Secret Relationship & Insecurities
The Warrior Ice Prince
The Warrior Ice Prince
Chapter 88 : Secret Relationship and Insecurities
Your POV:
Yoseob took me home despite my protests which brought me back to the time when we had first met. He had practically shoved me into his car as he had done just now, but gentler. In fact, I had been escorted and the door was opened for me. Okay, now that I think about it, I was probably just giving in to him, but it was hard not to.
He parked the car on the side of the street in front of my house and swooped low for a quick kiss which I had immediately became embarrassed about.
"Don't do that!" I exclaimed in a whisper as if anyone could hear when we were inside of the car. "Do what? Kiss you? I thought that the feelings were mutual." He eyed me with that slight smirk and I knew he was making fun of me. "We still need to talk, okay? I just can't— Not yet, it's too fast." I shook my head and began to exit, but Yoseob took a firm grip on my hand. He moved forward again and stared at me with his eyes that were filled with so much coolness and, for the first time, happiness. "Okay," he said, "I'll see you tomorrow."
I nodded and he released me. He pecked me on the lips again and smiled mischievously. "Yoseob!" I covered my mouth with one hand and hit his arm with another. "Sorry, couldn't help myself." He said in a tone that obviously told me that he was completely not sorry whatsoever. "Whatever..." I grumbled and stepped onto the sidewalk. I went inside and Yoseob drove away.
Behind the closed door, I began to feel a headache coming on and I held onto my crown. "Oh my gosh, what did I just do..."
"I don't see why we have to meet here in the most deserted corner of this coffee shop..." Yoseob looked around as he observed the area I had picked then sipped on his beverage. "That's kind of what I wanted to talk to you about and some other things." I quickly lifted my off of the chair to make sure no one we knew was around. When I deemed it clear, I sat back down to find Yoseob looking toward me with an eyebrow raised.
"Okay then. I also have a question of my own if I am clear to proceed." This time I raised my brows at his mockingly formal language, but okayed him.
"Tell me about what really happened between you and Minwoo. I'm sure it's more than just 'you didn't work out." He caught on fast. Or maybe it was just obvious. I told him everything and by the end, he was smirking obnoxiously which made me embarrassed about what I said. "So the whole time it was me." he sat back in cocky leisure, "I want to say that I knew it, but I didn't. I had no idea what I was going to do, but I was still going to let you go if you were happy with him. You changed me. I would have held onto you even if you hated me." His eyes told me that he spoke the truth. It made my heart feel warmed up and fuzzy.
I cleared my throat. "Um, anyway, what I wanted to say was..." Yoseob looked up expectantly. "I think that we should keep, you know, us a secret for a while." Yoseob took in his surroundings again. "I guess that's the reason you wanted you meet here." He looked disappointed. "I guess I understand what you mean though, but I hope you know that I really don't wanna do this."
"It'll just be for a short while." I assured. In the end he agreed and to tell him right away whenever I was ready to be public. However, he warned that if I took too long, he might just stop.
Of course.
After secretly cuddling together in the corner of the booth for a while and stealing little kisses, we separated and went home. Mir was there and I didn't dare tell him about my whereabouts. For some reason, I felt like my secret relationship with Yoseob had to be kept away from everyone.
Yoseob's POV:
Yoseob stayed true to his words for the next couple of weeks. He hated it. He hated pretending that his girlfriend (he was still getting over the fact that _____ was his or that he had one at all) was no one more than a stranger.
At school, they passed each other without so much as eye contact and it killed him every time. He could barely sit near her without something seeming suspicious. It was frustrating in those moments when he just wanted to hold her hand or speak with her freely whenever he wanted, but their little meetups that were usually somewhere deserted or his house made up for most of it.
It felt nice with another person in his spacious house. He felt more full and made him daydream about the future when he'd wake up with her next to him every single morning.
Unfortunately, it was starting to lose some of the effect already. He had tried convincing her to let them be together in public in more of joking way, but it was always a no.
Today, his one and only was over to watch movies and snuggle together before the school week restarted. Everything was comfy; the couch the atmosphere and _____ resting her head on his shoulder. It was pure bliss.
"Hey, Baby?" Yoseob called affectionately. "Mm?" "You feeling hungry?" She shook her head. "Not yet. Why? Were you going to make me something good?" She looked up at him and smiled angelically.
How could a person love another so much?
He wanted to smile too, but he smothered it. "No, I wanted to make sure you starve." He responded as emotionless as possible. "So mean." She stuck out her tongue and moved away from him. Only then did Yoseob smile. Teasing her was his absolute most favourite thing to do. Except for maybe kissing. He was a big fan of that.
He leaned over, but she turned away. "Bully boyfriends don't deserve kisses." _____ said as if reading his mind. His girl knew him so well.
Without a word, he grabbed onto her waist and moved forward until she leaned back onto her elbow. He kissed her tenderly feeling like he was up in the clouds.
"You kiss me too much." _____ said, gave a disapproving look when he pulled away a couple inches. "You never stop me." He responded, knowing he made a very valid point. She said nothing and he knew he had triumphed again. "I win." Sitting upright, he opened his arms and welcomed her back in.
It was peaceful again as they quietly watched TV together. Yoseob softly ran his fingers through her hair and savoured the moment. Again, he wished that he could do this anywhere without restraint. He was complied to ask again, but didn't want to rush her. In the end, he was squirming too much on the inside and couldn't stand it.
"Can't we just be a couple now? Wherever we are?" He asked, knowing that it made her squirm a little as well. "I don't know, I don't think the time is right still." She shook her head and buried herself deeper into him. He felt concerned and annoyed at the same time.
"Why isn't it? You haven't even really told me why we're doing this in the first place." She didn't move for a while, but Yoseob was patient.She was always the most distressed when the topic was brought up and although he had no wishes to be pushy, it seemed that nothing would move forward if he sat and did squat.
After a while, words exited , but it was small and quiet. He almost didn't even catch what she said.
"I'm scared."
He was surprised and began brushing the back of her hand with his thumb to comfort her a little. "Of what?"
"Everything." She whispered, tensing up. "I'm afraid of what everyone will think, I'm afraid of Mir oppa, Luna and Sungjong."
"That's it? Who cares what other people think? You were never one to succumb to rumours. As for your brother and your friends, even if they don't approve of us, of me, we can change their minds for sure." Yoseob said, feeling confident in his words, but they didn't seem to have affect on her.
"You don't understand." _____ moved out of his warmth with her head down so her eyes were shielded by locks of hair. " _____." He reached for her, but as he neared, she flinched. He was positively hurt by the cold response, but retracted back. Now he could understand how it felt when he had done the exact same thing before.
"You don't even know how bad it was the first time. If the people at university see me with you, what kinds of things would they think? I'm not worried that Luna or Oppa or Sungjong or whoever won't accept our relationship because I know that they'll be supportive no matter what, but it will always be there in the back of their minds of what happened. They will always be questioning silently if I'm making a terrible mistake."
He realized that she was referring to the time when all he did was violently stomp on her feelings for him in her impromptu confession. He hated what he did more than he hated anything. He regretted it more than he regretted anything else. It happened a while ago, yet still haunted the one he loved the most. It's something he could never ever forgive himself for. He would apologize as many times as it would take for her to forgive him.
"Listen to me, _____-"
"That's not all." She cut him off sharply, something that she's never done to him before and was forced to sit still once again. "On top of the constant doubt going on their minds and me, knowing that it's there, will have my own doubts."
That struck fear into him at the possibility. One day, the only person he has could decide that she doesn't want to be with him anymore. All of this because of one stupid mistake. He had been so idiotic that he annoyed himself.
"I'm afraid that all of this isn't even real or that I'll believe it so much and then it'll just end up like last time. I don't think I can handle it if it happens again."
Yoseob's eyes widen in horror. In the end, it was him she was afraid of. He was the last person he would ever want her to be wary of. It disgusted him. He disgusted himself.
He lost all sanity just thinking of her doubtfulness that might eventually leave him alone. He grabbed her and pulled her in, burying his face onto her shoulder.
She couldn't leave him. There was nothing for him if she did. He was terrified. He was terrified that because of that one mistake, he could lose everything. It made him feel like he wasn't good enough for her which he wasn't. Not at all, but he needed her.
"I hate myself. I hate myself so much for harming you and for continuing to harm you, but I can tell you right now that that with never happen again. I love you so much and you're all have literally." At that moment he felt so insecure. "Please...please don't have doubts about me. Please don't leave me." He begged without hesitation. It was unheard of that the Yang Yoseob would even think of begging, but he would stop at nothing to stay together with this one person.
_____ kissed his head and his back. "I guess we both have our own insecurities." She paused for a few moments, just comforting him with her touch. Only to her would he reveal his whole heart.
"We'll just have to work through them together then, hm?" He was lifted up so they could look at each other and he saw the smile on her face. Yoseob nodded and they kissed, not just for his entertainment this time, but as a promise.
Together, they settled on the couch feeling better after telling each other about their insecurities. They continued to watch the movie that was playing on TV silently until Yoseob was surprised with _____'s sudden decision.
"Let's tell everyone. Tomorrow." She finally said what he had been waiting to hear for a while. "Are you sure? You don't have to you know." He was willing to wait a while longer now that he had heard what she had said, but she shook her head. "If I have you to protect me, what is there to be scared of?"
Yoseob smiled at her confidence in him and answered appropriately. "Nothing."
Even though I'm busy, I decided to gift an update because it's my birthday today. Happy early Halloween!
Hey all, I know it's been a really long time, but I have some words I'd like to share with you if you would be so inclined. I have it in the currently one, but will be two new updates so please read them! Thank you so much for your time, SarahChi1023
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