It's Over But I Still Love You

A Fangirl's Dream

*Nicole’s POV*

“Minho, I’m scared,” I laughed nervously while stretching one arm searchingly out before me.

“Don’t worry; I’ve got you,” he reassured me, leading me by the hand.

I was wearing a blindfold, but I could tell we were going up an incline. Minho wanted to surprise me with the destination of our last date, which I acted annoyed about but actually thought was the sweetest thing ever.

“Almost there,” he stated as the ground began to level out beneath my feet.

By the sound of birds tweeting and leaves rustling I knew we were in the woods, but I had no idea why. There was nothing to do in the woods!

“Okay, were here.” I could sense him making his way around me and untying the blindfold.

When the piece of fabric fell of my eyes, it revealed the most beautiful sight I’d ever seen. A few meters in front of us was a clear little stream that trickled over rocks and fallen branches. Looking upstream I could see a waterfall cascading down a rock surface. Because of the way the sunlight shone through it, a brightly colored rainbow was formed against the glistening droplets. The branches on the trees overhead swayed in the wind, causing the turning leaves to fall onto the forest floor.

“It’s beautiful,” I whispered, afraid of breaking the beautiful moment with my voice.

“Come on,” Minho said, taking me by the hand and leading me toward the little creek.

When we got to the edge of the water Minho sat down on a rock and began taking his shoes off.

“What are you doing?” I asked in confusion.

“I think I’ll cool off a bit,” he looked up at me with a smirk, continuing to untie his other shoe.

“But it’s not even hot out! If anything I think this is the coldest day so far!”

“Well,” he sighed, standing up in his bare feet, “I guess I’ll go in alone then.”

“Wait.” I grabbed his hand and he turned to look at me, a giant smirk on his face. “I guess I’ll come in too.”

“I was hoping you’d say that!”

I sat down on the rock and slipped off my sandals. No sooner did I have them off when Minho scooped me up in his arms.

“Ahh! Minho! I swear if you drop me-,”

“Have a little faith,” he laughed, as he made his way into the water. “Aigoo it’s cold!!!”

“See, what did I tell you?” I rolled my eyes at him. “Minho!” I shrieked when he pretended to drop me in protest. “Not funny.”

“Don’t worry yebo, I’ve got you.”

Minho made his way up the stream toward the waterfall. The water only came up to about his mid-thigh at the highest, but then again that was Minho; the giant beast. I was the shrinky-dink midget who was barely tall enough to reach the gas pedal of my VW Bug back home.

He set me down on a rock right next to the water fall. The spray coming off from it along with the breeze it created was enough to give me shivers.

“Why did you bring me here on such a cold day? It feels like fall,” I complained, wrapping myself in a self-hug for warmth. I hated the end of August because it meant less tanning and more cold. Cold weather was my enemy.

“I brought you here,” Minho said, stepping onto the small rock with me. It was so small that he had to wrap his arms around me and pull me close. “Because I wanted our last date to be beautiful; just like you.”

“Minho, don’t say that, please,” I looked down at the swirling water below us.

“But you are beautiful,” he said, lifting my head up by placing a hand gently under my chin.

“Oh, well you can say that all day,” I smiled at him. “But I mean about the… last date.” I mumbled the words as if that somehow would make them nonexistent.

“Hey, don’t be sad. We’ll see each other again.”

“But it won’t be the same and you know that. The distance is going to make us all grow apart. The others are just too blind to see it.”

“Nicole-,”

“No Minho!” I stopped him in hopes that it would stop the tears creeping toward the edges of my eyes. “We’re going to have to break up, so we need to start now. We can’t be a couple with both of us on opposite ends of the earth! When we say goodbye… that’ll be it.”

I could sense Minho staring at me with sad eyes, but I didn’t dare look up into them.

“Now, this is the part where I’d walk away meaningfully, but the water is very cold and we are on a rock. So if you don’t mind, would you carry me away meaningfully?”

“Of course,” he answered, though I still didn’t make eye contact. Just the sound of his voice told me that he was getting emotional.

You’ll always be in my heart Minho. Even if we aren’t together in the end, at least I can know that I found the one for once in my life.

------------------ 

We sat in silence. Minho drove the rental car down the winding forest road while I sat in the passenger seat, staring out the window at a bunch of bushes and trees.

Suddenly I felt the car begin the slow down. Minho pulled off to the side of the road, awakening me from my daydream.

“What are you doing?” I asked as he brought the vehicle to a complete stop.

“We’re out of gas,” he said, turning to look at me.

“What?! We’re in the middle of nowhere! What are we going to do?!”

“Well, I have some ideas,” Minho smirked deviously.

“Hey, don’t start! I thought we were beginning our breakup, remember? Minho? Min…”

I closed my eyes as he leaned over and kissed my lips. Gahhh, it made me spaz inside! I was going to miss that so much! He unclipped his seatbelt and while I undid mine, and he pulled me into his lap. Our kisses became deeper and more passionate. He reached for the bottom of my shirt, but I stopped him.

“Uh uh,” I shook my head.

“But Nicole-,”

“It’s better in the backseat,” I winked.

“You’re so bad.”

I just laughed and climbed into the backseat, pulling him with me. However, when my eyes caught sight of the gas gage my heart skipped a beat. I felt so loved by that clever little Minho. The gage didn’t read empty, but instead read half full.

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Woobear27
Just letting those of you who are wondering that YES there WILL be a sequal to this story^.^ I am in the process of writing it right now!

Comments

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EHhyung
#1
Really nice story and I really love it so much
sinebright1095 #2
I love it :)
writerinprogress94
#3
Chapter 6: Second review of the day! Let's do this! Chapters 3-6, woo! (And this is why I shouldn't have caffine...)
I don't think I caught any spelling or grammar errors in the last 4 chapters. There might have been a few places where the wrong punctuation sign was used, but other than that, 9.5/10 on grammar and spelling.
I feel like there wasn't as much description in the last four chapters, but there was definately more dialogue so it balanced out. 8.5/10 on word choice.
Your sentence structure was still a bit choppy in places, but your transitions were flawless. You moved very smoothly from one chapter or POV to another. 9/10 on sentence structure and transitions.
The characters are filling out very nicely! 9/10
Continuation value?
...
...
... 80/100 :D
Now on to the next chapter!
writerinprogress94
#4
Chapter 2: seem a bit choppy. Maybe if they were combined...? Your transitions between ideas, paragraphs, and POVs were all "Sipjeom Manjeome Sipjeom!(10 out of 10)" Yay for 2PM reference :D
Dear lord, I've had to split this into 2 comments XP Me and my rambling...
Point #4~ Charcters! Any writer who's tried to write several OC's at once can appreciate the difficulty of having to give them each their own unique persona without making them a Mary-Sue. Even though by chapter two I've only seen your OC's a bit, they're all distinguishable from each other. I also think you're doing great on SHINee's POV's, too!
Final point~ Continuation value? (I believe I made up this phrase, but feel free to use it as long as you credit me XD)
In many longer stories, if by around the 5th to 10th I'm not enjoying it or interested for whatever reason, I'll stop reading. Your story, by chapter 2, is already at a 70/100 (which can drop or go up. I can already tell, though, that it'll be at least a 90/100 by the end!)
That's all until my next review! If these long reviews bother you, tell me and I'll shorten them :3
writerinprogress94
#5
Chapter 2: Even though the story is already completed, I'm still going to comment every few chapters. As an author I know how helpful feedback is!
First off, I don't think I caught any grammar or spelling mistakes in the last 2 chapters except for in Minho's POV in Chapter 1. You typed "Ewe, in a public restroom?" for Key's dialogue. "Ewe", spelled E-W-E, is a female sheep. Suggestions for the future or if you want to change it~ "Gross", "Nasty", "Disgusting", or simply "Ew"(sorry if I come across as a know-it-all, I don't try to XD). The only questionable thing is in the first sentence of Onew's POV in Chapter 2 you put "Her drooling words". Obviously I'm not all-knowing (who is, right?) so just because I don't know what that means doesn't mean it's wrong. Do you mean she's actually drooling? Could you clarify? I might want to use that word/phrase in the future, but I'd want to use it correctly! :3
Okay, now to the second point! Your word choice, which I mean by everything like your descriptions/imagery (like how the mansion was described during Key's POV in Captper 1; I don't know about you but writing the detailed descriptions is always the most tedious part of writing the story for me, so I applaud you! :D) to using words other than "said" for dialogue (one of my biggest fanfic pet peeves is when I find a story that has an amazing foreward, then I go to the first chapter and the whole thing is in "'Blah blah blah' said ___" format. Therefore, I really appreciate how you used things like *checks story quickly* "smiled"/"laughed"/"carried on"/etc.) That's really all I have to say on this point.
Point #3~ Sentence structure and segways/transitions between sentences and POVs! Over all in these first two chapters I'd give the sentence structure an 8.5/10. Some of the sentences just seemed a bit choppy. Like in Carolyn's POV in chapter 2 she says/thinks "Most people would've called it gay. I found it utterly attractive." The way they are now at the end of the paragraph they just
writerinprogress94
#6
I can't wait to read this! I listened to the piano cover while I read the opening and I swear I could actually see the whole thing! I can't wait to finish this story and head over to the sequel!
KhKheiselle0901 #7
Chapter 135: Welcome XD :D i just love this story..
EvrydayIsaShiningDay #8
Chapter 135: okay can i just say i was really confused when i saw that this was updates. xD same goes for the sequal. xD
danlyy
#9
That closure is so sad for minho...I suspect its Brianna who's become a black and red girl:/
CookieDookie #10
Ooh sequel :D
Can't wait ~