#48 - “Am I not enough for you anymore?”

TaeJin

Word Count: 564

“Am I not enough for you anymore?” The words repeated in his mind over and over again. Though really all he wanted answered was how did they get here? How had they started out so well and fell so far. The distance between the two had been growing for months now. It wasn’t really a surprise but honestly Seokjin felt it coming for too long. He knew it but didn’t want to admit. Now he was forced to. He was being asked those words that over and over without them actually being uttered more than once. Seokjin took a seat, feeling the air leave his lungs and not returning.

Rubbing his chin, Seokjin braced himself before training his eyes on his boyfriends. Hah, how silly of him to actually think he had fully prepared himself to look into those beautifully sad eyes. They were devoid of so much life yet still achingly beautiful. The silence grew thick and heavy but neither one of the men moved. Taehyung was standing a few feet away from him, it was probably the stillest that Seokjin had ever seen him. It wasn’t normal, this wasn’t the Taehyung he knew, this wasn’t his Taehyung. Then again, when was the last time he had been Taehyung’s Seokjin? That was a good question. He honestly wasn’t sure if he felt so hurt right now because he wasn’t ready to let go of Taehyung, because he still loved the man or because he just wasn’t ready to let go of all of their memories and time spent together.

“Seokjin-ah… please…” The younger pleaded as he balled his hand into a fist and his nails bit into his skin. The pain was grounding, it was needed. Watching this only made the iron grip around his heart clench further. “I-I don’t know Tae.” It was impossible for him to tear his eyes away from the others but the change was drastic. They were dead. He had killed it, any sparkle that was previously there, that was trying to come out. “Ah… “ Taehyung his lips and let his hands go slack. “Well…” The tightness in his boyfriend's voice wasn’t something he ever wanted to hear again but did he even have the right to think that right now? Probably now. Taehyung walked out of the room and Seokjin didn’t follow, he couldn’t get his legs to move properly. They were too heavy like they were made out of lead.

When his boyfriend appeared again he had a suitcase. “I’ll go stay with Jiminie.” Taehyung barely spared him a glance as he walked towards the door but he hesitated with his hand on the door knob. It was all a rush but the next moment Taehyung was standing right in front of him, bending down and brushing his lips against Seokjin’s. He didn’t deserve, he didn’t deserve it, he didn’t deserve. Taehyung didn’t say I love you but he didn’t have to, it was all in that chaste and almost sloppy kiss. The mix of salty tears lingered on Seokjin’s lips and the crushing grip on his heart squeezed so tightly, he wasn’t sure he could take it.

The door clicked and Taehyung was gone.

He was gone and Seokjin didn’t deserve him.

Sitting alone, he didn’t move for the rest of the night; just felt his own tears mix with the man he loved.