How can a person throw away their kid like that? She was an adult at that time, but a child is still a child, even when he is sixty.

"Babe." he made me look at him, wiping my tears. "I'm not them. What do you want me to do to make you believe me?" 

"Nothing." I pulled away from his embrace, wiping the remaining tears from my face.

"Look at me." Yongguk ordered. I lifted my eyes to look at him, and he turned me around so now I was facing the mirror again. He wrapped his arms around my waist.

"Do you want to know what I see when I look at you?" he leaned his head on my shoulder, both of us looking at each other through the mirror. I nodded.

"I see a beautiful girl, from the inside and from the outside, that just doesn't know how pretty she is. All the things you think you are lacking are actually things I like about you. I like your imperfection, and I like the fact that we complete each other." tears started to cover my face again. "I don't know where do you see fats, but you have no idea how you drive me crazy. Your waist fits perfectly in my arms, and you are the prettiest when you just wake up and when you have no makeup on. And I wish I could be half as strong as you mentally."

"I'm not strong, it's an act." I stated. "I just look like that on the outside, but on the inside I'm just broken and scared to death."

"That is where you are wrong." he wiped my tears, still hugging me with his other arm. "She exists on the inside as well. How else would you rip my head off if I mess up or talk back to people if you don't like what they did?" Yongguk tried to joke.

"That doesn't mean I'm strong."

"You are here because you are strong. If you weren't strong you would have probably still be on the streets. The fact that you managed to stay yourself after everything youv'e been through means that your parents taught you well and that you are strong and have a strong will power." I stayed quiet, thinking about what he said. He has a point.. I could have easily end up differently. I could have sold my body in order to make a living or fall into drugs and alcohol, but I didn't.

"You are strong. You just need to give yourself more credit." Yongguk's voice cut me off from my thoughts. "And learn to let go a little. You are too stressed and you are carrying everything on your back. You are not responsible for all the problems in the world."

"I'm sorry." he turned me around so I'll face him.

"If you are sorry then promise me to stop thinking you are not good enough for me. I make my own decisions and I want to be with you."

"Oppa.." I protested.

"Promise me." he insisted.

"Fine." I sighed, realizing I don't have a choice. "I promise."

"Good." he finally smiled. I stood there quietly, examining him and learning to appreciate him even more. 'Amazing' doesn't start to describe how he really is.

"Babe.." Yongguk said after a few moments of silence.

"What?"

"Were you starving yourself because of that idiot?"

"No."

"Lie." he stated. . I need to figure out how he knows when I'm lying..

"I didn't really starve myself, I just minimized my food.. And you know I tend to skip meals a lot anyway.." I tried to explain.

"What did you eat in the last couple of days?"

"Water."

"That's not food." he poked my forehead.

"Lettuce."

"And?"

"And that's it? I don't remember." I shrugged.

"Let's go eat something." he grabbed my hand, lacing our fingers together.

"It's the middle of the night, where will you get food?" I asked.

"Come with me." he led me to his studio. He took two ramyun cups out of a drawer and showed them to me.

"I know I promised I'll make you ramyun one day and I will, but for now accept this?"

"Yes." I smiled. "But my diet.." I pouted.

"We will burn it together in the weekend." Yongguk smiled.

"Yah! I told you already I'm not doing it, why can't you understand?" I threw a pillow I found nearby at him, annoyed. Why is this subject up again?

"I was talking about running, you are the one with the dirty mind. I'm not trying to force you to do anything. I will wait, and I can take care of myself in the meantime.."

"I don't need to know that!" I exclaimed when I realized what he meant. Great, now I'll think about it.. So annoying.

"But you were thinking about that, weren't you?" he smirked.

"Idiot." I ignored his question. Even if I did, he doesn't need to know that.

"Alright, alright. Come, let's eat." he put his arm on my shoulder. 

I know it was only a simple ramyun, but it was the most delicious meal I ever had.

~

"What took you so long?" Sey asked when Himchan finally came back from his schedule.

"Schedules." he said dryly and sat on the couch.

"I hate waiting, and you know I need to wake up early tomorrow."

"When did you become so spoiled?" he pondered, annoyed.

"I'm sorry for not being the perfect girlfriend that agrees with everything you do." she said sarcastically.

"Why are you mad anyway? I should be the one getting mad since you were the one that cheated on me!" Himchan stood up, raising his voice.

"I didn't cheat on you!" she raised her voice as well.

"Then how do you call it?" he put his arm on his waist.

"Looking around." she said innocently.

"How would you feel if I looked around as well?"

"I would kill you." she stated.

"Your'e amazing.." Himchan snorted. "Do you even know why I'm mad?" he questioned.

"I didn't do anything with him!" Sey exclaimed. Why can't he get that?

"Your double standarts are amazing.." he sighed heavily.

"Oppa.." she called softly.

"Just forget it." he said and left the room, leaving her behind.

~

"Oh, right! I forgot!" I exclaimed while me and Yongguk were cuddling on the couch in the playroom after we finished eating.

"What is it?" he asked curiously.

"I wanted to see the videos the company uploaded, but I forgot."

"Let's watch it together." he smiled, and I took out my phone.

The song they chose is "Alive" (Sia). I remember that.. Hyerim chose the song to challenge me and I struggled with it a lot since my voice always cracked. When I had to sing it at the evaluations it was the first time my voice didn't crack while singing it. The dance video they chose was a hip hop routine I did in one of the first evaluations. It looked good.

"Where do I sign up?" Yongguk asked when we finished watching, tightening his grip around my waist.

"For what?" I asked confused.

"To be your biggest fan." he smiled brightly. I blushed.

"Sorry, that spot is already taken." I decided to a little.

"By who?" he pouted.

"Not telling."

"Tell me." he pecked my cheek.

"No."

"Tell me." he moved to kiss my neck.

"I might let you take that place if you sign up properly."

"How?" he gave me a curious look.

"Like this." I kissed his lips. He parted his lips and my tongue entered his mouth, exploring it thoroughly. His tongue joined mine shortly after, fighting for dominance.

"I don't think I understood.." Yongguk said after we parted. "Explain it again, slowly."

"And I'm the ert one.." I said sarcastically.

"Well, I'm only a ert when it's related to you." he smiled innocently.

"I don't know if I should be honored or disturbed.."

"Honored, of course."

"I have an idiot boyfriend." I mumbled to myself.

"I heard that!" he commented.

"Good." I smiled.

"Apologize."

"No."

"Then prepare to suffer!" he warned and started tickling me. I tried to avoid it, but it was useless. My back was glued to the couch and he was hovering over me, his fingers tickling my stomach and the sides of my body.

"Oppa, stop!" I asked while laughing because it was ticklish.

"When you apologize."

"Never." I tried to be tough, and he tickled me even more.

"Fine, I give up. I'll give you whatever you want, just sop tickling me!" I surrendered after a couple of minutes, when it was unbearable.

"Everything?" he questioned, smirking. From his tone I understood what he meant..

"Almost everything." I hurried to correct myself. "I told you already that we are not doing that thing." I sat back up.

"You can't blame a man for trying.." he sat next to me on the couch, his hand resting on my left thigh.

"I don't." I smiled, and kissed his right cheek. he smiled as well and pecked my lips. leading to a passionate kiss,

~

"Oppa.." Sey chased after Himchan.

"I don't want to talk right now." he said dryly, walking faster.

"I'm sorry." she hugged his back. He finally stopped walking and took a deep breath.

"For what?"

"For hurting you."

"That's it?"

"And for getting distracted by him. I was just annoyed because you were busy and I missed being with you, so when I got some attention from him I was flattered. But the one I really want to compliment me is you, not him." she tigethened her grip around him.

"Honey.." Himchan sighed and turned around, looking at her.

"You called me 'honey' again." she beamed.

"Why didn't you tell me how you feel?"

"I don't know, you were just busy and I didn't see you often, so when we were finally together I preferred doing other things with you.."

"I can't guess what's wrong if you are not talking to me." he said dryly.

"I know, I'm sorry." she looked down, moving her feet nervously. "I promise to tell you what bothers me in the future, and I won't look at other guys even if they compliment me."

"Stay away from that guy."

"I can't ignore him, he is training us."

"Then make sure you spend less time with him and don't flirt with him." he glared at her.

"I promise."

"Come here." he opened his arms for a hug. She hugged him tightly and he wrapped his arms around her.

"I promise to make it up to you."

"How?"

"However you want." she smirked.

"I think I have some ideas.." 

~

I talked with Yongguk for hours. We talked about my childhood, funny stories from his idol life, the company and our members and about random stuff that came to our mind. Time flew by fast.

"Let's go see the sunrise." Yongguk offered, smiling.

"Let's go." we went up to the roof and waited for the sun to rise. Yongguk hugged me tightly,and I had a wide smile on my face.

"You know, I always wanted to do this with my boyfriend." I said while watching it together.

"I'm happy I'm the one that made it come true for you."

"I'm happy as well."

"What else do you want to do with your boyfriend?" he leaned his head on my shoulder.

"A lot of things. But you already fulfilled some of them."

"Babe.."

"What?"

"Promise me that you'll tell me what bothers you. Always. Don't keep things bottled up, it's not healthy."

"I promise."

"Then I promise to do the same."

Author's Note:

Don't kill me, I know I promised BAP, but the part with Hyeri and Yongguk got really long, so I'm moving it to the next chapter.

I needed this chapter to close some things and for the future plot as well :P

And I hope it also helped you understand Hyeri a little better. I know she is a little annoying with her insecurity and stuff, but she had a reason for it.

Thanks for still sticking with me, I promise to do better!

M.