Sometimes we meet someone meant to be in our lives for a little while and sometimes we meet people meant to stay in our life for the rest of our lives. Typically you fall in love with that person, and I did. At least I had thought so.

A few years ago now I went to Lee Jinki’s house to tell him I’d fallen madly in love with him, that I couldn’t imagine living without him. That same night I guess it wasn’t meant to be because he told me that we weren’t working. Along the way somewhere we’d both changed and he couldn’t stay with me. At the time if felt like my heart had cracked in half then turned to dust in the most painful way possible. I’d spent so much time wondering how we could have felt something so different from what had started our beautiful and long relationship. Maybe it was that, we’d had this nice long and great relationship and we were caught in this rut, like it was never ending. Between forever and always going on and ending.

Though I am thankful that he told me, I couldn’t imagine what it’d been like if he’d kept those thoughts, insecurities; to himself…No I really am happy. I am now at least.

“You ok?” Jonghyun asks holding my hand, I’d met him a year or so after that night. “Shira, sweetie?”

“I’m fine, just thinking.” I say with a smile, though I do feel that tug, that insecurity that if what I’m feeling for Jonghyun is anything like Jinki that this will have the same ending; him leaving me heartbroken.

Jonghyun sends me a curious glance, grasping my hand in his “What about?”

Sighing I just watch him carefully. “About things,” this of course is not an acceptable answer. “Feelings.” I say, I feel this is a rather neutral way to say love, or past relationships. Maybe not though…

“Feelings…” Jonghyun smiles at me “Like a strong attraction towards a certain person?”

Chuckling I nod my head, well two people, but I’m not about to spoil this moment right now.

In life we get lucky sometimes, love doesn’t always work out, but eventually it does. Life is the messy bits, all the parts that you want to skip, relive, retell, experience again, life is a surprise that we’re all in. Being here and now with Jonghyun is amazing, but as I think those words life throws in another surprise, life throws Lee Jinki right back into my life.

“Onew I haven’t seen you in forever!” Jonghyun yells suddenly hopping up from the table we’d been sitting at. I’m supposed to meet Jonghyun’s old friend today seeing has he’s in town today. “I want you to meet someone!” He says excitedly.

Life seems cruel right now; I’d though I’d been down with my feelings for Jinki, but apparently not. I feel that same twist in my stomach, my heart speeding up, or maybe this is all from nerves. “Shira?” Jinki asks surprised as Jonghyun leads him to the table.

“Jinki?” I ask surprised “You know Jonghyun?” I ask him as though Jonghyun wasn’t right here with us, like everything I’ve ever felt suddenly was knocked out of me then in an instant it’s shoved all back in. “Honey?”

“You two know each other?” Jonghyun asks as he takes a seat and Jinki across from me. “How?”

Onew, I suppose, and I glance at each other. “We dated.” As an awkward atmosphere settles I my lips glancing at Jonghyun carefully. “Are you ok?”

“This is your Shira?” Jonghyun asks angrily turning to Onew.

Shocked I stare at the two friends; both Onew and Jonghyun are looking at me now. “It’s been a while Shira.” Onew says smiling nervously at me.

“Yeah.” I mumble smiling at him. “Anyways Jonghyun…”Turning to look at him he’s watching me carefully. “I suppose that I was that Shira.” I say gently.

“Then I guess introductions aren’t needed.” He says with his jaw clenched.

Getting through the lunch was difficult and awkward. Knowing the conversation that will follow will be just as difficult. Jonghyun knows that I’d been in love with Onew. Jonghyun and I had decided it’d be necessary for our relationship to be a serious one, so we got all our past meaningful relationships out in the open. So as of consequence Jonghyun knows how intense my feelings for him had been.

“You still feel the same about him.” Jonghyun says once we’re alone. “You’re still in love with him.”

Shaking my head I frown. “I am not. You have to admit if you were in my shoes you’d be thrown out of it seeing someone like that suddenly and by complete surprise.” I argue, well try to.

“Shira…” Jonghyun mumbles stopping me as we walk. “I saw how you looked at him…”

“Jonghyun what happened then was then. I’m not going to focus on that. Besides Jonghyun…” I stop because he’s not listening anymore. I stop because he’s walking away from me. I can’t blame him, I really can’t. How was I supposed to know that Jonghyun and Onew go way back? Running to catch up with him I silently walk next to him just waiting for whatever is brewing in that skull of his to finish.

“You know when you first told me about Onew I thought you were the girl he’d decided to move on from.” Jonghyun finally says. “He wanted to finish school and to leave the town where you grew up. He wanted for you to just explore life wanted nothing but the best…” Jonghyun trails off turning to face me his face is contorted into a mix of anger and sadness. “You must have seen how he was looking at you.”

Shaking my head I send him a nervous smile. “I was too busy looking at you. Jonghyun I really am over whether his intentions were for the best or not. Doesn’t matter, I like you.”

“But you love him.”

“Loved” I correct him gently, sighing I take his hand and kiss it. “Jonghyun just because he’s back suddenly doesn’t mean I’ll leave what’s important, what I care about.”

Letting out a sigh he lifts his other hand to my face, caressing it he smiles at me “I won’t ever leave you.” He whispers quietly, leaning in he smiles. “Onew may have been dumb enough to think that you’d wait around, but I’m not.” He says kissing me with care, holding me close like he’s afraid that I’ll be the one to leave.

“Jonghyun” I whisper our lips barely touching now. “I don’t want to alarm you or anything but I think I’m falling in love with you.”

“Shira I’m falling with you.” He says pressing his lips against mine again, I don’t care why Onew left me, broke up with me or whatever. All I know is that I’ve found something worth holding on to; I’ve found something where I’m not caught in the middle.

A request, I do have a follow up for this, as I seem to do things out of order
it'll be Onew's so look forward to that. c:
sorry it's taken me awhile to update ;^;
I still have thought out a schedule, I know lazy.
I'll get on it and post it soon...Hopefully
Anyways enjoy, Comment and Subscribe
ANDDD request c:
<3

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