Uneasy

AUTHOR:ANONYMOUS

“Hey, Fany, are you ready?” Taeyeon tried to tie her shoelaces with her phone under her ear. “I’m about to come pick you up.”

There was muffled laughter coming from Tiffany’s side. “Ah, about that, Taetae,” said Tiffany distractedly.

Before she said it, Taeyeon had already stopped putting her shoe on. She knew what Tiffany was going to say.

“Sorry, but everyone at the office decided to eat out together. It’s apparently the boss’ birthday,” Tiffany whispered that last bit. “So I’m really, really sorry, but I can’t make it for our dinner tonight. Ar-Yah, Yuri, stop that!”

Taeyeon sat back on her heels and closed her eyes as giggling came over the speakers.

“Taetae?” Tiffany finally calmed down.

“Hmm?”

A pause. “You sound sad.”

Well, considering how often this has happened, Fany-ah, what else can I be? “I’m good,” Taeyeon said, forcing herself to sound bubbly. “Enjoy yourself, okay? Don’t come home too late.”

“Okay!” Taeyeon could hear the smile through Tiffany’s voice, and the corners of turned up unconsciously. “What are you going to do, then?”

Taeyeon stood up tiredly and checked her watch. “I’ll go grab dinner with Sooyoung and Sunny. Is there someone who can take you home?”

“Yep. Yuri’s going to drive me home, she said. Right?” Taeyeon swallowed as more laughter filtered through the phone. “Yep, it’s all set. You have fun, okay? Tell Soo and Sunny I said hi! And don’t stay out too late, okay? Love you, Taetae!”

“Love you too,” said Taeyeon weakly. Ending the call, she took a deep breath.

--

“Aw yeah! Thanks for the treat, Taengoo!” Sooyoung happily patted her completely flat stomach as they walked down the street.

Taeyeon smiled.

“Is something wrong?”

“Hmm?” Taeyeon looked at Sunny in confusion.

Her friend’s eyebrows were furrowed in concern. “You’re very quiet today, Taeyeon. Is something bothering you?”

“Ah.” Taeyeon shook her head. “It’s nothing. Just a little tired, that’s all.” She kept walking, not noticing the looks the two exchanged behind her back.

“Hey, Taeyeon, you wanna go get ice-cream?” Sooyoung asked hopefully. “The shop around the corner just added a new flavor.”

Taeyeon raised her eyebrows, not stopping. “Sooyoung, is that question for me or for you?”

“Yah! Sunny wants ice-cream, right?” The tall girl pointed at Sunny indignantly, making Taeyeon laugh. She made a face.

“Not really feeling like ice-cream tonight. Sorry, guys.”

The two looked at each other, their eyes wide. Kim Taeyeon, turning down ice-cream? “Taeyeon,” said Sunny gently, “What about we go get a drink?”

“Yeah, sounds like a good idea,” nodded Sooyoung. “The usual place?”

They both waited anxiously for Taeyeon’s reaction. After a moment’s contemplation, their friend shrugged. “Sure, why not.” Changing direction, Taeyeon led them towards their new destination.

What’s wrong? mouthed Sooyoung.

I don’t know. Sunny shrugged.

Looking worriedly at the slight figure in front of them, Sunny and Sooyoung jumped when Taeyeon suddenly turned around. She frowned. “What are you guys doing? You’re blocking the road. Come on.”

They ran to catch up.

--

Eyeing the expanding collection of glasses in front of Taeyeon, Sunny nudged Sooyoung.

“Yah!” Sooyoung rubbed her elbow. “Watch what you’re whacking. Adjust for the height difference, please.”

Sunny rolled her eyes. “I thought we were going to make sure she doesn’t drink too much?” They watched in dismay as the alcohol in the most recent cup disappeared down Taeyeon’s throat.

“That’s eight shots,” whispered Sooyoung, careful not to let their friend overhear. “Isn’t she kind of not that great with alcohol?”

Taeyeon’s eyes were dull as she watched the man finish his song. Taking advantage of the clapping, Sunny spoke quickly. “Okay, something’s up. She’s not her usual self.” When Sooyoung nodded, she continued. “She’s been acting kind of weird lately. Did you notice?”

“Maybe she really is just tired?”

When Taeyeon reached for Sooyoung’s bottle, Sunny gently prised it from Taeyeon’s fingers. “Here, drink some water,” she said, pushing a glass towards Taeyeon. They held their breaths as Taeyeon stared numbly at the water in her hand, then downed it in one go.

“Yeah, okay.” Sooyoung sighed, “You’re right. Something is wrong. Well, at least she hasn’t sung ye-”

Taeyeon suddenly slipped out of the booth and made her way erratically towards the stage.

“Shoot.” They looked worriedly at each other. “Okay, something is really, really wrong.” Sunny nodded in agreement, glancing at their friend.

This bar was special to their little group of friends. The service was good, and there was nothing shady going on. Whenever they wanted to chill, they’d come here – mostly for the music.

There was an open mic on the stage in the middle of the bar. Anyone could go up, choose a song, and spend three minutes in the spotlight. It got progressively more amusing as the night went on, usually, because as people drank more, the melodies started to sound more and more warped.

As a rule, they – Sunny, Sooyoung, Taeyeon and Tiffany – didn’t sing. It was more fun, they agreed, to watch people sing. Usually, this was the case.

However, whenever she was angry, or sad, or confused enough to get drunk, Taeyeon would gravitate towards the mic. The girl had an amazing voice, and her friends admired her for it, but to them it was a source of sorrow because Taeyeon never stepped on the stage unless something was really bothering her. And now, barely forty-five minutes had passed and already Taeyeon was sitting down on the stool placed before the mic.

When the DJ came over to help her adjust the mic, Taeyeon whispered to him; he nodded and left.

Sunny drummed her fingers on the table while Sooyoung played with her straw. “How bad?”

“Hmm.” Sunny paused briefly, thinking. “I’d say between Mellow and Sad.”

Sooyoung tilted her head, considering their ranking system for Taeyeon’s song choices – Happy (which was almost never), Eh, Mellow, Sad, Angry and Depressing. “Yeah, I’d say that’s about right. Let’s see.”

They waited expectantly for the music to start, but when the first chords melted through the speakers, Sunny bit her lip. “Crap.”

Sooyoung rubbed her temples. “Okay, I didn’t expect Depressing right off the bat.” She listened for a moment. “Wait, I know this song!”

At that moment, Taeyeon took a breath and began. The two at the table were, just like every time, temporarily stunned by the richness of their friend’s voice; it was just simply mesmerizing. Then Sooyoung started to hum along.

“This is ‘That Girl’, right? David Choi?” She joined in softly. “I’m just having conversations with the thoughts in my head; all I hear are angels crying – oh, won’t they just sing instead?”

“It would be wrong for me to say…” Sunny stopped suddenly. “You’re right. That’s the song.”

Up on stage, Taeyeon had closed her eyes. “I don’t need that girl by my side, I don’t need that girl in my life; I don’t want to talk it out, or hold her when she cries.”

“Okay, I’m calling Fany.” Sooyoung whipped out her phone and busily keyed in a number. “There better be a good explanation for this.”

“I don’t want to say that she’s mine; I don’t want to tell her that I love her more than life,” Taeyeon’s voice cracked. “More than life.”

“Dang it!” Sunny leaned forward in concern as Sooyoung slammed her phone down on the table. “She’s not answering.”

Sunny tapped in time to the music. “Sooyoung, have you noticed how they seemed to be kind of distant these few weeks?”

“Hmm?” Sooyoung looked up from the screen of her phone. “Uh…I guess not. I didn’t really notice, since Tiffany was super hyper the last time we saw her.”

Sunny had to smile. “Yeah. Her friend was pretty funny. What was her name?”

“Y something,” said Sooyoung, mumbling to herself. “Yoo?”

“Yuri, I think. Yeah, that’s it. Yuri.” Sunny glanced up at the stage, where their friend was nearing the end of her song, oblivious to their conversation.

Sooyoung paused. “Wait, so you’re saying…”

“I mean, I don’t know,” said Sunny quickly, shrugging. “But I don’t really remember Taeyeon saying much that dinner.”

“So-” Sooyoung was interrupted as applause broke out. Taeyeon made her way unsteadily back to their table and slumped into her seat. “Hey, you okay? You look really bad.”

Sunny glared at Sooyoung. “Taeng,” she said, moving so that she was facing Taeyeon, “What’s bothering you?”

Taeyeon looked up but didn’t say anything.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

She shook her head slowly.

“Is this about Fany?”

Taeyeon looked away and tried to reach for Sunny’s drink. When Sooyoung pulled it out of her reach, Taeyeon huffed in frustration. She stumbled out of the booth.

“Hey, Taeng!” Sunny called after her friend, but Taeyeon didn’t turn around. They watched helplessly as Taeyeon leaned heavily on the bar counter and spoke to the bartender.

“I’ll go get her.” Easing herself out of the narrow booth, Sooyoung hurried over to Taeyeon. “Hey, Taeyeon,” she said as the bartender placed a new drink in front of the drunk girl. “Hey, let’s go back, okay? Just leave that here; let’s go home.”

When Sooyoung tried to take the drink out of Taeyeon’s hand, the shorter girl growled and clutched the glass. She turned around and began to lurch back to the table as Sooyoung hovered helplessly, not sure whether or not to help. She was growing a little frightened – never before had Taeyeon tried to get this drunk.

Taeyeon struggled into her seat, her glass clunking heavily onto the table, some of its contents sloshing out.

“Aish, Taengoo,” sighed Sunny. She grabbed a napkin and began to wipe Taeyeon’s hands. The girl didn’t react, just stared at her drink. After she had finished mopping up the table, Sunny looked at Sooyoung.

“Call again?” Sooyoung unlocked her phone.

Sunny nodded worriedly, turning back to Taeng. Their friend had not moved. “Tell her she needs to get here. Now.”

--

Taeyeon was vaguely aware of something soft on her fingers, a snatch of a familiar voice. Sunny? She didn’t know; it didn’t matter.

What mattered was

Fany

Fany

Fany.

She sighed inwardly. Maybe she was really sighing, in real life. Except this was real life. Right?

Fany.

Fany.

Yuri.

Taeyeon clenched her jaw. Yuri. She didn’t know when it had all happened, but somehow the girl, annoyingly attractive as she was, had slipped into their lives. She could still hear Tiffany’s voice, her happy, loud voice – saying, “Yurreeeee!”

Whatever happened to Taetae?

Oh, she remembered that dinner. The one with Sunny and Sooyoung, and Fany, and somehow Yuri.

Worst. Night. Ever.

Tiffany was between the two of them – Taeng and Yuri, that is. It really shouldn’t have been a problem; the labeling was correct, clear, defined. Taey