themedicalscholar: You're going to hate me for this chapter. But it's okay, since we still have a long way to go. 

She cried her eyes out, and Lee Dong Wook kept her tightly in his embrace. He cleared his throat, but he could feel his tears choking in his throat. Like a ball of fist that could not go away.

'Ji Hyo-ya.' He utters. 'Why couldn't we just start again?' 

She was listening, but she wasn't saying anything.

'It's like, what if we tried again? You could forget him, and we could stay in together. We're the same age so we can talk comfortably with each other. We'd order take out, sometimes I'll cook. And sometimes you'll cook. I couldn't take all of your pain away, but I could try doing so. We're always searching for other people, Ji Hyo-ya. But even if you feel something for him, it doesn't change the fact that you're doubting. So let's just date openly. We'll see each other often, talk to each other like we used to, and maybe move in with each other? We've done it before, and we've had fun doing it. So why not, Ji Hyo-ah, aren't you in pain?' He says, uttering slowly as if he was talking to a cat and trying hard not to scare her. 

Ji Hyo thought about it. What are the possibilities of being in a relationship with Kwang Soo anyways? When you get older, you start to want things from a relationship. You can like someone, and you can probably love someone too - but he's young, and he would probably get over the feelings he had for her too if you think about statistics and likeliness. Song Ji Hyo thought, why is she crying so hard for someone that she doesn't even know what she wanted from them? It was hard, trying to calculate your worth for someone. 

And this time, she pulled away from Dong Wook. She looked at him clearly. Friends for years, and he knows whatever she needs every time. So why not just jump into his arms, and let him float her away? 

Finally she nods. 

'Yes?' Dong Wook asks. 

She nods again. 'Yeah.'

'Yes?' He reassures. 'Are you sure?' 

She nods. 'Yeah, I'm sure.' 

When he kissed her, she felt like she wasn't thinking right. But she couldn't change her mind, not now. She couldn't change her mind now. 

He stayed the night, took care of the barbecue. They sat up, talked to each other. She told her about the whole thing, right from the start. It was hard to tell him, since she knows, even know, she's not going to only look at him. 

She sent a text, a final text to Lee Kwang Soo.

It has been sudden, and I am sorry to have hurt you. But I can't do this anymore, and so can't you. 

I love you, Kwang Soo-ya, but my heart shouldn't have been with you in the first place. 

I'm not coming to see you. 

I'm sorry. 

I really am. 

She sent it, when Dong Wook was sleeping next to her. She was supposed to meet him, but right now, she's not going to. In the darkness, she could only think about Lee Kwang Soo, even if she has someone silently sleeping next to her, his soft breathing was calming, and he had her arms around her while he slept. She looked at him while he was sleeping, a small crease just on the bridge of his eyebrows seemed to stay. She ran her fingers through his hair. 

In the end, it was never supposed to work. But she needed them to work, because she knows, Lee Dong Wook loves her more than he could ever admit. Kwang Soo, of course, he was honest with his feelings. But she decided it was too hard. That loving him, was too hard. 

That night it rained. Song Ji Hyo found herself lightly weeping. But still, she couldn't do anything to change it, drifting slowly into sleep.